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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26282134">Subclinical Manifestation</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/p_crowds/pseuds/p_crowds'>p_crowds</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Medical, Best Friends, Eventual Romance, F/M, Male-Female Friendship, Medical Professionals, Medical School, Platonic Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 07:00:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>79,558</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26282134</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/p_crowds/pseuds/p_crowds</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>In the matter of love, would he keep things subclinical? </p><p>-</p><p>Platonically involved for years sharing an apartment as they struggle in medical school, there comes the time when he starts to question himself. </p><p>Medical School AU. SasuHina</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hyuuga Hinata/Uchiha Sasuke, Hyuuga Hinata/Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>83</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Academic system in the story:</p><p>Primary school : 6 years</p><p>Middle School : 3 years</p><p>High School : 3 years</p><p>Medical School</p><p>Pre-clinical : 3,5 years</p><p>Clinical : 1,5 years</p><p>Internship as GP : 1 year</p><p>Residency : depends</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>sub·clin·i·cal</p><p>the early stage(s) of a disease or abnormality before symptoms and signs become apparent or detectable by clinical examination</p><p>man·i·fes·ta·tion</p><p>a symptom or sign of an ailment</p><p>.</p>
<hr/><p>"I think a relationship is nice," Hinata voiced just above a whisper. Her words hung low in the air, waiting for any response or anything at all. He heard her just as clear and she knew it. Knowing he was just too occupied on taking notes and eyes focused on the screen too much that he squinted occasionally, she started again, facing him this time, "What do you think?"</p><p>Sasuke was sitting in one of the chairs of four, with laptop only forty centimeters away from his eyes atop the dining table. A notebook right beside the laptop as he occasionally took notes. Her question came too sudden, but he heard her the first time. He was just trying to understand why would a cyst form in the ovary and all the pathomechanisms saved in his head were popped disappearing like a bubble once she broke the silence. He turned his head to look at her—sitting with legs crossed atop the microfiber rug before the black wooden table as her back leaned on the beige colored couch. It was supposed to be their living room but they weren't ones to watch television so there wasn't any and only the tv stand adhered to the wall in front of her. As the most spacious room in the apartment, it became the best place for them to study together with as much space needed individually. The living room was continuous with the kitchen with granite counter and the dining table—of where he was sitting at the moment—separated them. Despite annoyed with the sudden invasion, he answered without any interest.</p><p>"You aren't interested in relationship," he stated and waited for her with hard stare. He hoped she take the cue and just answer immediately to let this odd conversation end. He needed to concentrate for the damn cyst. "Or at least you weren't."</p><p>"I know and I still am," she answered immediately, noticing the urge in his eyes. He looked tired, with dark shadow under the eyes and coffee ever present—she could only know it wasn't the first three cups. She actually felt bad for bringing up this unnecessary topic in the middle of their studying session—exams are getting near and they needed to study real bad. But she was just as tired as him, it was a half past two in the morning, they have class at eight, shouldn't they just sleep already?</p><p>"But, what if?"</p><p>"Then, it is you to decide," he replied tersely, still, uninterested.</p><p>"I need your opinion, dear Sasuke, why would I ask otherwise?" She was desperate for a break and she wanted to take him with her.</p><p>"Hinata, stop," he tried, tiredness lingered in his voice, "I need to focus."</p><p>"Well, me too! But—"</p><p>"What is this all about anyway?"</p><p>"There.. there is this guy," she started, averting her eyes to look at Sasuke's laptop.</p><p>At a sudden, Sasuke was intrigued to ask more. They never talked about relationship before, not even once. Well, once in the first year of medical school after watching a friend of her cried because of a break up, Hinata stated she really didn't know why would anyone started a relationship in the first place and he agreed and that is all. Despite her long-time crush at their friend—Naruto—that had gradually disappeared as they study at different universities and she was too preoccupied with all the studies so she stopped thinking about him—at least that was what she told him. So this was new to him, and he was always up for something new of his "flat mate" he gradually discovered over the years of knowing her. He was tired and she was too, might as well finished his study, converse for five minutes and sleep. Noticeably sighing, he turned off and closed his laptop then watch Hinata with full attention. "At our school?"</p><p>Her face started to color in embarrassement. "I'm not telling—are you done?"</p><p>"Tell me then let's sleep." She wouldn't put the talk away if she didn't end up telling him. Knowing her for such length, he wouldn't dare to answer otherwise or the conversation would meet to no end.</p><p>She sighed. "I was just.. I just wanted a break, I needed to finish this one." Then closed her laptop despite herself. She stood and stretched her legs a bit before pulling a chair opposite of Sasuke and sit there herself. "You know the guy. It would be embarrassing."</p><p>"You know I won't make any sound of it."</p><p>"I know," she said with elaborate end. Then, as if fearing anyone would hear—despite only two of them in the space—she murmured, "you know Gaara, right?"</p><p>The gloomy red haired guy with pale eyes, Sasuke thought in an instant. He didn't seem like the guy to go out. "He asked you out?"</p><p>"No!" she was utterly embarrassed, palms directed at Sasuke to shield herself or to give him the proper gesture of denial. "He asked me to have lunch together."</p><p>"We always have lunch together," he stated like it was the most normal thing. It was normal, at least for them.</p><p>"It's different," she said it more calmly now, "we just occasionally meet when grouped together, we barely talk! Then suddenly he asked me to have lunch with him."</p><p>Something in Sasuke's eyes changed. It turned into half bewilderment half uninterested—still. Hinata noticed, so she elaborate. "I mean it would be different than you, because," she trailed off, because? "you are.. you."</p><p>It was amusing because he never really thought about it. About them. He had known Hinata since first grade in high school when he moved back to Konoha with his family. He was the new guy in their high school and on the first day of him going to school, he only knew two person. Naruto, his preschool to primary school friend—before moving due to his Father's work and Hinata, his new neighbor and surprisingly classmate.</p><p>Having to only acquaintance with only two person—in which he didn't intend to have any addition—they grew together as three best friends, somehow. Probably because Naruto is someone to rely to—despite their opposite personality and Hinata was someone he could tolerate to and she was his neighbor so it was all convenient. Turned out Hinata'd had a crush for Naruto since middle school and she cherished the moments they could spend together—at least with Naruto. This was how the three of them became best friends.</p><p>How the two of them became even closer as best friends, however, started when he finally decided—at second grade—to attend medical school after finishing high school, just like Hinata. He never really had any particular interest in anything, really, having no difficulties in studies throughout high school and he could just be anything he wanted to be. Raised in a family of engineers, as how his father, mother—despite choosing to be a housewife, and even his older brother of five years were, he always thought to become one in the future. Just how Hinata was raised in the prestigious family of surgeons, his father was a neurosurgeon, his late mother was a cardiothoracic surgeon, and his cousin too had just accepted to the most prestigious medical school in the country at the time. Pressured by her father expectations, Hinata had only one vision for the future, to be a doctor herself. Though she wasn't handling high school with straight A as smooth as Sasuke, with struggles here and there, she had set her mind and when she did, she did it with all her might. Becoming a doctor wasn't only about proving her capabilities to her father, he remarked, she genuinely wanted to become a doctor, a doctor like her mother she had said. Watching her inspired him so he wanted to become a doctor himself. His family agreed at once. As he announced—more like stated to the other two—about his desire to attend medical school, her eyes lighted up. At the start of their third grade, she propose to have him as her study buddy—more like mentor. It was brave of her, despite her shy nature. It proved him just how much she wanted to be accepted in one and not just any medical school, but the one his cousin had attended to, Konoha Medical School. She was just willing to try anything. She was just that determined. Deeming it would advantage not only her but also himself, he agreed.</p><p>They would study after school hours and the weekends, either at Sasuke's home or Hinata's, they switched fairly. It was always better in Sasuke's home, where his mother would prepare snacks for them and observe them with self joy. On the contrary, at Hinata's, every time felt too quiet. Her father rarely at home—he always spent most of his hours in the hospital and would only be home late in the evening, and Hanabi was just a sister with the same quiet personality as Hinata, albeit more daring. One day, she exchanged his textbook with hers—middle school one—and he could only cursed mentally as guilt-ridden Hinata offered to share her book.</p><p>Having caught up in his own reverie made Hinata think he was already somnolent but just too polite—or too proud—to admit. She slumped her shoulders before she stood up, this conversation was useless, she should knew better. Walking pass him toward her room, she gently touched his tensed shoulder. She could feel a slight flinch from him. "Forget it, see you at breakfast."</p><p>Then she proceeded to her room and closed the door behind.</p><p>Not bothering to clean his belongings on the dining table, he walked to his room himself.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I decided to try this site out! Thank you for reading :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>To understand the medschool program better;</p><p>Schedule /week</p><p>Monday - Lecture (in the lecture hall consisting the whole students at a time)</p><p>Tuesday - Tutor class (discussion group with ten students and one doctor—called Tutor)</p><p>Wednesday - Clinical Skill class (same group as Tutor class)</p><p>Thursday - Laboratory Activity class (same group as Tutor class)</p><p>Friday – Tutor class</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>pre·cip·i·tat·ing fac·tor</p><p>specific event or trigger to the onset of the current problem</p><p>.</p><hr/><p><br/>The sound of alarm dragged him out of his pool of serene darkness. Abruptly opened his eyes in subconscious shock, his hand creeping to the nightstand on the right side of the bed. As panic rush disappeared quickly as it had appeared, he turned off the alarm and check his phone for the time. Fifteen minutes past seven. He almost overslept. Yet he felt the need to close his eyes for another five minutes.</p><p>If there was any drowsiness left, a knock on his door woke him up completely.</p><p>"Sasuke, I don't want to be late," said the girl outside.</p><p>Grunting a response, he sat upright reluctantly. He then quickly made his bed and rushed to prep himself for school.</p><hr/><p>The ride to their school usually took fifteen minutes with car, today was no different. As Sasuke parked his black 99' Corolla Altis, Hinata's phone showed they only had five minutes to run to their lecture hall. Despite stated it clearly she didn't want to be late, just like any other time, Sasuke ended up finishing breakfast just barely past twenty five minutes to eight, just like any other time. The morning routine was always started with a knock to Sasuke's door before Hinata prepare breakfast—simple scrambled egg and toast or heating last night leftover and only cereals on the exam days, then Sasuke would join breakfast as Hinata finishing hers, do their dishes individually, and drive to school with Sasuke's car. Hinata had started a talk one day about his too "punctual" nature, said she needed those minutes before the professor arrive to arrange her mind for the upcoming lecture, which to that Sasuke gave him a look of "just-use-the-damn-public-transportation-then". Hinata could only answered him with "but-I-always-prepare-breakfast" look. Sasuke could only shrugged and Hinata didn't dwell on the matter afterwards, she could just make Sasuke explain to her the things she could hardly understand.</p><p>Arriving inside the lecture hall just barely before the professor, Sasuke chose the only vacant row—the front one—and sat at the most peripheral, Hinata followed suit and sat beside him. A couple more students rushed inside the lecture hall and a pink haired girl she barely recognized sat beside her. "This seat isn't taken, is it?"</p><p>Hinata shook her head invitingly and mouthed a no as the professor started his lecture about anatomical pathology of breast adenomas.</p><p>"As you never disappoint me," the silver-haired professor started, "I believe you've studied about the histology so we might as well skip that part—"</p><p>"What's wrong with a brief review?" Hinata turned to Sasuke.</p><p>Sasuke shrugged and proceeded to extract last night notebook from his denim backpack. "I present to you Professor Hatake," he mumbled apathetically.</p><p>Recognition of the name hit her. Eyes widened, she pursued further, "Professor Hatake? Then he is the professor in charge for your minor thesis, no?"</p><p>"—Fibroadenoma mammae is frequently occurred to early reproductive age—"</p><p>Still taking notes, he glanced with the corner of his eye to Hinata's desk, she too taking notes diligently. This was one amusing thing about her. She would pay attention to the lecture with dear life yet occasionally converse to him casually, like both task was possibly done with equal attention. She wasn't one to chat frequently, neither did he, yet when she did, it was always amusing—because it was always an unprecedented topic and time for her timid self—and he didn't mind participating. Contemplating a nod wouldn't be useful, he grunted in response.</p><p>Wasn't impressed with the professor introduction, Hinata questioned more, "how is it going with your minor thesis?" Evidently concern-filled.</p><p>Sasuke exhaled visibly. Unfortunately, minor thesis wasn't one of those unexpected topic. Hinata, as good-natured as she was, concerned about their minor thesis from time to time and occasionally asked about it to him. How he'd prefer to evade the inquiry was absolute. For the past two years as medical student—and currently running the third year—never did he felt unpleasant but the mention of minor thesis. He enjoyed studying medicine so far, enjoy might underrate his truly attitude toward the field, as apparently, he found himself couldn't possibly imagine himself enjoying another field as he did now. But minor thesis was definitely put him to start questioning himself.</p><p>"I haven't scheduled to meet him again," he said, eyeing his professor. "Since.." Weird, he couldn't remember the last time he face the professor.</p><p>"—Can anyone tell me the meaning of <em>secretory change</em> in lactating adenoma?"</p><p>The lecture hall turned quiet as two or three hands raised. "You at the front."</p><p>It was the girl beside Hinata. The girls stood up confidently. "Thank you, sir. I am Haruno Sakura from Group 7—"</p><p>Hinata recognized her name and she suddenly looked familiar too. Then it hit her. "Isn't she in the same group as you?"</p><p>Contemplating whether his notes was adequate, he grunted in response. Not interested to hear her answer as he and Hinata had discussed this the night before.</p><p>"I know!" she said triumphantly. "That's why she was so familiar." Then she remembered the topic about minor thesis. As much as she knew just how bad he didn't want to talk about it—in this they have the same attitude toward the task though Hinata had a way of not showing it to him—she knew if she didn't trigger him or anything, he wouldn't pursue to do the task further, and the fact that his professor was the one giving the lecture right now, well, her anxiety only grow. She really wanted them to graduate together and Sasuke only need a little push to actually do it—albeit not too eagerly. "Since?"</p><p>There she went again. "Since I don't know."</p><p>"Sasuke," Hinata started calmly and he knew maybe she'd expected much how he would answer. "It only means one thing."</p><p>"I'll meet him after class, satisfied?" She wouldn't stop pestering him now or later might as well he do it now. She was just too stubborn on ensuring them to graduate together. It is unquestionable that he felt the same, he maybe just needed the little push, or he just enjoyed her pestering protests about his lack of zeal. It could be multifactorial, he reasoned.</p><p>"Okay, class is dismissed."</p><p>"Sasuke!" Hinata squealed in surprise, "you must be quick!"</p><p>"Shit." Sasuke hastily put everything inside his backpack. While doing so, Hinata eyed him expectantly.</p><p>"See you at the library?"</p><p>He nodded in a hast as he walked past Hinata to go after Professor Hatake. He didn't spare any time to check whether Hinata catch his response or not, she won't be going anywhere but the library anyway.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke couldn't stop from rising both ends of his lips. Although his indolent appearance was evident, Professor Hatake wasn't that bad. He gave him opinions needed even before Sasuke asked him first and they agreed on the same page over the discussion. The encounter turned out better than expected and he could clearly see where he would take his minor thesis to. If only Hinata didn't pester him that much, he was sure he wouldn't be knowing this revelation anytime soon. He quickened his pace and pondered how he wanted to see her to tell everything and maybe buy her a meal after.</p><p>Making an entry to the library, he quick-scanned to Hinata's whereabout. Their usual place was always the table of six by the large windows and they would sit opposite of each other nearest the window. Hinata already seated at one side.</p><p>"Let's have a nice lunch before going home," he said as he pulled the chair opposite her quietly.</p><p>Hinata raised her head with mild shock then smiling herself, knowing his encounter with the professor turned out tolerable—or even better by looking at his escalating good mood. But she already had a plan and her change of facade wasn't unnoticed by Sasuke.</p><p>"I—I," she stuttered, contemplanting how to reject without hurting his pride.</p><p>By now Sasuke was already seated. Crossing his arms over his chest, he quirked an eyebrow. "You actually agreed to lunch with the Gaara guy?"</p><p>"Sorry," she said ruefully.</p><p>She didn't have to apologize, he thought. And yet he felt the need to question her of the sudden notice. They were always together. It felt weird imagining him eating by himself. It wasn't like it would be any different seeing that they barely talk in between meals. But, it was her presence, her choice for today's meal, her eating in front of him, how she always gave him the tomato she didn't like, her presence, her—</p><p>What was he thinking? It shouldn't irritate him this much, shouldn't it? It must be because of their habit of always under a meter proximity that he pondered about it rather aggressively. It was her choice to have a meal with anyone but him. It was only normal for him to have a meal by himself too. He eyed his watch, just minutes before lunch time. Before feeling pride left him any further, he stood up.</p><p>"Text me if you need a ride then," he said, both gazed at each other in bewilderment and he felt the need to elaborate, "I'll be around." He said and even more confused. He immediately left her there to watch his back with wide eyes.</p><hr/><p>After an hour deciding where to eat, there he stood in front of the cashier that eyed him impatiently. "Come on, boy, we ain't got whole day."</p><p>Sasuke surpressed the need to glare the cashier and walked away from the queue instead. It took him fifteen minutes standing in the queue—meanwhile still contemplating what to choose—and when it was time for him to order he still didn't know what to eat. It was always Hinata that order and he didn't even know the menu he liked here.</p><p>Extracting his phone from the kangoroo pocket of his navy sweatshirt, he checked the time all the while pondering whether to text Hinata on what to eat or not. He felt really childish, yet he couldn't shake the need to ask her himself. Typing rather eagerly but before he could touch send, Hinata sent him a message.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>Gaara drives me home.</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>He stared her message blankly as it showed she was still typing.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Will you be home?</em>
  </strong>
</p><p><strong><em>Sure</em></strong>—he immediately deleted it. He should eat something first. It would be weird if Hinata asked him what did he eat and he said he didn't eat. Wait—</p><p>Since when did he care about his answer to Hinata anyway? It never occurred to him before how to deliberately behave toward Hinata. His life with her in it was a flowing water with no dam ahead of the river. He just went with it without having to really think about anything. Now he was thinking about every damn thing. Why the sudden changes?</p><p>Averting his eyes from the phone screen, he looked upon the city scenery from the green tinted window of the donburi shop, looking for any inspiration—if any there is. Eyes locked to the convenience store across the street, he suddenly got a craving for onigiri.</p><p><strong><em>Sure.</em></strong> He sent it this time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Feedbacks are gladly appreciated!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.<br/>a·wak·en·ing<br/>an act or moment of becoming suddenly aware of something<br/>.</p><hr/><p>The indigo haired girl was sitting in the dining table when Sasuke arrived, already in comfortable attire. She typed something vigorously on her laptop and only gave him a quick glance when he closed the front door. After putting the plastic bag he was holding on the counter, he went straight to his room.</p><p>Hinata smelled something delightful and knew too well the cinnamon scented sweet treats. They frequently bought cinnamon rolls at the bakery store next to the convenience store on the way home after school. She bought them, Sasuke drove her and stayed inside the car most of the time. Once in the apartment, she was the only one to devour the glazed treats.</p><p>She didin't bought one today because she wasn't with Sasuke.</p><p>Sasuke didn't eat sweets.</p><p>What a rare occasion, she thought. In exchange for the lunch treat, she guessed. She smiled delightfully and decided to munch into one.</p><p>Evidently hair damp because of shower, Sasuke walked out of his room with laptop and his notebook fifteen minutes later. Hinata felt the need to complain and usher him to dry his hair first with towel but decided against it. She didn't need to, didn't she?</p><p>"Ah, thank you," said Hinata as she instantly remembered, "I already ate one."</p><p>Sasuke pulled a chair on the opposite side of Hinata, facing the unseated one next to her. He nodded in response.</p><p>"What did you eat?" Hinata casually asked, still typing on her laptop.</p><p>He briefly recalled buying two onigiris and a can of coffee before went to buy the cinnamon roll. He ate them as he drove home. He blinked. He was not to tell her about it.</p><p>"What is the menu that I usually eat at the<em> donburi</em> shop downtown?" he asked as normally sounded as he could.</p><p>"You ate there?" her eyes lighted up and turned downcast as quickly as it appeared. "I wish I ate there too."</p><p>"Where did you eat?" asked Sasuke, momentarily tried to confine his true curiosity.</p><p>"It was that new barbecue place," she answered then glanced at him multiple times as she was maintaining her focus on laptop screen, "did you remember the one I told you?"</p><p>Her counterpart nodded, their eyes locked once—twice—thrice—every time she glanced up from her laptop. Sasuke held her gaze the whole time. Hinata didn't think there was any imperceptible meaning behind his gaze. It was unusual, but it wasn't aberrant, was it? She definitely just overthought. It was a strange feeling, because she had never required to overthink about Sasuke, at least until now. Which is why all the weirder.</p><p>"Yeah, he was the one with the idea," said Hinata, unknowing the reason of her saying it, "I've told you I was curious about the place, so when he brought me there, I was pleased."</p><p>Sasuke remembered a couple days before Hinata—as her head facing the store complex and a hand raised to touch the passenger's window—had told her interest to try the new barbecue place, right behind the traffic light on the right side of the street. He took a look at the place at the time—twenty or so seconds remaining of the red light—and could imagine the place clearly in his mind even now. Pleased she said. As much as Sasuke wanted to ask if she was pleased because of the food or the company, he just nodded in response and opened his laptop to divert from further questioning. He really needed to work on his minor thesis and no distraction is permitted.</p><p>But Hinata didn't stop. She wanted to tell him everything; what she felt about the whole lunch experience. "I was pleased," she repeated. "Or I thought I should've been pleased. The food was delish. His company was enjoyable. But.."</p><p>Sasuke turned his attention to her now, anticipating her to continue. But she seemed to try pinpoint her feelings in words with difficulty. His heart raced in anticipation and he felt weird. In a sudden Sasuke felt breathless, concurrently realizing he was holding his breath.</p><p>"I mean, I should've been pleased, right?" She said at last, gazing him questioningly. The same look only mirrored to her. Why would he know about what she felt?<br/>In the end, the conversation lied dormant as they focused on their own concerns at hand; minor thesis, homework, and incoming exams. As realization hit him belatedly, he inwardly cursed. He would need to buy onigiri again if ever Hinata decided not to have lunch with him.</p><p>The question about <em>donburi</em> shop was left unanswered.</p><hr/><p>His usually composed student tapped his feet restlessly on the tiled floor. Professor Hatake couldn't help but notice as Sasuke kept glancing at the clock multiple times. The professor was skimming the draft his student had brought for only about ten minutes—hadn't even reached midway. For the years he'd had experienced in the field of obstetrics and gynecology, studying the Uchiha's approach on carcinoma mammae in males was amusing in the most refreshing way possible. That was why the previous day—after a surprisingly engaging discussion—he asked Sasuke to meet him in person as soon he finish the first draft, all the while anticipating a spirited discussion with this particular student. Being in the field for so long, not much spiked any interest in him anymore. Thus, having Sasuke as his student in charge was an inspiriting treat. What he didin't expect was, it would be as soon as today. It neared lunch time, alright. Sasuke had waited forty minutes or so to meet him due to a meeting on short notice. It wasn't his fault, yet he felt bad.</p><p>Hatake put down the draft to his desk. Eyeing Sasuke as he wondered what would it be to make him this restless? His gaze met the barely concealed accusing stare. He could already tell there is no promising heated discussion. Whatever the cause, Sasuke was in a hurry and he didn't even bother hiding it.</p><p>"What?" Sasuke quirked an eyebrow. Why would he wasted the time on staring at him? Professor Hatake had all the time to read the whole draft as he'd had worked hard the night before but staring at him.</p><p>"Let's see," Hatake started, "here's my email." He extracted a business card from the holder and put it on the table. "Send the file to me and I'll write you back."</p><p>"Thank you." Sasuke grabbed the card and fled instantly.</p><p>Hatake shook his head in awe. As amusement gleamed within his eyes, he smirked. Indeed, geniuses had a tendency to have flaw in social mannerism. At least the brat knew how to say thank you.</p><hr/><p>The library was usually practically empty nearing lunch, as the majority of students made their leave to eat. In the swift window of blares—chairs being pushed back, chatters on what to eat, rushed steps to ensure making a return in time—Hinata penned distractedly on the lavender colored notebook. People need to be more considerate in using library as public accommodation, really. Lunch time wasn't an excuse, she mused.</p><p>"What?" familiar voice startling her.</p><p>She must have voiced her thought aloud. Glancing up, she merely shook her head.</p><p>"Hungry yet?" Sasuke asked after catching his breath in the slightest. Hinata didn't seem to notice his state of dyspnea. Good. It was strangely a relief seeing her still seated on the site where he'd left her. He felt oddly anxious about the idea of her leaving him for lunch the whole walk—brisk walk with jogs in between—towards the library. After the experience yesterday, he wasn't feeling fond of eating <em>onigiri</em> for today. Not that he didn't like <em>onigiri</em>, he just wanted to eat another thing. Anything but <em>onigiri.</em> Anything but eating <em>alone</em> without Hinata. At least for today. It was only normal if he say he was overreacting. Now that he thought about it thoroughly, he never really eat without Hinata. They are the typical medical students that only have school hours in their schedule, after school hours were left to be spent studying by themselves and most of the time they went straight to their apartment. So yesterday experience was new to him. Hinata was one of the few constant things in his packed-with-essentials life. He couldn't bring himself to tell the "<em>word</em>" that kept flickering in his mind and felt like he was having a battle with his own subconsciousness. He felt unsettled that it upset him.</p><p>He was <em>traumatised</em>. Shiver ran through his spine at the thought.</p><p>"You?" she asked back. It was her way of telling him she didn't really want to eat whether she was hungry or not without having to answer him. She was clever in avoiding awkward moments, he gave her that. That was why he felt it weird for Hinata to be sporadically awkward to new people—her group mate, her professor, or even delivery man. The Hinata he knew was comfortable with her own shell. Cleverly picked words to say and deeds to do for him to feel at ease. She was the type to go along with anything yet she would be the one to act if she needed to. It was one of the reasons why Sasuke valued her as a friend. The things between them were never reaching the threshold of unpleasant level. Sasuke realized their threshold was low—though he admitted his was even lower than hers. The difference between them though was that Sasuke always deliberately show his unpleasantness whereas Hinata never—but her badly concealed subtle antics told everything.</p><p>As much as he wanted to know the menu in the <em>donburi</em> shop, he couldn't help but he really got a great craving on pasta. Thanks to Hatake's meal earlier the day that was brought by a janitor to his office as Sasuke exiting the place. It was lasagna and the aroma struck his vibrissae. All the visual and olfaction stimulated his hypothalamus and he found himself starving. "Let's eat."</p><p>"Alright." Hinata tidied her belongings and put everything inside her shoulder bag.</p><hr/><p>"Should we stay for a coffee?" Hinata asked as she put her bottle of mineral water—completing her lunch.</p><p>"Sure, caramel macchiato?" Sasuke stood up and waited for her affirmation before walking toward the cashier.</p><p>Nodding to her usual order, she moved their eating utensils to adjacent table to make a space for their work place. After dabbing the scattered liquid stains with paper towels and confirming it to be adequate, she opened her laptop atop the table—searching through the files of their incoming exam materials.</p><p>Minutes later, Sasuke walked back with caramel macchiato and iced americano on his right and left hand respectively. They ate lunch in their usual place for studying out. Aside from the adequately tasty and reasonably priced pasta, they served good coffee and provided free wifi too so all the convenient. Stay for a coffee for them meant let's-study-or-do-our-assignments-cause-at-home-I'll-most-likely-sleep-and-be-anything-but-unproductive.</p><p>Silence ensued as they focused on their own and infrequently sipped their coffee. Occasionally asking and answering each other inquiries about the things they'd forgotten despite having them memorized a day before. Sometimes they just knew the memory was there, but it was blurred or submerged and difficult to rescue somehow. So far, nothing unusual to be anticipated.</p><p>Until, a drastic turn to one of Sasuke's point of life that would be remembered for the rest of his life. All it needed was a trigger.</p><p>"What is the Tanner's stage 4 again?" Hinata asked with eyes shut in concentration. She was in the episode of trying to recollect from her erratic excuse of a mind. "For breast," she added, giving up on the idea of her remembering.</p><p>"Double scoop," Sasuke answered effortlessly. The growing nipple and areola make projections that resembled double scoop of mounds, hence the term.</p><p>"Absolutely," said Hinata as she sighed in despair. "How one could possibly memorize breast development, immaculately at that, without having one?"</p><p>He knew she was trying to tease. Despite the urge to chuckle, he only smirked in response. "Sometimes I wonder if you remember at all that even males have the particular paired organs."</p><p>"Well, at least you <em>boys</em> don't have to <em>endure</em> the changing to a pair of loaded masses. If only you look more into what I've said which is what I actually meant."</p><p>So she was playing the victim here. He would willingly comply. "Despite that, even males have the risk to develop carcinoma mammae."</p><p>"Which is," Hinata wouldn't stop either, would she? "why you need to find out why on your minor thesis. Breast is your daily routine now, it would be surprising if you couldn't answer then, thank you."</p><p>Sasuke couldn't believe this girl. He grumbled a chuckle just enough for her to notice. "Any other advice, Hyuuga?"</p><p>The lilac tinted eyes gleamed in amusement. She was just enjoying their <em>argument</em> as much as he was. "Don't make me remind you how you were tasked with that particular topic of your minor thesis!"</p><p>She even went such length to play dirty. Just as Sasuke opened his mouth for a retort, she interrupted him. "Let's put a halt here, Sasuke." Not without laughing warmly.</p><p>Knowing she surrendered for good, Sasuke shook his head and while doing so her chest came into view. He unconsciously stayed his glance there. <em>A pair of loaded masses</em> she'd said. Is that what the girls thought about their breast? Despite the oversized knitted sweater she wore today, he could still make up the shape of her breasts. As a twenty year-old male, he had already known for sometime that aside from their physiological role to breastfeed infants, breast are infamously known to be a form of pleasure during or before coitus. As indifferent as he was, he was still a boy entering the time of high fertility—due to the hormones doing. It was physiological. Been studying about female reproductive system for the past three months, he had carved to his memory any details of vulval, vaginal, and everything about female reproductive anatomy. He was<em> indeed</em> curious about the so-called enjoyment other boys had been talking about in a hushed voice—but still could be heard effortlessly nonetheless—in between classes. He simply wasn't <em>that intrigued</em> in experiencing them himself. All the studies in the past two years and a half had had his mind occupied for good. Ironically, it became the one to introduce him about this foreign feeling of desire that had been stayed dormant.</p><p>At least until now.</p><p>This conversation—although had ended—definitely had taken a dangerous turn on his behalf.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>hy·poth·e·sis</p><p>a supposition or proposed explanation made on the basis of limited evidence as a starting point for further investigation</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>For the past two days, Hinata hadn't met Sasuke in school except for lunch. It was either their class finished differently or each had an appointment with their professor in charge for minor thesis. Despite that, Sasuke always made her have lunch with him, even though they would need to wait each other. Hinata didn't really mind until yesterday when she had an appointment with Professor Kurenai that lasted longer than she had anticipated, Sasuke had waited in the library for her to finish her appointment that unfortunately ended at two in the afternoon. She could notice he was famished and even looked upset—albeit hardly discernible. Even if she was right—which she confidently was—he didn't mention any of it, even just the fact that she was late let alone complain. So she felt obliged to tell him if this would happen again in the future, he could have lunch first without her but he kept on forcing to do otherwise. Hinata felt it was nonsensical, but the urgency in his voice had had her relinquished to whatever he desire and whatever the reason was.</p><p>Despite the closest to weekends, Friday was the busiest in Konoha Medical School. As she was descending the stairs to the ground floor—where the library was located, her phone vibrated for the umpteenth time today. She had already known it would be Sasuke texting her to ensure if she had finished her class. The changes she—yet again—noticed for the past week, Sasuke had texted her more frequently—in the slightest way possible, and as strangely as it may seemed, in the particular affair associated with 'lunch'. But the purpose of her meeting Sasuke now wasn't even about lunch! They had eaten lunch together earlier, now Sasuke had waited her to go home. Sasuke wasn't one to easily pester on things let alone small things as lunch—or even going home as of now, but then again, the so called tight schedule in the third year of medical school could really put some people on edge. That was the most logical option she could think of. The missing cord though, normally Sasuke wasn't one of those some people.</p><p>When she was entering the library though, she couldn't hide the fact that she was slightly surprised to find Sasuke was with Sakura. She thought he was alone if he got the time to text her that frequent.</p><p>Noticing her slight shock that must had shown in her eyes, Sakura felt the need to explain her presence. "We were solving problems the tutor gave us. I'm in the same group with him this semester."</p><p>Of course. Feeling guilty, Hinata immediately softened her expression with a smile and nodded before pulling a chair opposite them awkwardly.</p><p>Was she jealous? Sakura inevitably wondered. After put in the same group as Sasuke twice, she had observed him to be always with this particular girl anywhere aside from group classes as they were apparently never assigned in the same group. Despite the circumstances, they always seemed to find each other no matter what. It was inevitable to think they were in a relationship right? Or they could be siblings, possible, but not necessarily likely. Not that she liked to meddle into others' lives, but their, what was it—behavior? Habit?, was indeed conspicuous—even if they clearly didn't intend to.</p><p>"Hinata, right?" she decided to try her luck at the last moment—a little too late in breaking the rather awkward silence.</p><p>Evidently surprised, Hinata said, "Yes.." then felt compelled to add, "Sakura?"</p><p>They never had class together so it must be Sasuke who had told her. Sakura nodded casually. "Yeah, I was already once in the same group with your boyfriend before this semester."</p><p>The bait was successfully initiated.</p><p>"B-boyfriend?" Hinata stuttered with raw shock. Then it hit her. It was Sasuke that she meant.. right?</p><p>Although eyes visibly focused on his laptop screen, Sasuke found himself following the whole conversation. Boyfriend she said? In spite of being definitely incorrect, he didn't feel obliged to correct her.. just because he simply didn't care. They could have all the assumptions in the world and he couldn't care less.</p><p>"No-No," Hinata stuttered her answer at last, "we aren't like that.."</p><p>Sakura looked like someone who just aced an anatomy quiz even though she hadn't completely memorized the whole study material. So he wasn't her boyfriend. And when she said it that way, that is certain they weren't siblings either. Then what could be possible to explain their situation?</p><p>"Really?" said Sakura, showing her utmost look of shock, "I mean.. you are always together."</p><p>"Yeah, it-it was because we share—"</p><p>"We are friends since high school," said Sasuke silencing both with the sudden involvement. That almost went out of hand.</p><p>They actually knew anyone would notice them to be always together, thanks to the nature of human being to be curious—bunch of medical students at that! They didn't really make too much friends, just acquaintances in their own class he might say. They were never needed too, only the two of them were always enough. It had been proved for the past two years and a half. Not to mention they weren't ones to easily converse to strangers, hence they never got the chance to tell anyone they share an apartment together. Not that he would tell anyone about them sharing an apartment—the news would certainly made them the school trending topic at once. Up to the present, others only knew the fact that they were always together—coming and exiting the bulding with Sasuke's car and have lunch everyday. Sometimes the whole truth was better kept secret. He could only shudder at the thought if people knew they shared an apartment, the subsequent questions were most likely to emerge. That only mean they are in a relationship, right? Why would they share an apartment if they aren't in a relationship? People just didn't have the tendency to shut it, didn't they? They would be pressured—in the most casually college student way but still demanding—to hold a semiformal conference to clarify any assumptions hence telling everybody the background story of how they share an apartment in the first place. It would be extremely tiresome to escape.</p><p>So they really assumed them to be in a relationship. It never occurred—let alone bothered—to Hinata before how they saw them until now. Now that she thought about it, it was only normal for them because indeed they never reasoned themselves, and as much things were quiet superficially, any assumptions were prone to appear. It troubled her now that she was in the wake of knowing they were assumed–and marked most likely—as boyfriend and girlfriend. And when she almost spill their secret out of not realizing that her answer would only add the fuel to the already blazing gossip, she felt relieved when Sasuke voiced out. It was the perfect answer—though still didn't answer entirely. She didn't know how Sasuke felt about the recent fact they discovered today really. But by looking at his ever composed attitude and response, they were indeed friends from high school after all.</p><p>Escaping from being noticed by Hinata, Sasuke glanced at her multiple times and reckoned she was in deep thought. With pale eyes staring at the spotless table, brows furrowed in a not so trivial way, and fingers ever twiddling, she was indeed in deep thought. Was she taking it more extensively than he initially thought she would? As for him, it actually irked him more than he let on to believe. Was this what people had been thinking of them? He knew he shouldn't let what others think about him interfering his life, he never did. It felt odd that what others think seemingly mattered to him now.</p><p>If he was in deep thought before, all was interrupted by Sakura's voice. "Sasuke, better fill that one from the previous reference."</p><p>Glancing at Hinata for the last time, he nodded. "Would it be fine to wait for another thirty minutes?" Now deliberately looking at her.</p><p>"Take your time," said Hinata and started to study herself.</p><hr/><p>His subconsciousness completely took control over his body as he drove to their apartment building. His aware part of brain cells were in a state of endless wandering. Pondering in circles on what had happened to him within the last week. All the sudden alterations in his life had struck him continuously that he felt a tad bit overwhelmed. That is if overwhelmed was the right word to articulate what he really felt right now. He wondered if his windshield shared the same feelings as the heavy rain rattling on it ruthlessly.</p><p>Despite the heavy rain outside, all sounds are sealed outside by the thick invisible shield of internal silence. Both were visibly deep in thought and weren't aware of the occurring silence. Even after they had arrived, it took more than a few seconds for them to finally aware of their familiar surrounding.</p><p>"Sa-"</p><p>"Hi-"</p><p>Silence.</p><p>It was Sasuke first that broke the silence this time, out of irritation more to himself than anything. "What?"</p><p>With eyes still staring ahead, "Nothing.." Hinata answered tentatively, "Do you want to say something?"</p><p>He shook his head tersely. Seeing he didn't move to unfasten his seatbelt, Hinata took the initiation to unfasten hers. "I'll go first, then."</p><p>As Sasuke didn't turn his head to look into her direction, he could hear the sound of unclasping and rustling before she opened the passenger door. He watched her back as she entered the entrance door in the basement parking of their apartment building, feeling a slight twinge in his heart when she disappeared behind the door. What had happened to him? As he couldn't come up with any acceptable answer, he sighed and unfastened himself and removed the car keys before proceeding to the entrance door.</p><p>The walk was vague, he wasn't even aware taking the lift until a sudden ding forced him out of reverie—informing he had arrived to his intended floor. Opening his apartment front door, he look over the interior. It was evidently empty, though he knew better after staring at her closed door.</p><p>Taking the last glance of her still closed door, he closed his own.</p><hr/><p>After went to bed at three in the morning, it would only be fair that on the Saturday morning Sasuke woke up at eleven. Despite both working on each of their piles of homeworks and studies in the dining table and went to bed at three, last night passed by excruciatingly slow. It would be better if one of them did their task in their own room, alas, they had never gotten their own desks inside their room, for the purpose of saving cash and indeed they had never needed to. Not when the living room was way more spacious and they couldn't stand studying in a crammed room (of their room) for long hours—well almost everyone couldn't. Studying alone was suffocating sometimes, there was no need to aggravate the situation.</p><p>Feeling his throat dry and slightly hungry, Sasuke went out of his room only to meet a disheveled looking Hinata—drinking something from her lavender painted mug. Well, disheveled might a little bit too overestimate her usual state as of now. What he was looking right now was her usual morning on the weekends appearance, just different from her usual prepped appearances at school. If before he never bothered to give more than side glances, now Sasuke took the time for a long look at her. The significant changes he first noticed was her hair, the usual long indigo tresses were now tied in a loose bun visibly with some unruly strands of hair that framed her face from the sides. The next thing was her outfit. Unlike the usual smart casual attire, now she was wearing an oversized off white sweat shirt and a pair of mauve colored shorts. He had seen her in that sweat shirt a couple times before, but not until now did he notice how the collar hung low on her neck that he could see the superficial protusion of both her clavicles and her right shoulder girdle. And when she turned and faced the side of where he was standing, he noted her face was bare without any make up, yet her lips still had the color of rosy pink. How he wondered now where were all these thoughts before that he had never noticed it, but even in this state, she looked undoubtedly attractive.</p><p>"Want some milk? Coffee?" Hinata greeted, cutting him out of his musing.</p><p>Turning his gaze to her lilac tinted eyes, he had never felt the difficulty of turning away until now. "Coffee with milk," said Sasuke and managed a smirk at last, still looking at her eyes.</p><p>As if giving him a declaration to the shifted feelings in his behalf, Hinata held his gaze and smiled, with a slight lift of an eyebrow. "Okay, I'll make you one."</p><p>Their gaze only ended when she turned to face the shelves and took out a mug. His mug—navy colored with light grey cats painting, the one she got for his nineteenth birthday. She said the mug reminded her of his house when she first saw it. Strangely, he did too. His house was filled with cats; his mother loved them, his father cared for them, and his brother played with them everytime he got the chance. To Sasuke, their cats were always an essential part of his life, having born with them already there and grew with them.</p><p>It was actually silly, the idea of individual possession of a mug. But it was a nice and considerate gift nonetheless, and he always used the mug to drink ever since.</p><p>Watching Hinata made him coffee, he plodded to the dining table.</p><p>"Let's make something good for dinner," said Hinata as she put his mug on the table and sat opposite him.</p><p>"Sure," Sasuke answered, pulling the mug closer to him. Then he remembered briefly about the awkwardness yesterday. He admitted he'd felt awkward. He couldn't be certain if Hinata shared the same notion. He was certain though, they deserved a good meal to put things back the way they usually did. "shabu-shabu?"</p><p>Still sipping her own drink, Hinata nodded eagerly. "Sounds good! Let's have lunch out then grocery shopping?"</p><p>He nodded. Despite both hands enclosing his own warm mug, he watched as she put her mug to see what she was drinking.</p><p>"Okay!" she said enthusiastically and started to walk toward her room. "I'm going to take a shower and prepare myself."</p><p>Despite the mug was already empty, from the smear of white liqud inside the mug, he could tell it was milk.</p><p>She always drink milk first thing in the morning.</p><p>Smiling, Sasuke sipped on his coffee and immediately frowned.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>calor (heat)</p><p>one of the five cardinal signs of inflammation</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>The grocery store was almost empty despite being the earlier days of the month. The weather was warmer and the majority of passerby had changed into lighter clothes. As it neared to the end of spring, it could only mean one thing for the both of them; exams were getting near. With the haunting thought in his mind, grocery shopping actually could be a diversion especially for days like this. However, grocery shopping had always been a pleasure for Hinata. She was the type to eagerly pushing trolley from row to row to find—aside the things from their grocery list—anything that had come to mind or anything interesting at all.</p><p>As he was walking beside the ever smiling Hinata, Sasuke took notice of their surrounding. Despite almost empty at the moment, he could make out most of the buyers came as couples; they would hug in between picking the grocery, hold hands as they push the trolley together, or whisper sweet nothings to their significant other while smiling. He had never thought grocery shopping, in spite of being a public activity, could be somehow, intimate. Unconsciously, he looked at the girl next to him, currently on her tiptoes trying to reach the paper towel. Significantly a head taller than her height, he impulsively reached for the paper towel from behind her. He wasn't entirely aware what he was doing until he smelled the scent he was familiar with—the scent of their apartment—coming from her hair or her as a whole. It was something between rose and citrus..? He had never noticed their room freshener or mopping liquid products before, they were Hinata's pick, definitely. Having full grasp of what he was actually doing right now, he immediately put the paper towels to the trolley before looking away. He could hear her saying a soft thank you.</p><p>There was no certainty if the couples around them were all actual couples. There was no certainty either if they weren't, just like how he and Hinata weren't. Superficially speaking, they might looked like one.</p><p>"Would you want to try the new cereal?" asked Hinata, eyeing the new product stalls.</p><p>"Sure," he said, picking one box with the drawing of round shaped cereals on the cover.</p><p>"Should we buy bread?"</p><p>Nodding, he answered, "We should."</p><p>Tapping her chin with index finger, she scanned the trolley's content. "Are these all?"</p><p>Sasuke almost nodded when he suddenly remembered the thing she'd said before entering the lift of their apartment building. "Didn't you say you almost run out of toothpaste?"</p><p>Eyes widened in realization, Hinata nodded. "True!" She slapped him by the shoulder playfully. "What can I do without you?"</p><p>Stifling a chuckle, Sasuke shook his head until he subconsciously remembered his lunch issue; he could almost feel his cheeks threatening to burn. <em>What can I do without you?</em></p><p>Last month, the toothpaste shelves were two rows away, it wasn't the case now though. Hinata led the way as she read the hung tags row by row and Sasuke followed with sufficient gap behind—all the while sustaining his earlier observation.</p><p>"Okay, done, now the ingredients for <em>shabu-shabuu</em>."</p><p>Her beaming made him turn to her—gazing at her back. With hair so long it reached the small of her back, Sasuke wondered how would it feel like on his hands?</p><p>He must be losing his mind.</p><p>"—you think?"</p><p>It was crystal clear that Hinata had said something and she even asked for his opinion. He couldn't really admit he wasn't listening because he was thinking about her, couldn't he? Now, what should he do?</p><p>"You weren't listening." Sasuke imagined as he watched her back, Hinata was pouting teasingly.</p><p>It was such a relief how attentive Hinata was. "I," Sasuke paused, there was no point to deny the tangible fact, "weren't."</p><p>"Actually," Hinata started again all the while comparing on what to choose on the vegetables stall, "Gaara has invited me.. for dinner."</p><p>Been thinking about those relationship ideas since yesterday (thanks to Sakura), Sasuke hadn't ever thought about Gaara at all. If he thought about the whole thing in systematically approach, it was, as a matter of fact, Gaara that had started the talk about relationship between him and Hinata—indirectly of course. Whereas, the mere mention of relationship hadn't even surfaced between them since forever. It was Hinata that had the potential to start a relationship with.. Gaara. Him pondering in silence must have looked like he waited for her to continue, because it was what followed.</p><p>"I don't really want to go though."</p><p>Strangely, it eased him even though he didn't register the fact that he even feel uneasy before. "Really?" it almost came as a croak, "why?"</p><p>Hinata turned her head to him, making her tresses rippled. For a moment she glanced all over her sight to find him, until they locked eyes. "I just don't, is it weird?"</p><p>It wasn't. "So?"</p><p>"Well, how should I reject the invitation?"</p><p>"Just tell him you don't want to go."</p><p>"Shouldn't I tell the reason?"</p><p>Sasuke pondered on that. If he was in Gaara's shoes, would he want an explanation? He would but he really wouldn't. Telling the reason would mean she really couldn't make it to the dinner so maybe another time. Not telling the reason though would mean she wasn't interested and if Gaara caught the signal, he wouldn't invite her again in the future. Unless he was resilient and that would be later to be revealed.</p><p>"It is for you to decide, telling or not telling,"</p><p>"I know right?" Hinata smiled, satisfied with his answer. She moved to a different stall now.</p><p>She only asked his objective opinion and didn't intend him to have a part in her decision. That didn't answer his curiosity. "Will you tell him or not?"</p><p>"I told him I can't, period."</p><p>Sasuke smiled so instantly he didn't have time to suppress it. Looking at her back—relieved she wasn't facing him—he let loose, until he perceived the reality. She<em> really</em> wasn't interested in relationship. It shouldn't troubled him, seeing it was what it had been since forever, yet it did now. It didn't take long for the smile to turn into a thin line.</p><p>"I <em>really</em> just want to study with you," said Hinata with a chuckle.</p><p>He felt better nonetheless.</p><hr/><p>After closing the front door of their apartment, they placed the paper bags on the counter and put the foods that need to be stayed chilled inside the refrigerator. Deciding they should take a shower first before cooking dinner, there Sasuke sat on the edge of his bed with white towel over his damp hair all the while scrolling through his phone. Checking on his email, he opened the most recent inbox from Konoha Medical School. He'd expected much the email would contain something he had anticipated..and feared? Just by reading the subject he felt his heart rate raced.</p><p>Hearing the sound of door being opened behind his wall, he immediately got up to open his.</p><p>"Hinata, the schedule's up."</p><p>"I know," came a shaky reply. "Oh my God, I'm so nervous."</p><p>"Yeah," Sasuke looked up from his phone screen before trailing off.</p><p>Her hair was wrapped in a light blue towel, framing her anxious face; biting her lower lip and brows furrowing. She was wearing the black t-shirt he'd given her for her twentieth birthday; a t-shirt with heart anatomy, complete with its pointer lines, printed on the chest area. It was the t-shirt he'd found while surfing online store and decided to order for himself but then remembered it was almost for her birthday that he ordered her the same design (his was white colored) at the last moment. Not until she wore it for the first time that they both realized he'd ordered the same size as his. It was undeniably too big for her, but she accepted it contentedly just the same. Her wearing the shirt wasn't even a new sight, yet he felt different now. Moreover, despite the shirt being loose to her petite body, he could effortlessly make out the shape of her breast. His parasympathetic reflex was quick to catch the visual signal. <em>Damn</em>, it felt slightly tight down there in a sudden.</p><p>Reaching the towel over his head to dry his hair—an attempt to distract himself, Sasuke walked toward the dining table. "Me too."</p><p>Eyes still down looking at her phone screen, she sat opposite Sasuke. "It-it will start on the last week of May."</p><p>"We still have time," Sasuke said reassuringly, "to make the most of it."</p><p>"It's only two weeks preparation.."</p><p>"A little over two weeks."</p><p>Hinata looked up to him, smiling nervously. "You're right."</p><p>Nodding, Sasuke continued, "we've studied a lot too."</p><p>"Thank you, Sasuke." She looked genuinely grateful. Every exams week she would often have episodes of anxiety and he had accustomed to them. Although most of the time his words were practically hollow, no promises to be true whatsoever, at least they'd calmed her enough when it happened.</p><p>He gave a curt smile. "Shall we start cooking dinner?"</p><p>"Ah, I'll brush my hair first, could you retrieve the ingredients from the fridge?"</p><p>"Sure." Sasuke placed his towel on the back of the chair before he proceeded.</p><p>Minutes later, Hinata walked out of her door, already with no towel visible and hair half-dried fell straight to her back. "I wonder if other universities will start summer break at the same time we do?"</p><p>Turning the knob of the stove, Sasuke looked up to gaze the wall in front of him. "We can ask Naruto?" A statement he voiced in a querying tone.</p><p>"Ah, you're right," Hinata said in mild surprise as if it hadn't arised in her mind before. "Why are you always right?"</p><p>"My name is Uchiha Sasuke, you're welcome," said Sasuke smugly, smirking though he knew Hinata couldn't see it.</p><p>Hinata laughed heartfully.</p><p>The idea of him smiling over his own joke—or her laugh—was bizarre. If his heart could smile, it was the closest to what he was feeling right now, probably. He felt a comfortable warmth gradually spreading to his chest. Or it could be the steam from the boiling broth doing.</p><p>"Let's video call him! Right after dinner, before studying."</p><p>"Good idea," replied Sasuke, putting the beef to the broth and adjusting the stove to medium heat. "Haven't heard from him for two months?"</p><p>"That long? I guess third year is really something."</p><p>Sasuke scoffed. <em>Indeed.</em></p><p>"I'll put the chopped vegetables. You can text him, Sasuke."</p><p>Nodding and washing his hands on the sink, Sasuke walked to the dining table for his phone.</p><hr/><p>Now comfortably full and contented, Sasuke watched as Hinata adjusted her laptop atop the table as they sat cross-legged on the microfiber rug. After the second ring, Naruto wide grinning face came into view.</p><p>"Hey, Naruto!" greeted Hinata, smiling herself.</p><p>"God, how long has it been?" came his exuberant reply.</p><p>"Two months, idiot," Sasuke joining in, "how are you?"</p><p>"Damn, have I told you about the endless projects demanded by my professors this year? One of my friends, actually had—"</p><p>As Naruto continued his college life story, they listened to him thoroughly. Hinata's laugh would be heard in between his jokes and Sasuke would scoff or smirk at Naruto's attempt to joke. They had probably never reckoned how they could be good friends; Naruto being the quarrelsome and ignorant yet considerate when required, Sasuke the apathetic and arrogant but observant all the time, and Hinata was timid and awkward yet attentive in every occasion. With all the conflicting differences they had, they complemented each other.</p><p>"So, when are you going home, Naruto?" queried Hinata.</p><p>Naruto eyes moved higher from his camera—looking into something. "Oi, Shikamaru, when is summer break?" Or someone.</p><p>"Next week." Came a distant reply. Strangely, the laziness lingered was apparent.</p><p>Naruto focusing his eyes on the camera again, grinning. "You heard him. How about you two?"</p><p>"No fair! You have extra one week ahead of us," said Hinata.</p><p>"Naruto, when are you planning to continue this?" came the same voice seemingly belong to Shikamaru.</p><p>"Okay, guys, before he kick me out, I guess, see you at the end of the month?"</p><p>"See you."</p><p>"See you, Naruto!"</p><p>Then Hinata's screen went blank. "He seemed.. busy."</p><p>"He did," Sasuke said blankly. "I'll go fetch my laptop."</p><p>With her laptop on both hands, Hinata moved to the dining table. She sat on one of the chairs just as Sasuke opened his door carrying his laptop. He sat opposite her.</p><p>Looking through his recent files, he opened Pathologic Basis of Disease all the way to cervical cancer section.</p><p>It started as something that'd come to his mind, a normal thing as a medical student. It started as normal as it could.</p><p>"Are you HPV vaccinated?" he voiced, genuinely curious. HPV was one vicious virus, but infections—that frequently lead to malignancy—could be prevented.</p><p>Hinata looked up to him, visibly startled. "Yes, why?"</p><p>"Just something that came up in mind," he said, pointing to his screen, "I'm reading on cervical cancer."</p><p>"I see.." Her words hung as if Hinata still wanted to continue and nibbled her bottom lip nervously. Sasuke stared at her, waiting. "I guess unprotected sex is inevitable sometimes.. particularly for long-time spouses, right?"</p><p>He wouldn't ever thought in his life would he hear the particular query out of her. Masking his mild surprise, Sasuke replied stoically. "Yeah, I guess."</p><p>As a medical student, it really wasn't a sensitive matter. Apparently, it was now to him. It probably wasn't to Hinata seeing that she didn't stop.</p><p>"Do condoms really affect the pleasure substantially that people prefer not using them?"</p><p>
  <em>Why, Hinata?</em>
</p><p>He gulped inaudibly. "I wouldn't know," he said, almost feeling sweat was dripping at the back of his neck.</p><p>"You need to experience it yourself, I guess," Hinata said and laughed sheepishly.</p><p>"Yeah.." That was sweat for sure. Sasuke reflexively rub the spot with his left palm.</p><p>"Have you ever..?"</p><p>Why would she ask the obvious? "I'm with you almost 24/7, you should have known."</p><p>She exhaled. He could almost swear her sigh was out of relief. "I know, but who knows, boys?"</p><p>"How about <em>girls</em>?"</p><p>"I believe we are more conservative.."</p><p>"Whatever."</p><p>"Don't you want to?"</p><p>Either she was just curious or she just wanted to corner him—which wasn't really her—both were successful. He couldn't seem to turn her down. Well, he started it, he was to blame.</p><p>"That's.. unquestionable."</p><p>"All the studies keep your mind out of it?"</p><p>"Most of the times. Are you interviewing me?" He managed a forced smirk.</p><p>"I'm just curious.. that's all."</p><p>Still locking their eyes, he waited. He was planning to blink before turning his eyes from her. Just after he blinked, she continued. "How about you?"</p><p>He quirked an eyebrow.</p><p>"Vaccine, I mean."</p><p>"Likewise."</p><p>Nodding slowly in silence, Hinata turned her eyes to her laptop screen. "You should date, Sasuke," she said at last.</p><p>Sasuke laughed dryly. "I think I should."</p><p>Staring blankly on his laptop screen, he pondered a little longer. He could only think about one person to date at the moment and the very person tangibly indicated she wasn't interested. Moreover, what if these feelings he was having were just lust due to curiosity? He knew he couldn't ever forgive himself if his friendship with Hinata was threatened just because of 'these' selfish desire.</p><p>He allowed his subconscious urge to look at her. The prior warmth over his chest gradually returned. Only, there wasn't any steam. There was only Hinata and she looked so beautiful.</p><hr/><p>The next two weeks were flickering in a blur. Both were so engrossed on themselves there was no room for extra thoughts, already bothered enough by the incoming exams. Studying clinical examination was the best, they could still laugh over silly mistakes to relieve the tension just a bit. They would switch equally as doctor and patient and Hinata kept stuttering between the procedures while Sasuke kept forgetting to allow privacy for the patient. Something unexpected happened though while they were practicing on breast examination. As Sasuke got the first turn, he talked endlessly from introducing himself to concluding the results and letting the patient know the necessaries all the while imagining in his mind doing the inspection and palpation to the patient's breast (focusing in difficulty not to think about Hinata's but everytime she laughed to what she was going to reply him as a standardized patient he kept on losing his focus). When it was Hinata's turn though, she subsconsiously—it had to be—letting herself to touch supposedly Sasuke's breast; practicing the motion, crucial location, and the interpretations. Sasuke was too embarrassed to collect himself for a dispute and Hinata was too concentrated that he didn't have the heart to distract her.</p><p>The exams week was felt unearthly long, day by day they underwent the frustrating night before, the tense morning, and a happier after exam before replaced by the haunting tomorrow exam. On the last day of the exams, Sasuke got the earlier session so he finished early and waited for Hinata in the library. Despite relieved by his own satisfying result, he waited anxiously for Hinata to enter the library all the while reading something about bioethics.</p><p>There was hardly anyone in the library so it wasn't difficult to hear light footsteps approaching him. Looking up from the book, Sasuke absorbed the image of Hinata standing in front of him; her lips were wrinkled in an attempt to suppress her smile as her fingers lightly tracing lines on the back of the chair.</p><p>"How did you do?" asked Hinata, now smiling openly.</p><p>Knowing Hinata asking first was a good sign, Sasuke smirked. "I bet still better than you did."</p><p>Hinata laughed softly. "I can't believe this semester has finally ended!" she said.</p><p>Standing up, Sasuke said, "Let's leave this place for good."</p><p>"Agreed, though I still have minor thesis appointment tomorrow," said Hinata, chuckling darkly. Her eyes followed Sasuke as he made his way to her. Finally reaching her, they walked toward the exit.</p><p>"I do too, apparently," said Sasuke, "when do you plan on going home?"</p><p>"The day after tomorrow then," said Hinata then added, "probably."</p><p>Knowing their schedule was compatible, Sasuke nodded. "Me too, then."</p><p>Widening her eyes, Hinata finally registered where this was going; Sasuke was planning their trip to home just like what they'd been doing every holiday. This exact holiday though, her cousin had asked her to accompany him since it would be the first time their scheduled going home was aligned. In the pre-clinical years, Neji was committed to social events and would always come home later than her. Now that he was a clinical student, he'd reduced his extracurricular activities to allow more time to study.</p><p>"Hmm, Sasuke," Hinata started as Sasuke turned to her, "actually Neji's asked me to accompany him this year."</p><p>"Aa, I see," said Sasuke. He looked stoic, Hinata couldn't discern it clearly if he was disappointed or not. "You never got the chance before."</p><p>"Yes, it'll be the last holiday before Neji finishes his clinical year."</p><p>Finally reaching Sasuke's parked car, Hinata glanced at him as if wanting to say another thing.</p><p>"You can join us, if you want," said Hinata.</p><p>"No, it's fine. I'll need the car back home," said Sasuke. "Let's go home first."</p><p>Nodding and smiling, Hinata opened the passenger door and brought herself in. <em>Yes, let's go home first.</em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Interesting facts : HPV Infection</p><p>You can skip this definitely, I just thought I need to clear things up because I mentioned HPV in this chapter lol</p><p>HPV : Human papillomavirus</p><p>HPV is a virus that infect your epithelial cells (either mucosa or skin depends on its subtype). It's also a STI (sex transmitted infection), that's why condoms are a way to prevent transmission during intercourse. The high-risk subtype of HPV infection can progress to cervical cancer, that's why, vaccination is important! Although it is also rare for infection in males to progress into malignancy, they still could transmit the virus into their partner, and certainly that is not wanted.</p><p>In conclusion, both our main characters here are safe to 'do' it without protection :)</p><p>Pregnancy though, that is a different case.</p><p>OK done, stay safe you all!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>cor·ti·cal a·rou·sal</p><p>activation of the reticular formation of the brain that increases wakefulness, vigilance, muscle tone, heart rate, and minute ventilation</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>Neji waited patiently as someone behind the door twisted the knob audibly and deliberately slowly at that. The door moved inward to conceal Uchiha Sasuke, with his arrogant demeanor ever present. Crossing arms over his chest, Neji surpressed the urge to raise an eyebrow.</p><p>"Well, won't you let me in?" asked Neji locking his eyes to Sasuke's dark ones.</p><p>Sasuke's smirk only grew and he didn't step aside.</p><p>"Neji, is that you?" They could hear Hinata's voice distinctly.</p><p>"This flatmate of yours won't let me in, Hinata," shouted Neji over Sasuke's shoulder.</p><p>"Sasuke!"</p><p>Breaking their staring contest, both laughed over their idotic greeting habit. Stepping aside, Sasuke let Neji entered his apartment and closed the door.</p><p>"You come early," said Sasuke.</p><p>Ignoring his remark Neji said, "It wasn't there before." Pointing at the tall bookcase on one of the corners near the gliding patio door of the balcony.</p><p>"Hinata wanted one, I thought why not so we bought one online," said Sasuke, eyeing the bookcase. "Want a drink?"</p><p>"No, we should be going by now," said Neji, sinking himself on the couch. "What is she doing now?" he asked, eyeing her wide opened door.</p><p>"Arranging stuff," said Sasuke, shrugging.</p><p>As if hearing their conversation, Hinata's voice came from behind the wall. "I'll be ready in 10 minutes!"</p><p>Neji nodded subsconsiously as he watched Sasuke entering his own room. Letting his eyes wander about the room, Neji took notice of what had been added, moved, or removed altogether since his last visit. He didn't visit this apartment her cousin had called second home that often, thrice a year would probably cover the average of his visits and from every visit, he'd noticed, he always found changes. It could be as little as if the bin is full or empty, as simply as the additions in cooking utensils or pile of snacks on the counter, or as great and noticeable changes like how the rug had changed in color and the most recent he'd found today, the new bookcase. The atmosphere the apartment gave was like one warm space one could say as a home. It felt like anyone living here, put their mind into it to make this apartment their living space for as long as they could. He wondered what would be wandering about inside their heads as they did so.</p><p>One thing that never changed, he noticed, was the scent lingered in the air coming—definitely—from the mopping or air freshener products. It was always the smell of cheap citrus.</p><p>His eyes settled on the new bookcase on his left, observing the books neatly lined next to each other on the shelves. Reading the title one to another from its spine, he could make out the medicine essentials (Moore's Anatomy, Junqueira Histology, Guyton and Hall Physiology, and more others) and some fiction reads from famous authors. As his eyes found their way to the last book, he noticed the two inches lilac labelling on the spine to the majority of the books; Hinata's books dominated the space provided by the bookcase.</p><p>Hearing steps approaching him from the direction of Sasuke's room, Neji turned his head to find Sasuke removing his backpack and placing it atop the dining table.</p><p>"This is Hinata's," said Neji confidently, pointing the bookcase—again.</p><p>Sasuke looked at him funny. "What? No, we split in half while purchasing," replied Sasuke matter-of-factly. <em>This apartment isn't Hinata's only, isn't that obvious?</em></p><p>Neji shook his head absent-mindedly, disagreeing, his long dark hair swaying slightly.</p><p>"How do you survive med-school with hair that long?" asked Sasuke, genuinely curious.</p><p>Neji looked at him funny. "Top knot and wear wig at school." Duh, it was obvious.</p><p>"Why not just<em> cut</em> it?"</p><p>"Why would <em>you</em> care?"</p><p>Sasuke stared at him like he'd just grown a second head. Neji was planning for a retort until Hinata appeared—carrying a cabin sized luggage.</p><p>"Okay, let's go home!" cheered Hinata.</p><hr/><p>Gazing on the passing fields and trees lining the highway, Hinata caught the sight of black Corolla Altis with Sasuke's plate number speeding up ahead from behind.</p><p>"It's Sasuke!" yelped Hinata, instinctively pointing the car with her index finger.</p><p>Neji glanced at the car pointed while still maintaining focus on the road. "Yeah, I guess."</p><p>"He drives too fast."</p><p>"He <em>drives</em> fast," he scoffed.</p><p>Frowning, Hinata turned to him. "How did you know?"</p><p>"We hang out sometime during high school."</p><p>Turning her eyes to the disappearing black car, Hinata leaned fully to her seat and sighed. "He never drives fast with me," said Hinata.</p><p>Giving her side glances, Neji cleared his throat. "How is living with him?"</p><p>"He is.. helpful. On doing chores, cooking, and studying particularly."</p><p>"Good, then," Neji said, nodding, "I was afraid he would make you do all the chores."</p><p>Hinata giggled. "No way!"</p><p>The rest of the road was in silence. Hinata's mind travelled back to what had occurred within the past semester. When they first found out they weren't assigned—yet again—in the same group; when they registered the proposed topic for their minor thesis (they both had fallen asleep on the due hour leaving them the topics unselected by other students, the two topics were about the male carcinoma mammae and the pattern of neurological disorders. Hinata knew Sasuke—though he didn't hate it—had put reproductive system as his least favorite. She also didn't really mind about the particular topic, despite focusing on males' medical record. But Hinata had always wanted her minor thesis to be about neurology—having a neurosurgeon father had a big role to this preference—and it was certainly a big relief when she found out there was still unselected one. Sasuke had always known too. Without giving any further comments, he submitted his topic selection right in front of her eyes while she was still contemplating on how to negotiate with Sasuke—leaving her no choice but to pick neurology department. Though feeling apologetic, she was really grateful); when she decided to have a lunch with Gaara (she thought it would be fun to have lunch with other beside Sasuke, yet she couldn't stop thinking where and what Sasuke eat and craved to tell him the things popped in her mind she didn't feel comfortable enough telling Gaara); when Gaara'd invited her again for a dinner, though not feeling eager, she'd contemplated to agree, until Sasuke'd asked her to study on that night. She immediately told Gaara she couldn't); then it went to the conversation with Sakura. The thought had resurfaced multiple times inside her mind sporadically in between her studies for exam. What was so wrong about always together? About living together? Platonically at that. Every time she thought about it again, she became more and more dejected particularly when she recalled how Sasuke'd interrupted her. Why couldn't they tell anyone they were living together?</p><p>"What would you think of a girl and a guy living together?" asked Hinata absently before added, "platonically."</p><p>It took a long seconds for Neji to finally answer. "You've always been with Sasuke."</p><p>"I mean.. in general."</p><p>"If it weren't you both, it'd be peculiar, indeed."</p><p>"And we aren't?" asked Hinata, trying her best to conceal her testing tone.</p><p>"Particularly if they aren't in a relationship, but it'd be acceptable if they are strangers renting a flat share," Neji deadpanned.</p><p>Hearing no answer from Hinata, Neji chuckled darkly. "What? You want me to say otherwise?"</p><p>"Of course not," said Hinata rather too fast. Though she didn't know if she was telling the truth or not.</p><p>Sensing the developing tension, Neji offered her to switch with him, if she'd like.</p><p>"Are you sure?" asked Hinata timidly.</p><p>"I am sure and you should also."</p><p>"Alright, then."</p><p>Nodding in approval, he pulled over.</p><hr/><p>The middle-aged woman was making breakfast when she noticed her son—in a workout attire—descended the stairs. "Running with the Hyuugas?"</p><p>"Yes," said Sasuke, pouring water to a glass.</p><p>"How are they?" asked Mikoto, accustomed to rejections coming from her son if she mentioned breakfast before he exercise.</p><p>Sasuke gulped a whole glass in one go before saying, "Fine." He took a banana from the counter and start eating it.</p><p>"Mr. Hyuuga still busy at the hospital?"</p><p>"Yeah, he cares for his patients more than his family," Sasuke adjudged.</p><p>Her long dark hair swayed when she turned her head for a better view of her son. Her lovely—despite grumpy most of the time—son. Being a neighbor and apparently best friend to one of the Hyuugas, she noticed, Sasuke'd become more comfortable in expressing his thoughts. She knew her son was observant even since birth, but he was too apathetic to express his observations into words, until he befriended with the Hyuuga girl. Though, sometimes, she must admit, his opinions were rather too honest and a little bit too harsh.</p><p>"You probably never thought why he was like that. Losing someone you loved…well, I wouldn't even want to imagine."</p><p>Her son didn't answer right away. He might be contemplating what his mother had just told him. Since they'd moved to this neighborhood a little to six years ago, the Hyuugas were in anguish after Mrs. Hyuuga had died not a week prior. It was obviously awkward, moving in while their neighbors were shutting themselves from the world. It was even more awkward to pay for condolences when the Uchihas didn't even know the family member who had died. It took them long enough to get to know each other as neighbors, and only until Sasuke and Hinata started to study together that they had reached a new level of knowing the neighbor. All they knew, the Hyuuga surgeon drove to the hospital even before Mikoto started to make breakfast and went home after she and her husband had stayed up late for a glass of wine or two. Hinata was the only mediator for the Uchihas to really know about the Hyuugas. She was a sweet girl, gifted by a pretty face and keeping her hair long to complement her feature, and really polite too.</p><p>"You're right, Mother. I was ignorant," her son said at last, right hand playing with the emptied glass.</p><p>He was more attentive too, she noticed. Mikoto smiled, feeling content of her son improvement in social attitude. Hinata was a good influence. Never did she regret agreeing to her son asking to share an apartment with this particular girl. Though it wasn't entirely unexpected, she'd been startled when he told her his plan. She'd thought she was in the blind of something starting.. like if they'd started dating or the like. She'd risen a hope only to be disappointed by his son next words ("we are friends, study buddies, whatever"). Friends, study buddies, or whatever his son had regarded of Hinata, she really wanted to know the girl better, and the other two young adult Hyuugas would be a bonus. They are neighbors after all.</p><p>"Should we invite them over for dinner?"</p><p>She had made up her mind in case her son found it too troublesome and disagree. It felt too easy to be true when he merely agreed.</p><p>"I'll ask them," said Sasuke as he strode toward the foyer, "I'm taking off."</p><p>Mikoto smiled as she heard the front door being opened and closed softly.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke was spooning his last bite of lunch toward his mouth when Mikoto suddenly called his name.</p><p>"I'm thinking of cooking something western," said Mikoto, eyes glinted with anticipation, "how is that?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded appreciatingly as he put the spoon down. "Nothing with shrimp and crabs. Also not chopped tomato, use tomato only for the sauce."</p><p>"Why? You like tomato."</p><p>Sasuke grimaced, as if what he had to say next was some uncanny truth. "Hinata doesn't like eating tomato when she knows it is tomato. She is fine unless it holds its texture. She is weird."</p><p>What a nice way to know the revelation coming from his son.</p><p>"Hmm, is it fine with you if I make something with no tomato at all?"</p><p>"Everything you cook is delicious," said Sasuke.</p><p>The way he'd said it so indifferently would make people assume he was being sarcastic. Not when you're his mother though; Sasuke was telling his honest opinion.</p><p>"Now, now, you compliment me too easy, don't you, honey?"</p><p>The left side of his lips raised. "It's the truth."</p><p>Mikoto stood and walked toward the sink and patted Sasuke's raven hair midway. "After finishing your lunch, help me?"</p><p>He nodded before spooning the last bite he'd almost forgotten.</p><hr/><p>They decided to make medium grilled steak with potato wedges as the main course, and banoffee pie as the dessert (the easiest when you could easily find the ingredients at home). "I hope these are fine."</p><p>"They'll appreciate it," said Sasuke, buttoning his light grey shirt and looking at the clock simultaneously. "They should be here any minute now."</p><p>As if in cue, the bell rang. Sasuke reflexively strode toward the door without finishing his previous doing—leaving the first two unbottoned. Opening the door, the first—though even until he brushed his teeth later the night, the rest of the guests were completely forgotten—he registered was Hinata, dressed in an ombre navy clothing, the hem of the georgette sash dress stopped just above her knee. The sleeves reached below her elbows and the neckline exposed just a modest bit of her cleavage. She wore light make up; a hint of blush on both cheeks and lips were tinted red the shade of a grapefruit.</p><p>She was really pretty.</p><p>She was really pretty he utterly forgot how to move to let them in.</p><p>"Umm, Sasuke?" asked Hinata tentatively while holding a pan of Japanese cheesecake.</p><p>After mentally slamming his brain to regain control of his body, he immediately stepped aside. "Come in."</p><p>It was a miracle his voice didn't fail him.</p><p>The Hyuugas made their way inside and were welcomed by his mom on the entrance of the living room. Eyes lit up and smile gracing her refined face when she saw the cheesecake. "Darling, Hinata, you made this yourself?"</p><p>Hinata nodded demurely. "I hope you'll like it." She knew Sasuke wouldn't.</p><p>"My my, I love cheesecake. I'll try forcing them on the boys!"</p><p>Hinata smiled back and chuckled. "You don't have to, Uchiha-san."</p><p>Still the smile adorning her face, Mikoto looked over to the other two Hyuugas. "Hello, the clinical student and the youngest of the family."</p><p>Even Neji couldn't help but smile. "Uchiha-san," greeted Neji as he bowed, "nice to see you."</p><p>"Likewise! Come on in, I hope you are all hungry."</p><p>Sasuke stayed behind as he watched the three Hyuugas and his mom made their way to the dining room. Mikoto placed the cheesecake on the counter before sitting at the first seat on the left side of the dining table as Hinata sit opposite her, followed by Hanabi and Neji. Sasuke sat beside his mom.</p><p>"Good, now everyone is seated, let's eat," said Mikoto. She took a small bite, swallowed, before started a conversation, it's what dinner is all about anyway.</p><p>Before she even thought of how to start, however, she –with everyone in the room apparently —was startled to have the timid girl starting the talk first.</p><p>"It's only us, Uchiha-san?" asked Hinata.</p><p>"Oh yes, my bad for forgetting to tell you. My husband and Itachi are in a business trip, tomorrow is the last day, I suppose, and the next day they shall head home."</p><p>Pale eyes or hers widened, before saying, "you were alone before we were home?"</p><p>"It's alright," replied Mikoto with a small chuckle, "my boys are taking care of their lives."</p><p>"I thought I was imagining things..," Hinata murmured absently. Finally noticing everyone was waiting for her to explain, she said in a normal tone, "Sasuke was restless when he knew you were alone."</p><p>"He did, didn't he?" Mikoto glanced at her son. "Did he tell you I was alone?"</p><p>"I didn't," said Sasuke, locking his eyes to her pale ones before Hinata turned away in self-consciousness and shoved a big chunk of meat to her mouth.</p><p>Mikoto nodded in amusement, with her graceful smile ever present. "How was third year treating you, Hinata?"</p><p>The girl in question visibly looked startled. She reached for her glass and immediately gulped a mouthful of water. Sasuke had to bow his head to hide the smirk arising on his lips. <em>Why do you have to be so adorable.</em></p><p>"It's..," Hinata paused trying to find the right word—or swallowing, "manageable, I guess." She smiled before adding, "thanks to Sasuke."</p><p>"Ah, you give my son too much credit."</p><p>"He deserves all the credit, Uchiha-san," said Hinata, her smile grew.</p><p>Mikoto looked at his son, he was obviously taken aback. Uchiha Mikoto was amused. "Really, honey?"</p><p>Sasuke averted his eyes from everyone, the half devoured steak on his plate was his center of focus. "You're helping too," muttered Sasuke.</p><p>Releasing her boy away, Mikoto turned her eyes to the only other boy in the room and started interviewing the already sweating boy—blame the heat of the summer.</p><p>"So, Neji.."</p><p>The conversation ran even more effortlessly, with steadily timed questions and adequate answers. The main course was indeed delicious; the meat was juicy, the potato was baked with rich herbs, and the Hyuugas seemed to enjoy the meal. The Japanese cheesecake was a surprise, so the banoffee pie was put back on the fridge for later need. Hinata volunteered to slice the cake and made her way to the counter. Mikoto watched with amusement as Sasuke stood up from his seat.</p><p>"I'll help," said Sasuke before following Hinata toward the counter.</p><p>Thanks to her son, this little dinner couldn't get any better.</p><p>Mikoto could see it clearly the way his son replied to Hinata's little talks with gleam in his eyes. Even if his help wasn't actually needed, he stayed beside her comfortably as he leaned his weight to the counter with one hand. His eyes would move from her working hands to her face—and lingered there—before back to her hands. My, my, did her son know the way he looked at Hinata now? Were his mind clouded or clear as the day of his own feeling? She was sure to find out after this.</p><p>Well, at least he helped distributing the cake.</p><p>"Hmm, just the perfect sweetness and texture," commented Mikoto, feeling the cake melted inside her mouth. "Do you bake often, Hinata?"</p><p>Even she could guarantee Sasuke was enjoying the cake.. and he wasn't one to like anything sweet. Either it was indeed the perfect level of sweetness—even for Sasuke—or he was enjoying gazing at Hinata while he seemed to move his oral muscle absently.</p><p>"I'm glad you like it," said Hinata with a smile. "I don't actually. The things I bake are usually too much for all of us and we've had thrown the leftover too much already."</p><p>"Ah, I see, happens to me too," said Mikoto, nodding. "Why don't we bake, then?"</p><p>"You're too kind, Uchiha-san," said Hinata, blushing prettily.</p><p>"Don't worry your pretty head, I'll have Sasuke to inform you what can we do or if you have any idea, that is, make Sasuke tell me."</p><p>"Thank you, Uchiha-san." Hinata smiled again. She was sure to smile a lot, wasn't she? What a pretty, polite, and pleasant girl. <em>Good one, Sasuke.</em></p><p>"Does he help you doing chores?"</p><p>Hinata looked startled—or irritated? in the most subtle Hinata way, like she was tired of having been asked the same question in every conversation.</p><p>"Don't worry, Uchiha-san. He always does and we divide the chores fairly."</p><p>Mikoto was sure to be taken aback. "Well, he—"</p><p>"I'm washing the dishes," said Sasuke, interrupting her mother, before standing up.</p><p>
  <em>He is always reluctant to help me.</em>
</p><p>The next day and days to come, Sasuke always helped Mikoto doing chores without further ado.</p><hr/><p>The dinner ran smoothly and even better than she'd dared to imagine. The conversation was pleasant and she could say she know the three young adult Hyuugas better. And amusing too, on certain parts. Overall, it was more than decent and the Hyuugas went home at nine.</p><p>"I really like Hinata, you know?" Mikoto asked, watching her son did the dishes.</p><p>Sasuke involuntarily stopped his movement for a split second, taken aback by his mother's sudden notion. "She is courteous," he said after regaining composure.</p><p>"Of all things, she is courteous?" Mikoto gave a graceful laugh. "What do you <em>really</em> think of her?"</p><p>Mikoto watched as Sasuke put the last dish on the rack before removing the red rubber gloves. Despite having been done with his work, he still faced the sink, giving her mother his back; Mikoto couldn't see his expression.</p><p>"She is..," Sasuke murmured, lost on what to say first. "She acts differently to people she first meet and to people she just know a ten minutes before," he started again, more confident this time. "She sees the world in a different way I'd been viewing and she is sure to make me know this. She sets goals and will try her hardest on achieving them."</p><p>Sasuke pivoted, facing his mother. Eyes staring at the same dark ones of his mother's intently. "She wakes me up everyday, she always decides the meal, she always reminds me to do the laundry, she makes me coffee, she always pesters me to work on my minor thesis," he gave the slightest laugh before stopping in fear of saying too much. In the midst of silence, his mother waited patiently all the while giving him encouraging gaze. Something in his mind just fell into place.</p><p>"She is always there," he continued in a murmur.</p><p>Mikoto smiled. "You sure observed her well, didn't you?"</p><p>The left side of his lips quirked into a lopsided smile. "I sure did."</p><p>"Not caught up in the fog anymore, aren't we?" Mikoto asked softly.</p><p>At first Sasuke couldn't decipher what his mother was trying to imply, she gazed at him like any loving mother would do, waiting patiently for him to finally grasp it.</p><p>Widening his eyes in realization, his lips parted in recognition.</p><p>
  <em>I think I really do too.</em>
</p><hr/><p>The day after tomorrow, Sasuke sat on the couch in front of the television as he heard giggles, small steps, and clanking of utensils from the kitchen. Hinata was coming over to make something with his mother, he'd heard something like crêpe cake? Mille crêpe cake? Whatever it was, despite inviting Hinata to 'bake' something, his mother had wanted to make a cake that wasn't needed any baking. The recipe needed to be put in the fridge for approximately two hours for better slicing and tasting, hence Hinata sat next to him after she finished piling all the layers with his mother, while his mother went out to meet some friends.</p><p>Sasuke was reminiscing the great Christopher Nolan's movies, the first movie ending credits had started rolling when Hinata appeared from the kitchen. He could readily play another one.</p><p>"I'm watching Nolan's work, any preference?" asked Sasuke.</p><p>"Hmm, I've watched everything."</p><p>"It is worth the second time."</p><p>Hinata wasn't convinced. "I've been wanting to watch something..," mused Hinata as she moved to sit on the floor, visibly feeling hot. It was unbelievably hot outside, the only savior in his house was the buzzing electric fan. Sitting on the couch granted Hinata the exclusive blow of the fan more than sitting on the couch.</p><p>Hinata pulled her hair to one side, leaving her neck bare. "It's a series, detective of sort. Interested?"</p><p>"Sure," replied Sasuke.</p><p>So they watched the first episode of C. B. Strike series. It was engaging alright, particularly in Hinata's part. As for Sasuke though, not so much, extremely so when starting the second episode. Staring at droplets of sweat at the back of her neck was.. something he found himself more appealing. He wondered why Hinata wasn't bothered to wipe them, leaving the droplets intact.</p><p>Deeming her sweat was an insult to his usually focused brain—and if he stayed any longer he could involuntarily wipe them himself—he decided to follow Hinata sitting on the floor to save him from the view of her neck.</p><p>Now though, halfway in the second episode, Sasuke found himself hard to focus on the tricky plot. His new center of focus was Hinata's face; now that he had the access to stare. He found himself differentiate every shift of her expression; from frowning in concentration, grimacing in anticipation, sighing in relief, to smiling at the revelation. He could easily make out the whole plot from reading her expression why bother watching it himself?</p><p>From the whole two episodes they'd watched, he concluded, he liked it best when she smiled.</p><p>Even better when she turned her head to face him, smiling in satisfaction of the second episode.</p><p>Her lips looked so soft. The rosy hue was really tempting.</p><p>He realized, she wasn't smiling anymore. Her lips parted—in bewilderment, probably. <em>But, why?</em></p><p>Now he could notice the vermilion border of her lips was of a shade darker. Odd, he could even notice the faint lines on her bottom lip.</p><p>Wait.</p><p>He abruptly turned his gaze to her eyes—which was apparently only two inches away he found it difficult to focus.</p><p>He had been leaning in toward Hinata, he'd realized it now. He didn't even want to find out if she had been too or not. He felt really hot and it wasn't even because of the summer.</p><p>He abruptly distanced himself before standing up. "I need to go to the bathroom."</p><p>And he left.</p><hr/><p>He had tried to kiss her.</p><p>It was obvious.</p><p>Her heart rate raced.</p><p>It was also obvious.</p><p>She wasn't even leaning away. <em>Why?</em></p><p>Maybe she was curious?</p><p>She was curious to kiss, yes. But, never did she thought of kissing Sasuke in her life before.</p><p>Until.. now.</p><p>And why did he try to kiss her in the first place? They were always known to be platonic! (known to a very few close friends and relatives). She had been satisfied with how their friendship had been. She believed Sasuke shared the same feeling. Just.. what had happened?</p><p>They couldn't risk their already harmonious friendship that needed years of constant presence of each other, couldn't they?</p><p>It feared her to imagine if things go the down way and they parted—literally cutting ties—in the future. She wasn't going to let that happen. They needed prevention measure.</p><p>Prevention meant to never acknowledge any alteration.</p><p>What Sasuke did was a mistake. A mistake to be forgotten.</p><p>The next fifteen minutes or so—that felt like a lifetime—Sasuke exited the bathroom and sat on the couch. Hinata turned to face him, she smiled as if nothing ever happened.</p><hr/><p>Tapping his fingers on the wheel, Sasuke watched as Hinata—dressed in a cream shirt with long sleeves rolled to the elbows matched with knee length royal purple skirt—appeared behind the front door of her house. Her hair was loose behind her swaying slightly as the wind blew. Smiling at the sight of his car, she quickly closed the door and made her way to him. As much as he preferred to, Sasuke couldn't turn his gaze away from her.</p><p>Today was the start of the second week they were home for the holiday. After one enough week of family time (and neighbors time for Sasuke and Hinata), the three of them (with Naruto) decided to hang out. It was Naruto's turn to treat and they drove to Ichiraku's Ramen—all time Naruto's favorite.</p><p>They'd always had the habit to have one treat the other two in a rolling manner. The last time they hung out was Hinata's turn, today was Naruto's, and the next time (if they decided to in the near future) would be Sasuke's turn and rolled back to Hinata and on. It'd made them to anticipate every meeting plan; knowing they wouldn't need to spend any cash or simply repay the others. It all started two years ago, when Sasuke'd treated them for his birthday, the next time they ate out Hinata had offered to treat saying it'd be nice to anticipate their planned meeting in the hope of staying in touch because everyone was obliged to come. The other two agreed at once.</p><p>Arriving at the Ichiraku's, the dark of Sasuke's eyes wander about to find Naruto. Naruto had texted ten minutes before he'd arrived and already seated in a table of four near the cashier. Feeling a soft tug on his sleeve, Sasuke eyed the hand on the sleeve of his shirt before looking at the owner as Hinata motioned with her index finger to a grinning Naruto.</p><p>Walking toward the table, Sasuke contemplated on where to sit. Either beside or across from Naruto. If he was being honest, he much preferred facing Hinata. Facing Naruto while he stuffed himself with ramen wasn't really a good sight. If he was to sit opposite of Naruto, it was either Hinata choose to sit next to him or Naruto, and he could only face her if she was next to Naruto. Which he didn't really feel good about it and why he'd asked himself that too and couldn't—or wouldn't find any answer. But if he chose to sit next to Naruto, Hinata would either sit opposite him or Naruto, either way he was facing at her. The idea of Hinata sitting opposite of Naruto didn't sound so good either.</p><p>He mentally screamed. Could he just stop to overthink? Dear God.</p><p>Sasuke sat next to Naruto, frowning.</p><p>Hinata sat opposite him. He felt.. fulfilled.</p><p>He wanted to smile so bad but it would look weird. He frowned even more.</p><p>"Look at you two," greeted Naruto, "been living and coming together and all since forever like some kind of twins."</p><p>Hinata giggled and Sasuke was unaffected; he was too focused on maintaining the frown from changing into a smile.</p><p>"You're both like the living evidence of ideal friendship between boy and girl. You know what they say if you are thinking of kissing each other and you're fine with it, that will mark the end of your friendship." Then Naruto added, "I can't really see us kissing each other." He stuck out his tongue in disgust.</p><p>Sasuke imagined him kissing Hinata. It clearly wasn't disgust he was feeling. He even wanted it—clearly his last contact with Hinata proved it all.</p><p>He froze, dark eyes staying on the table, before glancing up to see the reaction coming from the girl opposite him.</p><p>Hinata giggled nervously. Catching his eyes staring, she immediately looked away.</p><p>He realized Hinata wasn't on the same page.</p><p>He wasn't even entirely sure about his feeling, it could be only lust. Either way, he didn't want to risk ruining their friendship.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>re·flex</p><p>an action that is performed as a response to a stimulus and without conscious thought</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>The sun in the last third of July beamed shyly just above the horizon, saturating the atmosphere in a pink hue of after dawn. Sasuke was tying his shoelace when a knock of his door was heard. After finishing the knot in a hurried manner, he jogged to open the door.</p><p>Expecting three Hyuugas, he was met with only Hinata.</p><p>Hinata smiled ruefully. "Neji stayed late last night. Hanabi wasn't feeling it."</p><p>Sasuke blinked and nodded before stepping out of the threshold.</p><p>"Wait," said Hinata, startling him, "I have something for you."</p><p>"Here, open it," she said as she offered him a palm-length cube packaging to which Sasuke simply took.</p><p>"I haven't seen you with them on while studying lately," Hinata continued hesitantly as Sasuke tore the kraft paper wrapping. "Figured you lost it and needed one."</p><p>What lied beneath the wrapping were two boxes of earphones; one apparently custom made, while the other a pair of commercial wireless one. Both shared the same shade of black.</p><p>"Surprise, I got you two sets," said Hinata happily, "Happy Birthday, Sasuke."</p><p>Dark eyes secured to the two sets of earphones on his hands. He utterly didn't know what to respond. This was unexpected.. seeing he'd just registered he hadn't been wearing one lately, as what Hinata had noted. Hinata was always present near him enough to know the fact that earphones had been an essential in his daily hustles; he could only listening to music with earphones on and he could only –persistently—studying with music on.</p><p>Or so he thought.</p><p>Something—<em>someone</em>—had definitely occupied his mind profoundly he wasn't in his right mind. He impossibly forgot his <em>damn</em> earphones whereabouts.</p><p>And thanks to that, he legitimately needed one.</p><p>"Thanks, I needed them," he said, facing her in the eyes this time, wherein he instantly regretted. It was that satisfaction smile again from the C. B. Strike series. The very smile that had him almost kiss—</p><p>"Wait a moment," he said, turning away. "I'm gonna put this inside."</p><p>"Sure thing." Sasuke heard her say, wasn't aware if she was still smiling or not. He wasn't interested to find out.</p><p>Coming back to Hinata in the next minute, he closed the door behind and started to jog with her. They stopped at the nearest corner to execute their usual stretch.</p><p>"Neji has to leave the house early," said Hinata, pulling one knee close to her chest. "It will be next week. Poor clinical student."</p><p>Sasuke was reaching the ground with the tip of his fingers, bending over. He tilted his head for a better view of Hinata; catching only the sight of her high ponytail.</p><p>"Good thing I drove my car here then."</p><p>Hinata smiled. "Agreed."</p><hr/><p>The familiar fields lining yet again the familiar highway came into view. The radio buzzed, losing its signal. A hand reached out to adjust into music mode; the sound of soft rhythmic guitar filling the inside of the car, greatly appreciated by the two occupants.</p><p>Hinata sighed. "I've always loved this song."</p><p>Sasuke nodded. "Same."</p><p>A soft humming soon followed. Sasuke glanced at his passenger; she was smiling contentedly. Forcing himself to gaze on the road ahead, he let loose and smiled.</p><p>"The schedule's up, the group list's also up," informed Hinata, scrolling through her phone.</p><p>Sasuke risked a glance. "Hmm."</p><p>"The usual schedule and.. you are in Group 11." Hinata released a disappointed sigh. "We were never assigned in the same group! Why is that? Do the staffs have something against us?" she chuckled darkly.</p><p>If he was being honest, he was disappointed too.. slightly.</p><p>"If we are though, can you imagine? It'd be significantly convenient for us."</p><p>
  <em>Indeed.</em>
</p><p>Hearing no response from him, Hinata perceived his silence the wrong way. She eyed the hands on the wheels as she tried to correct herself. "Not that I'm complaining.. we've been fine until now. But it—"</p><p>"I understand."</p><p>Lilac tinted eyes snapped to his visible side, searching through the dark eyes that were forced to gaze up ahead only to find herself failing.</p><p>He was disappointed. It'd be an obvious lie to say otherwise.</p><p>But he'd set an aim for the time being. It'd be <em>convenient</em> to him this way.</p><p>And he wasn't planning to lose.</p><hr/><p>After a normal first day of the new semester, now the day after, Sasuke plodded down the corridor after his previous class. He'd pondered long since a brunette doctor entered his class to set a trial for himself started today. All through the class, he could only hear faint sounds of the group discussion, but aware enough to know the topic for the week was preventive care for pregnancy. His mind was adamantly elsewhere.</p><p>He'd been tempted to touch his phone a lot to see if any message had been sent, which wasn't the case as his phone hadn't vibrated once since the morning. Facing ahead on the far end of the corridor, he could make out the library entrance. And despite showing an indifferent façade to anyone cared enough to notice his presence, his inner self was a turbulent coil of nerves that worsened with every step he took.</p><p>A vibrate inside the pocket of his trousers alerted him.</p><p>He subsconsciously sighed out of relief.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>It's already lunch time. Your class haven't ended yet?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>It took Hinata long enough to finally texted him. Of course, he knew how much longer it would take for him to finish whatever errands he had for the day, she'd patiently wait. It was just Hinata being Hinata.</p><p>He actually felt a slight twinge of guilt for not contacting her sooner. For making her wait. He could only have his undetermined thoughts to blame. Taking a last glance to the library entrance, he typed his message.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>I have some errands, I'll probably eat whatever on the way. Is it fine if you go home by yourself?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>Sasuke braced himself after another vibration.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>OK</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>He sighed, and not out of relief. Turning around, he let his feet go anywhere they would take him.</p><p>After wandering about with his feet and car, he finally opened the door of his apartment not before sunset. He met the usual sight; a typing Hinata on the dining table.</p><p>"Oh, you're back."</p><p>Sasuke nodded.</p><p>"Have dinner yet?" asked Hinata with a smile. <em>Why does she have to be smiling?</em></p><p>Sasuke turned away and unconsciously scratched the back of his neck. "I'm planning to make ramen."</p><p>"Take a shower, I'll make you one. I've been wanting ramen too."</p><p>He watched her stand and help herself with a pot and two packages of instant ramen. Why did she have to make things difficult for him?</p><p>Exiting his room after a brief shower, her eyes fell to the sight of Hinata's back on their kitchen. She was cutting something and when she put the thing on the pot with clasped hands did he finally register them to be vegetables. Turning off the stove, she grasped the pot holders and brought the flavorful scented ramen to the dining table—which had been set for two people eating.</p><p>He pulled a chair parallel to the side of his room and sat down. They ate in silence—comfortable silence. It was only ramen with some vegetables, but it was the most delicious ramen he ever had. And Sasuke couldn't help on wanting more nights like this to come around. With him waiting for her to finish cooking, eating in the same comfortable silence, he would do the dishes and she would make small talks to accompany him. But what he couldn't seem to comprehend was the fact that those are the things they had been doing for as long as he could remember.</p><p>Yet, he wanted more.</p><p>He wanted to gaze at her freely without the fear of getting caught. He wanted to wipe the red stain of the ramen soup on one corner of her lips with his thumb. He wanted to tuck the long hair that kept getting in the way of her eating behind her ear.</p><p>He could even go more from there. He even wanted to kiss her as of now.</p><p>Inwardly thankful for himself for already finishing his meal before those striking thoughts materialized, he made his way to the sink. How long could he survive before losing to himself?</p><p>Fortunately, the next day came in handy. After getting a message from his minor thesis supervisor on the night prior, he could sigh in relief of knowing he had a real excuse for the day. Professor Hatake had invited him and another student assigned to him for a proper introduction and discussion.</p><p>Now, sitting on one chair in front of the professor's desk, he listened to the fellow student sitting next to him introducing himself and despite keeping his eyes locked on the wooden desk, he could swear he felt the intense stare from the boy.</p><p>"My name is Sai."</p><p>Sasuke waited but nothing followed.</p><p>Hatake Kakashi cleared his throat. "Hmm, have you been acquainted yet?"</p><p>"No."</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>Sasuke snapped his head to him, trying to search deep within his mind if he ever saw the boy with dark hair, dark eyes, exceptionally pale complexion—</p><p>"Just kidding, of course."</p><p>The way he said it so flatly all the while smiling really creeped Sasuke out. Clearly, this guy named Sai wasn't someone he wanted to do anything with.</p><p>Kakashi cleared his throat again, seemingly uncomfortable. He chuckled nervously and gestured to Sasuke. "How about you introduce yourself then."</p><p>"I'm Sasuke."</p><p>Kakashi twitched. This semester surely would be extremely amusing.</p><p>The meeting ended with an advice given to the two of them to discuss further on their minor thesis, which apparently shared the same topic hence the same supervisor. Sai was dealing with the community side, in hope to obtain the community's opinion on male patients with breast cancer.</p><p>Sai clearly wasn't a social person, yet he was dealing with community. Sasuke wouldn't even want to imagine what the guy had up his sleeves to nail his minor thesis. Discussing further with him wasn't even a decent option in his opinion. He would voluntarily go to some length to avoid dealing with Sai on anything.</p><p>Definitely.</p><hr/><p>For the whole first week, Sasuke had managed to make up an excuse to come home later than Hinata. Partly he was telling the truth—an exaggerated truth, since his appointments hardly reached more than an hour. Let alone until sunset. And on the other days he didn't actually have appointments he had no choice but to lie; saying he had some '<em>errands</em>'.</p><p>Rolling to another Monday, the day of the weekly lecture in which he involuntarily had to be with Hinata the whole day, Sasuke couldn't think of anything to minimize their time under a meter proximity. And don't make him start to pinpoint how torturing the day had been for him to find watching how Hinata had managed to switch three different ink while taking notes and even managed to highlight in between the concise lectures was more engaging than actually focusing on the actual lectures.</p><p>He grudgingly had to conclude as of today it would be better to pass the day the usual way. He needed to be subtle on doing his '<em>mission</em>' after all; he couldn't risk of her finding out by making up the same excuses for the whole semester. He was cleverer than that.</p><p>After the lecture, things started to get normal and even easier for him; just like how returning to their habit would be. Having lunch in a sushi bar restaurant on the downtown, coming home in the midafternoon, showering, and sitting back to the dining table for the remaining evening to be spent studying in each other presence were carried out effortlessly.</p><p>It felt too easy.</p><p>It felt too easy he started to wonder if he'd been putting too much effort in avoiding her. If he even needed to be avoiding her in the first place.</p><p>As the clock ticking to the middle of the night, he felt his eyelids become slightly heavy. It was harder to focus on the textbook currently blaring on his laptop screen, but it was easier to glance at her concentrating form.</p><p>And <em>that</em> strand of hair kept getting in the way. She would repeatedly tuck it behind her ear after a few impossibly tolerable minutes. A strand of hair escaped yet again the security of her ear as she vigorously writing something on her notebook.</p><p>Sasuke waited thirty seconds.</p><p>One minute.</p><p>Two minutes.</p><p>And even after five minutes, she didn't do anything regarding the insulting strand of hair.</p><p>Sasuke couldn't take it anymore. He put the strand away securely behind her ear.</p><p>That's when he was reminded it couldn't be <em>that</em> easy. He was letting himself sagging more than he should be. His arm hovered between them, fingers brushing the tip of her earlobe. Hinata finally took notice of what had transpired; she stared at him with wide eyes and parted lips. And it was so damn hard to withdraw the disobeying hand.</p><p>What he did next was a brief flicker of memory until he stared blankly at the immaculate white ceiling of his bedroom. He didn't even realized he'd turned off the light, so the ceiling wasn't actually white; it was grey.</p><p>His tired mind was being in used endlessly he started to consider studying out with Sai would be the best choice he got. The <em>only</em> choice he got.</p><p>Apparently, eating <em>onigiri</em> for the whole week wasn't enough.</p><p>He didn't fall asleep until three.</p><hr/><p>The next morning was extremely awkward. Hinata, while blushing and stuttering madly, greeted him in the morning, to which he answered with a grunt. Hinata had made a grilled sandwich for breakfast, to which he'd greatly appreciate had it be on another day. Today.. he wasn't feeling it. He wanted to be separated from Hinata as soon as possible meaning entering his class and get over with.</p><p>He could feel Hinata stared at him curiously as she watched him putting the sandwich inside a paper bag.</p><p>"You-you're not eating it?" she asked tentatively.</p><p>"Not quite hungry."</p><p>Folding the upper edges into an adequate seal, he held the paper bag and made his way to the front door. "Let's go."</p><p>Hinata followed behind him hurriedly, adjusting to his uncharacteristically longer strides.</p><p>Standing inside the lift with only Hinata present and driving to school with Hinata were carried out of habit. Walking to the main entrance of the modern building with Hinata by his side was also out of habit. Now pacing to his own class with no Hinata around, he felt relieved, yet.. disgruntled.</p><p>During his class, the façade he put was as if he keenly listened to everything exchanged between his groupmates . He could make out some interesting or highlighted informations pointed out by them and some correction remarks by the brunette doctor—or she had made it to professor probably?—apart from that everything was vague. His mind traced back to the fault his guilty hand had made. The faults his body had made.</p><p>After the doctor had bid a farewell and exited the room, he lingered longer inside his class, eyeing the paper bag he'd extracted from the denim backpack slumped to the front leg of his chair. Eating the cold sandwich, which was still delicious just the same—even better, he ignored the curious stares of his groupmates. Yet, he could almost swear he can read their minds if only for a fleeting seconds.</p><p>
  <em>Why isn't he with that girlfriend of his? You mean the pretty long haired girl? What was her name again? Should we just leave him?</em>
</p><p>Clearly, those words only happened in his own mind. First, he reckoned they would assume Hinata to be his girlfriend. Second, he <em>didn't like</em> the idea of them knowing her name. Third, he <em>wanted</em> them to leave. What a pathetic excuse of an absolute subjective conception.</p><p>And don't forget how he mentioned her to be pretty.</p><p>He felt <em>more</em> disgruntled.</p><p>Even currently sitting on their usual table at the library—eyes locked absently to the spotless table—he sensed her light steps approaching him, but wasn't fully awake until she called him.</p><p>"Let's go, Sasuke."</p><p>Sasuke nodded, eyes still locked to the table, and absent-mindedly followed her to their car. <em>His car</em>, he needed to remind himself that.</p><p>Now staring at the red light, he felt a sudden rush of disbelief to himself for even accomplished driving in the first place. He subsconsciouly took side glances of Hinata and felt relief engulfed him to know they both were in one complete piece.</p><p>Turning to the usual left, Sasuke steered the car to the main lobby, instead of the usual basement parking.</p><p>Hinata stared at him quizzically. "Sasuke?"</p><p>Sasuke didn't turn to her, in fear of failing to say what had been bugging him in the head since he'd woken up for the day. "I'm dropping you off," he said, pulling it off without any emotion.</p><p>Hinata stared at him—his side, unmistakably taken aback.</p><p>"W-what? You're not coming?"</p><p>"I need to discuss minor thesis with someone from the same department."</p><p>"Ah, I see."</p><p>"I'll be home after dinner, don't wait for me."</p><p>"A-alright, b-be safe," she said, her tone crestfallen.</p><p>He heard rustling and unclasping before she exited her car. Standing on the bottom stair, Hinata waved him goodbye, to which he answered with a step on the pedal.</p><hr/><p>The discussion he didn't thought would be fruitful, turned out contradictory. Sai wasn't a social person, he was right about that. Proved rightaway when Sasuke arrived ten minutes late to their agreed place to meet; a fast food restaurant with free wifi obviously.</p><p>"Aren't we taught every second matters?"</p><p>Sasuke rolled his eyes. Well, yes, as a future doctor dealing with life and death situations every second would definitely matter. Now, that wasn't the case, wasn't it? It wasn't like Sasuke did it on purpose; there was a notable traffic on the way there from his apartment building.</p><p>Sitting opposite Sai, Sasuke pulled out his laptop and managed to open his draft. They exchanged their laptop to scan through the other's material and comment in between the paragraphs. It was Sai who commented first.</p><p>"Hmm, it's really interesting the way you formulate the background."</p><p>Sasuke glanced up from the laptop screen, noting Sai was.. earnest in reading through his draft. Fingers absently stroking his chin and brows were taut in concentration.</p><p>"But," he said, "there is some lacking on the evidence of the epidemiology."</p><p>Sasuke nodded approvingly. "I've been having trouble finding the right articles, I'll probably look more into that."</p><p>"Also, you haven't really studied about the research methods, have you?"</p><p>Sasuke smirked. "I haven't."</p><p>Scrolling Sai's draft to the research method section, Sasuke found it to be completed with all the sampling method and some formula he'd only stumbled upon once before. Amused, his smirk grew. "Well, aren't you dedicated."</p><p>Sai smirked. "I am," he said then he exchanged their laptops.</p><p>So what he had failed to discover from the first meeting was the fact that Sai was critical, and in a good way. And probably dedicated, to his minor thesis at least. They exchanged their adapted methods for selecting articles, sights on research and sampling methods (Sasuke benefited most from this discussion), and complemented their views on the reference manager they'd been using.</p><p>Overall, all the engaging discussions outweighed his social issues and Sasuke must admitted that Sai was tolerable to be associated with, or even favorable. It was only seven when they ran to a dead end, where Kakashi's qualified knowledge was needed. It was still too early to come home. Hinata must be studying—</p><p>"You're not going home?"</p><p>Sasuke blinked. "I'm staying longer."</p><p>Sai stared at him as if contemplating to say something. "I am too, actually."</p><p>If Sasuke had any question on why would Sai stay, all but answered when two girls appeared on each of his sides.</p><p>"Sasuke?" that was Sakura.</p><p>"Why are you with Sasuke, Sai?" that was some blond haired girl he didn't know about.</p><p>"We discussed things," said Sai ambiguously. "And he is staying."</p><p>Sasuke raised an eyebrow.</p><p>"You're staying to study with us?" asked Sakura as she made her way to the seat next to him.</p><p>They'd planned to study together? To some it would be an inviting proposal. To Sasuke that wasn't the case. He'd studied much to regard himself to be able to concentrate better in a quiet atmosphere. He knew for a fact Sakura wasn't quiet. As for the blond girl, she was friends with Sakura and from the way she was already sitting next to Sai and looked like she was about to kill him she might be not a quiet one either. Sai was quiet, but the three of them would probably too much.</p><p>Now, he didn't really have a choice, didn't he?</p><p>Turning his head to Sakura's direction as she sat next to him, his eyes fell upon her striking pink bag atop the table impassively.</p><p>"Yeah."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>dis·trac·tion</p><p>a thing that prevents someone from giving full attention to something else</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>Keyboards never looked this interesting until now. Her eyes traced the letters before her, ignoring the blaring screen screaming for her attention. A hand absently brushing against the keys, feeling their textures. She repeatedly circled the 'S' with a finger.</p><p>Blinking, her finger stopped on one angle of the square. She sighed.</p><p>She knew she would be like this. With no one around, Hinata couldn't maintain her concentration long enough for a one sit read. There was no diligent someone persistently writing notes in front of her. There was no light kicking on her leg when she was laughing over a distraction (funny videos on social media) when she should had been studying. There was no intimidating stares in front of her. There was no navy colored mug on the table. So many things weren't present in order for her to concentrate.</p><p>There was no Sasuke.</p><p>First, it was only lunch time. It had started as a one day thing, she'd take that. <em>Errands</em>, could happen. Then two consecutive days. Minor thesis appointment, that was inevitable. Then suddenly a whole week had passed and she had to go home with public transportations! She wasn't complaining, really. It was just strange on Sasuke's behalf. And—definitely—inconvenient on her behalf.</p><p>The second Monday of this semester, everything had turned back to normal, surprisingly. She was happy and put aside her uneasiness. Then he did the <em>thing</em> and left her there to stare his disappearing back behind his door. He didn't even turned off his laptop, didn't even wash his mug, didn't even take his notebook, he just didn't say anything or do anything to appease her or clarify anything that needs to be clarified, if there was any that is. She did everything for him. He didn't thank her on the morning after.</p><p>The next days to come he'd disappear until God knows when. She never got the chance to see his face at night. Without him, she could only suffer until midnight and went to bed obediently to the desperate command at the back of her mind. And on every morning, she never got the chance to <em>confront</em> him because now he never ate breakfast and inside the car she'd lose all her courage and remain silent. Another week passed.</p><p>Now reaching the third week, her uneasiness only worsened. Mid-semester exams were just around the corner and she couldn't fill her brain with anything ever since the start of the semester. And not just because she couldn't concentrate on the family medicine planning and everything, but for the past weeks—actually, even months—her mind kept drifting to analyze what she did wrong or why he <em>did</em> all those things.</p><p>Why he stared at her<em> longer</em> than he had ever done. Why he stared at her when she was only eating a meal. Why his eyes followed her when she approached him in the library. Why he turned away when she caught him staring. She'd been thinking she was only over sensitive and theorize things over nothing. Until he'd tried to kiss her. Until he'd touched—brushed—her (earlobe).</p><p>And what worse was the fact he chose to be a coward and didn't face her on the matter. It certainly was what she initially had wanted.. But avoiding her? He certainly carried out the matter rather excessively. Did he think she didn't know he was avoiding her? What did he take her for? An imbecile?</p><p>She'd been thinking about the reason behind the changes she'd found, or she thought she'd found. But it couldn't be what she thought it was, couldn't it? Nonetheless, they needed to talk things out. They were friends after all! Friends talk things out, right?</p><p>Talk things out then what? The fact that she dreaded what could be the answer even more was overwhelming. She just didn't know anymore. Maybe.. maybe it was better this way.</p><p>Absolutely not.</p><p>The next morning, she was determined to confront Sasuke. Steeling her mind, she twisted her knob only to see the familiar paper bag of her favorite bakery on the counter and instantly smelled the scent of cinnamon. All her determination melted into a puddle surrounding her.</p><p>She stared at the paper bag then at him who surprisingly already awake she didn't need to knock on his door.</p><p>"What?" Sasuke asked.</p><p>She shook her head. "Thank you..," she said, eyeing the paper bag in her hands.</p><p>Sasuke grunted and exited their apartment. Hinata followed.</p><p>Now, on the umpteenth evening she was sitting alone on the dining table, she was more than determined to confront him. Whenever he decided to go home, she'd wait.</p><p>Despite repeatedly getting distracted and losing focus, she'd wait.</p><p>Despite crying for wanting to sleep her suffering off, she'd wait.</p><p>He didn't come though.</p><hr/><p>A cup of coffee was shoved towards him. Not bothering to unplug his ears, Sasuke eyed the pink haired girl and nodded. Securing the paper cup with a hand, he sipped carefully on his hot coffee as his eyes returned to his laptop screen. Behind his laptop screen, he caught a glimpse of Sai and the blond haired girl—Ah, Ino, he'd found out since day one but considered her blond hair was easier to discern—were bickering over something. More like, Ino was the one to bicker and Sai seemed too comfortable to be a part of the quarrel. He seemed.. enjoying it.</p><p>Sasuke's arm was poked by the girl next to him. Averting his eyes from the bickering duo, he raised an eyebrow to Sakura. Sakura giggled and gestured him to unplug his earphone, so he did.</p><p>"Have you read about somatoform disorder?"</p><p>The truth was, he hadn't. Thinking back for the past two weeks he'd been studying with these three, he hadn't managed to perceive anything at all, aside from knowing the general concern of each topic, which couldn't be taken into account. The fact that he hadn't and was just reminded by her question, he felt slightly unnerved.</p><p>What had he achieved from studying with them? The answer was simply none. His ever plugged earphones—which of real good quality thanks to Hinata—did help masking their buoyant discussions. Taking a part into their discussion wasn't tempting at all, in the end he'd only find them bicker over trivial different interpretations. With earphones on, focusing on his laptop screen should be an easy work. But not when Sakura persistently poking him to voice his opinion (if he had any) or to simply ask him the thing she couldn't really understand when she in fact understood probably even better than he did—which was irritating. And the bickering scene behind his laptop did not help him at all if only made the matter worse.</p><p>Looking at them and his situation now, all he could feel was irritation. He couldn't ignore the fact that they were indeed irritating. Sai was tolerable when he was alone, but with them, he was irritating just the same if only more in his own way. Sasuke must repeatedly reminded himself that this was his choice, a deliberate action he'd chosen. But then Sakura asked <em>that</em> question; an innocent question that had successfully put him on edge. As much as he told himself he couldn't care less, he couldn't shake the feel of inferiority, if only just a bit. Detest would be a rather too strong word, but it was more than dislike that he felt. He didn't like the feeling one bit.</p><p>Finally shaking his head to answer her, he glanced at his phone to get an idea of the time. Thirty minutes to one in the morning; just about time to go home. He unplugged his earphone from his laptop before replugging it to his phone. After putting his belongings inside his bag, he stood.</p><p>"I'll go first," he said, ignoring perplexed stares of the three despite always going home first before them.</p><p>Hanging his backpack over a shoulder, he then took his coffee with another hand and proceeded to exit the restaurant. The evening breeze grazed his exposed hands. Staring absent-mindedly to the view before him, he watched the red leaves falling helplessly from its bony branches. It was the fourth fall he'd been living with Hinata. He wasn't quite sure how to put it, but he felt a fleeting rush of nostalgia. He remembered it clearly how excited she was when they unpacked their belongings, how frustrated she was when she couldn't decide where to put things here or there, and how she laughed at him when he didn't have any idea to install the gas stove so she did. His track of mind stopped when an image of her smiling face with her midnight hair fluttering as the wind blew appeared and overshadowed everything behind.</p><p>Smiling derisively as he sipped on his coffee, he strode to his car, inwardly laughing to himself for being utterly pathetic.</p><p>Now leaning on one side of the lift, he waited until it jingles. Stepping out from the opening lift doors, he couldn't stop from wondering if whether Hinata decided to stay awake later than usual or not. Recalling her stubborn sleepiness, he snorted in an attempt to hide his chuckle. She must be sleeping peacefully on her bed right now.</p><p>Inserting a set numbers of their password (combination of his birthday and hers consecutively for the sake of easy-to-remember), the door dinged in a familiar sound before he swung the door open.</p><p>His feet turned stiff when he perceived the sight before him; a sleeping Hinata. She was sitting on her usual chair, her head was resting on her crossed arms atop the table, her hair was sprawling all over save for her face. Her laptop and notebook were still opened on the space next to her head. There was something falling inside his chest, something solid he couldn't discern just yet.</p><p>He tried stepping closer to her and as his sight became clearer by each step he took, he could see her face was red and puffy and her cheeks were glistening. Did she cry? <em>Why?</em></p><p>He pulled a chair opposite her quietly, dreading any sound could wake her. After carefully putting his bag on the floor beside him, he sat quietly, keeping his eyes on her puffy face as he did so. He gazed at her sleeping form and could only imagine how uncomfortable it must be if only her consciousness wasn't dragged into the state of NREM sleep. She'd most likely get paresthesia if she didn't change her posture any time soon.</p><p>"Hinata," murmured Sasuke.</p><p>He waited as he noted the small detail on her face; the slight curve of her overall straight eyebrows, the long lashes over her swollen eyelids, the soft line of her round face, the small gap between her lips as she breathed, and the hair that kept getting in the way. He chuckled as he impulsively hovered a hand—stopping midway in a split second—to put away her hair.</p><p>His heart raced in anticipation as her eyes fluttered open. Sasuke withdrew his hand, somehow perplexed because it felt right.</p><p>"Ah, you're back," mumbled Hinata, rubbing her eyes.</p><p>"Yes, sleep already."</p><p>"I've been waiting for you," she mumbled as she gazed at him through half-lidded eyes.</p><p>Amused, one corner of his lips quirked into a lopsided smile. "You have?"</p><p>She didn't answer as her consciousness drifted back to sleep.</p><p>With the smile still present, Sasuke called again. "Hinata."</p><p>"Hmmm?"</p><p>"Go to bed."</p><p>"Okay."</p><p>Sasuke watched as her petite form subconsciously plodded to her room.</p><p>The smile remained.</p><hr/><p>It had become a habit apparently. After having another appointment with Kakashi, Sai asked him for a discussion—that instantly continuous with studying. Sasuke merely agreed.</p><p>Though, after hours in class—and inside Kakashi's office too, though he much preferred not to admit—spent on wondering the reason why Hinata cried, he couldn't even maintain discussing over their minor thesis—which was a shock because minor thesis was the only thing that kept him agreeing to wherever Sai had invited him to. His thoughts kept drifting back to Hinata involuntarily.</p><p>The only solution to relieve his restless mind was probably to face Hinata upfront, asking her himself. But, he still hadn't collected his nerves to do so. Though he didn't willingly admit, he knew for a fact, he wasn't quite.. ready.</p><p>Flashing a glance to his unbudging phone, he felt another urge to run a hand to his hair. What did he expect? For Hinata to text him? More less to call him? Why would she contact him? She should be mad to him for his avoidance little tactics. It would be only normal for her to be mad at him, he expected her to do so, he wanted her to do so. Yet, he didn't even know why he wanted it. Did her ignorance on their almost-kiss moment hurt his pride that much? Didn't he say he wanted to protect their friendship? From what, exactly? From falling deeper to the abyss of unsolicited feelings? For whose sake was he actually doing this for? For their friendship? He wanted to puke. <em>What an egotistical bastard</em>, he thought.</p><p>It was for his own sake.</p><p>Another poke was felt on his arm. <em>Damn, woman, can't you just stop?</em></p><p>Sasuke glared to the pink haired girl next to him. "What?"</p><p>The bright green of her eyes widened in shock. Her eyes darted to the table. "Hmm," Sakura started tentatively, "you got a message, you looked like you might be expecting it."</p><p>He almost laughed to himself. Did his gesture give away that much?</p><p>"It's from Hinata," she continued with a smile.</p><p>Ignoring the fact that she smiled—<em>why the hell did she smile?</em>—Sasuke immediately reached for his phone.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>Can I call you?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>Sasuke called her without a second thought.</p><p>He heard sobs after the second ring. "Sa-Sasu-ke?"</p><p>Feeling increased amount of adrenaline flowed within his veins, Sasuke immediately tidied and collected his belongings on the table and shoved them hastily to his bag.</p><p>"I-I've read about anxiety d-disorder in a-a family s-setting," said Hinata in between sobs, "a-and I-I can't s-seem to read—"</p><p>"I'm on my way, Hinata."</p><p>A pause.</p><p>"O-okay."</p><p>Another pause.</p><p>"B-be s-safe."</p><p>Hanging up, Sasuke stood and shouldered her backpack.</p><p>"You're going now?" asked Sai.</p><p>Sasuke nodded before he stalked out the restaurant, completely in the blind as Sai and Sakura eyed the earphones he left behind.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke opened the door tentatively. Closing the door behind him, he padded deeper into the living room. Hinata was hugging her knees on the couch, evidently sobbing. Papers scattered on the armrest, some fell and laid on the rug. He flashed a glance to the dining table; where her laptop and notebook—still opened—remained.</p><p>Putting his bag on the rug carefully, he stared at her. "I'm here, all right," he said, stepping closer to the armrest. "What part that you don't understand?"</p><p>Hinata's head tilted slowly, facing him up.</p><p>"I'm glad," she murmured, smiling despite the flowing tears.</p><p>Sasuke crouched and took her notes that laid on the rug. "Anxiety disorder you say? What about it?"</p><p>Silence.</p><p>Sasuke looked up to see Hinata stared at him in the eye.</p><p>"Sasuke, are you avoiding me?"</p><p>Sasuke averted his eyes and busied himself reading on her notes. "Silly, this one is easy, no need to cry."</p><p>Ignoring the urge to sigh, his lips twisted into what he hoped was a smirk.</p><p>He got caught.</p><p>He got caught the way he wanted not to be. What troubled more wasn't the fact that he got caught, though. It was the fact—as realization slowly sinking in—that it was selfish of him to be avoiding her. They both knew they needed each other, particularly in a time like this when exams were only around the corner. It was the main reason they were friends after all; to study together. Then, how could he make 'friends'—he wouldn't regard them as friends, but to put it simply—with Sai and the other two girls when Hinata was all alone in the company of their empty apartment.</p><p>Now, for him to think about avoiding her was to protect their friendship, well, he just realized it by now, it did the exact opposite. He had been losing what he initially had tried to protect.</p><p>But, he couldn't just ignore the urge to gaze at her, touch her, hold her, <em>kiss</em> her everytime she was near. So what <em>should</em> he really do about it?</p><p>In the meantime, he should at least study with her until their exams. The rest of his <em>problems</em>, well, he didn't have a choice but to find the solution later.</p><hr/><p>Sitting on his usual table in the library, Sasuke rummaged through his backpack for the second time but to no avail. He calmly recalled where he had left his earphone. His room? Not likely. His car? Probably. He didn't remember removing his earphones from the front pocket of his bag, yet—</p><p>"You didn't read my text, why?"</p><p>Sai sat opposite him.</p><p>Glancing up, Sasuke smirked. "I don't need you anymore."</p><p>Sai snorted. "You surely still need me," he said, the familiar earphones dangling from his fingers. "You left it yesterday."</p><p>The smirk turned into an inscrutable twist. Sasuke tried to grab it but Sai dodged his hand.</p><p>"This is custom made," said Sai matter-of-factly, "where did you buy this?"</p><p>"It was a gift."</p><p>"I see. Why don't you need me now?"</p><p>It was Sasuke's turn to snort. "Apparently you're not enough to replace something I actually needed."</p><p>"Something?" Sai's dark eyes glinted with interest.</p><p>"Someone. Just give it to me already."</p><p>"The same someone who gave you this?"</p><p>"Sai-kun?"</p><p>Both males tilted their heads to look at the new person to enter within their area, standing in between them.</p><p>"Oh, Hinata," said Sai, wasn't expecting her arrival at all.</p><p>The girl smiled. "Have you finished the paper for tomorrow?"</p><p>She even made conversation, <em>why?</em> "I haven't, actually."</p><p>"You know him?" asked Sasuke, still staring at Hinata.</p><p>"Yes, we are in the same group this semester."</p><p>Sasuke nodded slowly, completely ignoring Sai. "You done?"</p><p>Hinata nodded, suddenly darted her head toward Sai—as if had just remembered he was there in the first place. "Am I interrupting something?"</p><p>Sai watched them in amusement. The interaction between them practically screamed there was something interesting going on.</p><p>"No," replied Sasuke, "I was just about to tidy up."</p><p>Head tilted to Sasuke as she nodded slowly, Hinata's eyes locked to the earphones in Sai's hand. "Isn't that Sasuke's?"</p><p>Sai smirked. Gotcha, Sasuke.</p><p>"Well, yes, I borrowed this from him. I am in fact, in the midst of returning it to him." Sai stood, leaning his head to Sasuke's level. "Here, Sasuke, take good care of this." With that, Sai smiled to Sasuke that visibly implying on something else.</p><p>Frowning, Sasuke grabbed the earphones rather forcefully.</p><p>Passing Hinata on his way to exit the library, Sai waved a hand. "See you, Sasuke, Hinata."</p><p>"See you, Sai-kun." Hinata stared at Sai's receding back rather too long. "Sasuke," she called at last, "it was custom made.. why would he borrow it?"</p><p>Sasuke simply snorted. "Let's go."</p><hr/><p>Drifting back to his initial habit surprisingly felt more relieving then he'd dared to think. He kind of.. missed it. It was absolutely easier to concentrate studying with Hinata. He was catching up things quicker and undeniably easier than he'd thought he could. The syllabus he should had mastered for the past three weeks and the rest of the weeks before mid-semester exams had sunk deep inside his head for only a week and a half.</p><p>He also had found a way to solve the problems he had when he subsconsciously got distracted by Hinata.. he would move to the couch and continue his reading or memorization free of distractions.</p><p>He hadn't expected studying again with Hinata would become such a thrilling experience. Ironically, Hinata had become the presence he needed for him to focus studying, yet she became the very presence that could distract him. Nonetheless, as it neared the exams, he had expertly adjusted himself not to let any troubling thoughts in the way of his studies. Strangely enough, he'd just realized it now, Hinata's presence had become a refreshing sight to stare at when he had too much staring at the long paragraphs.</p><p>"Sasuke!"</p><p>Sasuke was slightly surprised by the sudden calling. He was in the middle of reading about chronic disease management care when Hinata—sitting on the dining table—suddenly called him. From his position on the couch—yes, earlier the night he'd had another episode of distraction—he turned his head toward her, implying he was listening.</p><p>Hinata looked startled, her mouth agape and eyes widened. "What time is it?"</p><p>Sasuke raised an eyebrow but glanced at his watch nonetheless. "It's only ten."</p><p>Hinata sighed. "Thank God, it's Naruto's birthday tomorrow."</p><p>Glancing again at his watch, it was indeed the 9th of October, one day before Naruto's birthday—or in this case two hours before. "Ah, you're right."</p><p>"We have to call him at twelve."</p><p>Sasuke nodded and continued on reading the papers on his hands.</p><p>They were in the middle of mid-exams week and both had been studying considerably enough so on one night prior they only need to have a quick—but thorough—review. Family medicine—compared to the previous organ systems associated subject matter—was indeed easier to perceive but the concept was abstract and confusing at times. He definitely much preferred the organ system topics—particularly cardiovascular, still his favorite—with their exact sciences (even though some molecular pathogenesis isn't completely understood even until now). On times like this, they usually went to bed at ten or eleven for a fresh start tomorrow, but that night was definitely not the case.</p><p>Glancing at his watch, it showed five minutes before midnight. With the papers still on his hand and his phone on the other hand, he made his way toward the dining table and sat opposite Hinata. Hinata looked up at him from her papers before glancing at her phone.</p><p>"Now?" she asked.</p><p>"Now."</p><p>Hinata nodded and called Naruto's number on loudspeaker. It rang thrice and Hinata's optimism crumbled. "W-will he answer though?"</p><p>The ringing stopped.</p><p>"He could be sleeping," reasoned Sasuke, "try again."</p><p>Hinata complied.</p><p>No answer again this time. After calling Naruto for ten times and no answer on the other side, Hinata decided to call it a day. "W-well, we can call him in the morning.."</p><p>Sasuke nodded before both went to their own room.</p><hr/><p>The next morning before they went for a drive to the campus, Naruto still didn't anwer. They decided to call him again after today's exam. Now inside the lift and waited to reach their floor, Sasuke called Naruto. He answered after the third ring.</p><p>"Idiot, where have you been?" Sasuke asked.</p><p>Sasuke felt Hinata slapped his shoulder lightly. "Seriously, Sasuke?"</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Ah, my bad, I missed your calls," said Naruto, "I kinda slept a whole day after submitting my project. I didn't sleep for three days straight!"</p><p>"No, it's all right, Naruto," said Hinata apologetically, "sorry to disturb when you should be resting. We just want to say happy 21st birthday, Naruto!"</p><p>"Yeah, happy birthday, idiot."</p><p>"Thank you, Hinata! It's already afternoon, but you both are the first ones to wish me a birthday after waking up." Naruto laughed. "And you, bastard, I'm 21, stop calling me idiot."</p><p>"Being 21 has nothing to do with quitting being an idiot."</p><p>A familiar ding was heard after Hinata inserted the password to their apartment.</p><p>"Are you in your apartment?"</p><p>"Just arrived," Sasuke answered, closing the door behind.</p><p>"Have your exams yet?"</p><p>The talk lasted for two hours. It turned out the three of them had missed each other more than they had thought.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>the heart (1,2)</p><p>(1) a hollow muscular organ that pumps the blood through the circulatory system by rhythmic contraction and dilation; (2) regarded as the center of a person's thoughts and emotions, especially love or compassion.</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>After the mid-semester exams, it wasn't difficult to occupy his time. It was even predestined, now that the fourth year students—in the last semester of their pre-clinical program—had only one thing to focus; finishing minor thesis. Coming back and forth from Kakashi's office to gynecology and oncology department respectively had become the newfound habit for Sasuke in the chill of November. The medical records he needed was not of great in quantity, but because they concerned on patients' privacy—moreover being a woman related disease that occurred to males—he could only take home five records per visit. On the bright side, being a rare disease made the sum of records relatively handful; with only twenty records total. He still needed to visit the Konoha University Hospital for more than four times nonetheless, if administering the ethical permit was taken into account—which was more than one visit thing.</p><p>Aside from having the same necessity to visit the hospital more frequent than they ever had, Hinata had it more unfortunate. She was dealing with a much more medical records in quantity of total two hundreds or so. She could take home twenty five records per visit, but even so she still needed to visit the hospital for more than eight visits. Bringing thick twenty five records to home was hard work, having to return them to hospital in exchange for another records was more than hard work. Sasuke had to put aside his selfish wishes and deemed it to be necessary to help Hinata. The hospital was only a ten minutes walk from their school building, they would go by foot to the hospital to take some records and walked back to the school building to go home with Sasuke's car. Finding available parking lot in the hospital was difficult even for the residents, for students (moreover pre-clinical ones) would be near impossible. Walking back and forth from their school to the hospital was the ideal option.</p><p>With all the hustles of working his minor thesis and Hinata's, he found himself obliging or even... pleased. These moments probably the most comfortable ones he had since the start of the new semester. They had returned to comfortable close friends and do all their activities side by side without strain—particularly on his behalf. It felt nice walking with Hinata on his side, eating three time meals with Hinata opposite him, driving to their destinations with Hinata on the passenger seat, and looking at her first when he woke and last before he went to bed. And all those, without him being afraid of impulsively do the things he shouldn't do, with them being occupied to their minor thesis. She hadn't talked about anything in regards of the 'strain' in their relationship—or sort of—due to his little cowardice, so he hadn't arise the matter. He needed to though, he knew, he just didn't want to stir the peace they'd achieved, at least for the moment. She was very considerate and he was a coward taking advantage of the situation, but at least he felt bad about it.</p><p>The weather had turned colder by the day as it neared winter. Everyone had put on their coats. Another week passed, and the final exams were about to be held. Adding the obligation to study on their plates when they had already had so much from only working on the minor thesis had put a lot of pressures on their shoulders. The last days of November would probably be the most stressful week of their studies in medical school, had they not counted the clinical years and higher pursuits in the medicine field that yet to come.</p><p>They had their finals on the first week of winter. OSCE was the last examination of the week. After—yet again—called in the earlier session than Hinata, now already completed his last exam as pre-clinical student, Sasuke sat on their usual table in the library. With his white coat still on, Sasuke penned his name on the form he had picked up from the administration office.</p><p>Hearing light footsteps he was so familiar with, he took the time to look up to the approaching girl. Her hair was in a ponytail, a mandatory for long haired female students when performing their clinical examination.</p><p>"Ah, you'll register today?"</p><p>"Seems like it, the examination will be on the 21st," he paused, taking in the picture before him; her in white coat. The clothing naturally belonged to her. "Have you finished inputting your data?"</p><p>Hinata sighed and sat opposite him. She raised a hand and played the escaped strands of hair near her temple. "Almost. I will need all extra weeks I can have for revisions though. We've been procrastinating too much, haven't we?" she chuckled. "We should've had the whole two weeks winter holiday provided if only we've managed to finish our thesis before the finals."</p><p>Sasuke shrugged. "I'm not regretting my inadequacies."</p><p>"Sure! Coming from someone that have filled the thesis examination form."</p><p>He snorted. "I'm going to submit this," he said, waggling the form in his hand, "do you want to wait here or walk with me?"</p><p>"I'll tag along," said Hinata as she stood and followed Sasuke exiting the library. "Ah, Sasuke?" she said as they walked side by side toward the administration office.</p><p>"Yeah?"</p><p>"Good luck on your thesis exam, I hope I'll catch up soon."</p><p>Sasuke smirked. "You'll catch up soon enough."</p><hr/><p>By the time the evaluators had finished signing his minor thesis, it felt like a heavy load has been pulled off his shoulders. He bowed to his evaluators (the blond haired Professor Tsunade and the brunette Assistant Professor Shizune) and to his supervisor—Professor Kakashi—before exiting the evaluating room. With only some revisions to be made, he practically had finished his pre-clinical program.</p><p>Barely managed to suppress the growing smile on his face, Sasuke strode toward the main entrance of the building. There he saw the long hair of hers rippled as Hinata turned to face him with smile so bright that radiated sincere happiness. Racing toward him, she spreaded her arms as if to give him a hug. Which she did.</p><p>A mixture of cinnamon and some citric flower he could only assume as rose engulfed his nostrils. Dominated by the surge of foreign feelings he assumed to be happiness, his hands moved on their own and hugged her back. Oh, and how that felt so right.</p><p>Hinata pulled away completely and looked up to him. Her nose and cheeks were red due to the cold, but her eyes gleamed with obvious excitement.</p><p>"Congrats, Sasuke!"</p><p>Scratching the back of his neck, he said, "Thank you for coming."</p><p>"Let's go home," she said as she tugged on his sleeves, "I'll make you the best dinner everr!"</p><p>Pocketing the other free hand inside his coat pocket, he followed the girl tugging him with complete obedience.</p><hr/><p>"When is your thesis exam?" Sasuke asked from the couch he was sitting at.</p><p>Tilting her head up to him from her position on the microfiber rug, Hinata answered, "27th, huh."</p><p>Sasuke's eyes widened before he raised one corner of his lips into a lopsided smile. "Well, isn't that good luck."</p><p>Returning her focus to her laptop, the tapping sounds of her typing continued. "Next."</p><p>Sasuke pulled another file from the piles next to him and flipped to the page with the patient's diagnosis. "Male, 68 years old, ischemic stroke," he read aloud.</p><p>Hinata nodded and the tapping continued. "Next."</p><p>Sasuke pulled another one. "Female, 75 years old, Alzheimer's."</p><p>"Ne—ah! Sasuke, don't you plan to go home?" The tapping stopped.</p><p>"You're not going to finish all this by tomorrow if I'm going home, silly."</p><p>Hinata chuckled. "No, seriously, go home, Sasuke. I know I can manage," she said, before added, "somehow."</p><p>Sasuke patted her head with the files on his hand. "Next, Female, 65 years old, hemorrhagic stroke."</p><p>The tapping continued in a slower manner as the girl typing laughed. "All right, all right, next."</p><p>"Male, 80 years old, Alzheimer's."</p><p>"Thank you, Sasuke," said Hinata, turning her head to look at him.</p><p>Sasuke looked down at the girl sitting on the rug. Hadn't he sacrificed himself enough for this girl? He read all her files, did all the week's chores, explained her the methods she should be using, ordered the food deliveries, scanned through her draft to find any error, bought her cinnamon rolls because he didn't know what else to do, and didn't go home because.. he didn't want to. He got the strange feeling it would never be enough. One could say it was only a fleeting feeling at the moment. And what he was feeling right now, if it was for Hinata.. he wouldn't really mind to do <em>almost </em>anything. Weird, yes, yet he didn't even mind the very idea lingered in his mind. Shaking off his thought, he put on a smirk. "Don't disappoint, Hyuuga."</p><p>Hinata smiled. "I won't."</p><p>Sasuke took another one. "Female, 64 years old, Parkinson's. It's the last one."</p><p>"Really?!" Hinata typed the last one eagerly. Raising both her arms, she stretched. "Ah, I can't believe I've finished everything. Now, working the fifth chapter then send this to Professor Kurenai and wait."</p><p>Sasuke glanced at his watch. "I'll buy takeaways for dinner, have anything in mind?"</p><p>"Hmm, curry?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded as he put on his coat. "I'll be home by eight, is that all right?"</p><p>"You're going somewhere first?"</p><p>"Yeah, I need to stop by somewhere."</p><p>"Okay, be safe."</p><p>Sasuke took his keys from the counter and proceeded to exit their apartment.</p><hr/><p>The parking lot was practically full, he needed fifteen minutes alone to find an unoccupied one. Switching off his car as he ran a hand to his hair, he pondered on where to go first. He needed to stop by somewhere because he needed to buy something for Hinata, for her birthday present. Somehow, he got the feeling it needed to be something special. She had given him custom earphones, well, hadn't she thought thoroughly on what to give him? She also have her thesis examination on her birthday. Certainly, all the more reason to give her something special. Yet, excluding all the reasons above, he just got the feeling it had to be special. He <em>wanted </em>it to be special.</p><p>Opening his door and brought himself out, he thought of buying her a book, or books. Hinata liked to read fictions. He could buy one easily, but Hinata didn't have any particular interest on books as of now so it wouldn't be special. Passing by a stationery store, he thought of buying her a set of colorful pens and sticky notes and all the things available to support her writing that colorful notes of hers. Suddenly remembering how persistent she was to keep them colored with more than three inks at the very least, Sasuke chuckled and hoped no one heard and assumed him to be twisted. She had already too much colorful stationery, it wouldn't surprise her anymore to try buying one.</p><p>Trying to recollect what had been bugging her and what had she wanted to buy, he couldn't find any single helpful memory. The girl already had everything. She came prepared on everything.</p><p>Trying to find what she needed was to no avail. He tried to alter his track of mind to find the thing Hinata would want. Hinata was a girl, so anything a girl would want. But that one very idea was even more difficult and he'd expected much. With so little time on his hands before he had to buy the curry rice, he had yet to think on what to buy. He ran both hands to his dark locks, restraining himself from pulling them. How could buying a single gift can be this frustrating?</p><p>Walking aimlessly, he caught a sight of a jewelry store. A bracelet on the window display caught his attention. Inching closer, he observed the bracelet that lay elegantly on its acrylic stand. The bracelet was simply a silver circular chain with sufficient little pearls dangling on its loops. The white pearls reminded him so much of her eyes. One of the shopkeepers from behind the window must had caught him staring because she was outside with him now.</p><p>"Isn't this one beautiful?"</p><p>Sasuke didn't know what to answer. Sure it was beautiful, but he wouldn't buy it anyway, wouldn't he?</p><p>"Are you looking for the perfect gift for a special someone?"</p><p>Well, yes, Hinata was his close friend and the girl he <em>thought </em>he liked… so she was special…</p><p>The shopkeeper laughed. "You've been standing here for a significant fifteen minutes for me not to notice, and staring at the particular bracelet. Not feeling certain she would like it?"</p><p>A girl would definitely like a jewelry, right? But buying a jewelry as friends didn't feel right. Hinata would assume him to be too forward. He himself thought he would be too forward.</p><p>Finally managed to collect his voice, he answered the shopkeeper, "She would like it. But I'm not in the position to give it to her." He turned his eyes from the bracelet to look at the shopkeeper.</p><p>The shopkeeper gave him an understanding smile. <em>As if she understands.</em> "Well, sometimes, the heart knows it best. You just have to listen to your heart and simply do it."</p><p>
  <em>The heart knows it best? All the heart knows is how to pump blood.</em>
</p><p>Sasuke flashed another glance to the bracelet before giving the shopkeeper a curt bow. "Sorry to bother your time," he said before walking away.</p><p>Walking away with a slight tugging inside his chest, he thought, maybe the shopkeeper did understand.</p><p>And pumping blood isn't the only thing the heart knows how.</p><hr/><p>Laying on the couch with both hands holding a book, Sasuke watched—over the rim of his book—as Hinata paced back and forth before the dining table. Flicking back his eyes to resume his reading, the sound of her steps distracted him he could only see the words without really perceive the meaning.</p><p>She had been pacing like this since yesterday. Hinata had finished the materials needed to present her minor thesis the day before yesterday. Since then, she practiced and practiced her presentation before Sasuke so he would give her his based-on-experience opinions. If she had just finished one practice session, she would pace. Then she practiced once again. Feeling restless and couldn't seem to have things right, she would pace again.</p><p>Slapping his book closed, Sasuke sat upright. "Tomorrow you'll do good," he uttered, putting the book on the table, "have faith in yourself."</p><p>Hinata made an abrupt halt. Turning to face him, she said, "I know. But!"</p><p>Looking at her, Sasuke raised an eyebrow. Her face was a mess of worry, one would say she was in the brink of crying madly. "But?"</p><p>Hinata's eyes followed him as he moved toward her, her pearly eyes looked watery. She probably was in the brink of crying.</p><p>"Put on your coat," said Sasuke, pulling his own black waterproof coat from the coat stand on the entrance hall.</p><p>Taken aback, Hinata watched him putting on his coat. "W-what?"</p><p>"I'm taking you out."</p><p>"W-why? It's already ten pm."</p><p>"You've been inside the apartment for days stressing over the same thing," said Sasuke firmly. "I'm taking you out," he repeated.</p><p>"I-I need to prepare for tomorrow a-and—"</p><p>"You've prepared enough, Hinata."</p><p>Hinata sighed. Slowly, she made her way toward Sasuke, eyeing her own eggplant padded coat but did nothing.</p><p>Sasuke tapped his foot impatiently as he pulled her ivory knitted scarf from the coat stand and shoved it to her. "What do you want? Street food? <em>Oden</em>? Cinnamon rolls? I'll buy you anything."</p><p>Hinata laughed as she took the scarf. "What bakery still open at this hour?"</p><p>"We'll manage."</p><p>Hinata laughed more as she encircled the scarf around her neck. "Is this your present for my birthday?"</p><p>"You could say that," said Sasuke softly, he looked almost apologetic, "I haven't prepared anything, sorry."</p><p>"No, it's okay," said Hinata as she eventually put on her coat. "I know just what I want."</p><p>Sasuke nodded and reached for his keys but was interrupted midway as Hinata caught his arm. "And we walk," she added, smiling brightly.</p><hr/><p>Their apartment was located fifteen minutes walk away from the downtown. Stepping out of the warmth of their apartment building, both felt the strong wind of winter and tightened their coats. They walked side by side quietly, each savored the beautiful view of the winter night. The closer they walked toward the downtown the more crowded the streets.</p><p>Sasuke was surprised when Hinata tugged him to stop in front of a salon.</p><p>"Now, you go somewhere and buy something warm. Don't come until I call you!"</p><p>Sasuke froze, and not because of the winter. What did this girl want in a salon? Some hair mask? Nail works? Massage?</p><p>"Can I have the money please?" asked Hinata, batting her eyelashes.</p><p>Sasuke stared at her in disbelief before begrudgingly giving her his smart card to which Hinata took with both hands. "Spend wisely," he said as he poked her cheek.</p><p>"Certainly!" assured Hinata as she pushed him to go. "Walk."</p><p>He pulled his long legs forward and chuckled. Glancing a moment at her figure as she entered the salon with a jingle of the bell.</p><p>Walking aimlessly from alley to alley, he found himself back again down the street with the same jewelry store from days ago. He unconsciously lingered there, his feet failing to move, bored to the very spot, and eyes staring to the same bracelet. It was relief he felt to know the bracelet was still there; the very same spot. He didn't know how long did he stay there, but catching a glimpse of the same shopkeeper giving him the same knowing smile through the display window, he knew, it wasn't brief. All he could feel at the moment was the tempting bracelet asking him to take it home with him, the strong winds that asking him to tighten his coat multiple times, and—surprisingly—his conscience—or heart, whatever that is—asking him to be done with it. <em>Buy, wrap, give it to her, period.</em></p><p>After another long minutes, he found himself back again down the mainstreet with the salon. On the corner of the street, a man had just exited the convenience store holding a steaming paper bowl. Sensing his cheeks were stiff and lips were chapped by the cold and the audible growl of his stomach, he quickly made his way toward the convenience store.</p><p>After almost thirty minutes in the convenience store, he still hadn't gotten a call from Hinata. She definitely had a massage then, a whole body package even. Swallowing the last bit of his <em>oden</em>, he drunk the warm broth. The comfortable warmth from the broth didn't relieve him from being restless.</p><p>Finally, his phone vibrated.</p><p>"Where are you?" asked Hinata.</p><p>"I'm at the convenience store by the corner."</p><p>Sasuke heard some rustling from her side. "Okay, I'm almost finished. You can come now."</p><p>"On my way," he said before hanging up.</p><p>Pushing the door with a shoulder, he caught a glimpse of cinnamon roll inside the glass countertop display. So they did sell cinnamon roll at this hour. Not a bakery, but a convenience store. <em>See, we'll manage.</em></p><p>Although the taste probably wouldn't even worth it, he bought one nonetheless. Hinata would appreciate it just the same. Or less.</p><p>He arrived at the salon just as the door was swung open. It revealed a woman with the familiar eggplant padded coat and the familiar ivory knitted scarf encircled her neck but instead of dark long hair framing her form, she had a shoulder cut of the same dark midnight hair.</p><p>For a moment, everything surrounding him felt completely still. As the woman caught his eyes looking, she smiled brightly and waved. The woman was the girl he used to know. The girl who was his best friend. The girl he thought he liked.</p><p>The girl he liked.</p><p>It was her birthday, but Sasuke was the one getting the surprise.</p><p>"What do you think?" she said now that she was in front of him.</p><p>Sasuke felt his mouth dry, his brain froze; he couldn't think of anything except the fact that she was beautiful.</p><p>"Are you that surprised?" she laughed with a hand covering her mouth. As if a realization just introduced itself to her brain, her pale eyes widened, somehow glistening they reflected the light just like how a pearl would. "It doesn't suit me, doesn't it? Maybe I looked better with long hair, huh?"</p><p>Sasuke still couldn't think of anything other than beautiful. He was considering to just say so, but couldn't collect his nerves to do so.</p><p>"Sasuke? Why don't you say anything?"</p><p>Blinking for almost like the first time in a lifetime, he managed to at least ask. "Why did you cut your hair?"</p><p>Hinata smiled as she looked up to the night sky above, adorned by the sleepless stars. "What a beautiful sight to gaze upon." She pulled the sleeve of his coat. "Let's go for a walk," she said as she tugged him to follow her.</p><p>"I just thought I needed some changes," Hinata started, still tugging on his sleeve. "Sometimes, changes are good, right? I've reflected for the past three years; we were so caught up in endless monotone life as a medical student. I'm already 21 now, time just flies mercilessly. I thought cutting my hair would be the first easiest good change for me to make."</p><p>His tongue was persistent not to let him talk.</p><p>Hearing no answer, Hinata chuckled sheepishly. "I hope I didn't choose wrong.. Ah, it snows!"</p><p>It wasn't even the first snow of the winter. Yet, she cheered happily as if it was.</p><p>"Hinata," he voiced at last, liking the sound of her name escaping his lips.</p><p>"Sasuke?" Even more the sound of his name from her lips.</p><p>And he didn't even feel surprised.</p><p>"It suits you," he said, looking at her. "Happy birthday."</p><p>Hinata was startled at first but smiled when looking at him nonetheless. "Thank you, Sasuke." She gazed up ahead to watch the falling snow. "You just gave me the best present I could ever wish for."</p><p>He didn't know if she meant the haircut or the snow, but decided to take it as it was; her thanking him. He gazed at the face of the woman next to him as she savored the sight of the falling snow, a visible breath escaping her mouth. It was hard to have a full sight of her face without bending as their height difference could only grant him the access to look at the top of her head. He bent his upper body nonetheless.</p><p>There were two things—his heart was thumping madly from thinking these two things and even more for the latter and he felt incredibly warm despite the wheather—two things he finally grasped from the little walk they had.</p><p>Aside knowing for sure the meek kind-hearted girl walking beside him had matured into a beautiful woman that was very much his flatmate, longtime best friend, and soon to be colleague in the medical field, he knew one more thing—</p><p>he had fallen too deep he feared there would be no rope—no nothing—to pull him back.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>fe·ver</p><p>an abnormally high body temperature, usually accompanied by shivering, headache, and in severe instances, delirium</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>For unknown reasons Sasuke hadn't needed to be knocked on the door since the start of the semester, Hinata was surprised on the next morning when he hadn't come out of his room for he had promised to drive her to school. Or to at least greet her, reassure her, for that day was supposed to be a big day for her; thesis exam and—sure—her birthday. Taking a bite on a butter-spreaded toast, she knocked on his door casually only to find that even after the third set of knocks there was no answer from his side of the door. She knocked again and a faint grunt was her only reward.</p><p>"Sasuke? Are you all right?"</p><p>Another grunt.</p><p>Concerned, her hand reached the knob. "I'm coming in, okay?"</p><p>It was apparent that he had just woken up, bundled in his grey comforter, eyes still shut ever so forcefully. Another thing she noted, he was shivering although the heater was on comfortable warmth.</p><p>"Sasuke?"</p><p>Fighting the unbearable headache, he opened his eyes with strain. "I think I have a fever," he croaked.</p><p>Hastily shoved the last bite to her mouth, she strode to his side and knelt to get a better view of him; noting his forehead was glistening with sweat. Feeling his forehead with the better—cleaner, with no crumbs—palm, she didn't need thermometer to confirm it.</p><p>"Do you have paracetamol around?" she asked, looking around wildly, aimlessly.</p><p>Sasuke coughed and shook his head and Hinata spontaneously moved the tissue box from his nightstand to the space near his head.</p><p>"I have them in my room." She stood and exited his room.</p><p>Returning to his room, Hinata brought a half strip of paracetamol and his mug already filled with water. Watching her approaching form, Sasuke sniffed and pulled a tissue.</p><p>"Here," said Hinata, tearing the foil packaging for one caplet and reached out to him.</p><p>Sasuke hoisted himself to a sitting position—still bundled inside the comforter—and reached to take the caplet from its torn foil. Hinata helped him for his mug and widened her eyes as if something had just come to mind. After putting the mug back to the nightstand, she exited his room.</p><p>Sasuke was too weak to ponder why.</p><p>Not more than a minute, Hinata returned with a plate containing a bread and mini pack salted butter and placed them on the night stand. "I didn't make any breakfast.. do you want me to toast this first?"</p><p>Sasuke shook his head.</p><p>"Uhmm, this won't be enough. Do you want me to order something first? Or do you prefer to wait for me? I'm second in line so I'll be finished at ten thirty, I think."</p><p>Sasuke shook his head again and smirked weakly. "It's fine, I'll wait for your tomato soup."</p><p>Hinata nibbled on her bottom lip. "Eat the bread first, okay?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded. "I'm sorry, I can't drive you," he said, genuinely sounded apologetic.</p><p>Hinata smiled. "Just get better, okay?" Widening her eyes because reminded of something, she revealed a thermometer from the pocket of her blazer. "And do check your temperature." She put it carefully on the nightstand. "I need to get going."</p><p>Sasuke nodded weakly. "Good luck."</p><p>Hinata smiled as she brushed a strand of damp hair out of his temple. "Thank you."</p><hr/><p>Walking toward the main entrance building of her campus, it definitely was relief that she felt. Yet, all the relief—from finishing her pre-clinical program plus minor revisions to be made—was overwhelmed by solid unease. Buying ingredients for today's lunch—tomatos, baguette, onions and the like, and more tomatos—was done in a haste. She contemplated to buy ingredients for dinner, so she bought tofu and <em>kombu</em> for a simple miso soup, but they could choose to order something as time goes by later.</p><p>After placing the bags on the counter, Hinata skipped the knocking and opened his door; relieved to see his plate was already empty. The bundle—of Sasuke—stirred at the sound of door being opened.</p><p>"What's your temperature?" She asked as she placed a paper bag of medicine she bought from the drugstore she had visited on the way on his nightstand.</p><p>"38,7," he croaked then coughed.</p><p>Hinata tapped the medicine. "Here's for the cold." Biting her lip, she said, "I'll make something for you to eat, okay?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded faintly, feeling the headache had lessened but only partly. Opening an eye, he asked, voice hoarse, "How was your exam?"</p><p>"I'll tell you over the meal," said Hinata with a sincere smile.</p><p>Sensing her receding steps, Sasuke put an arm over his eyes, trying to smirk but could only manage a grimace. Her smile was a good sign, at least. Feeling a good minutes passed by, Sasuke smelled the enticing scent of his favorite tomato soup—second to none, even to his mother's. So much for not liking tomato for its texture, but accomplishing that kind of good meal made of tomato, she certainly was simply gifted. And not every occasion he got to have the meal in question, for she preferred not to, but being sick was definitely one of those times. Holding the medicine, his mug, and the empty plate and managed them on both hands, he dragged his feet wobbly to the dining table.</p><p>Hinata must had heard the door being opened, or the pathetic sound of his steps gave him away for she looked at him over her shoulder, giving him a look of concern.</p><p>Sasuke sat first, feeling sick enough not to bother do things spontaneously. "I feel better," he mumbled, then coughed. "Slightly."</p><p>Watching his flatmate turned her head back to the stove—but managing to catch the ever present look of concern—he took in the sight before him keenly, concentrated even, despite the headache. Watching her back with their stove as the background was always a sight to see, without him completely aware, his eyes reflexively stayed and lingered. It wasn't the usual long hair, or messy bun, or even the tight ponytail he saw. Her hair now long enough to cover her nape and ended just barely to brush her shoulders. It gave him all the reason to appreciate more of her form as a whole. The slender arms, working their way about the utensils; the lines of her narrow shoulders as they continued in a curve to reach her hips; the lower limbs as they took small steps around the kitchen or to turn around—and faced him, holding the pot.</p><p>His gaze devotedly followed her movement as she put the pot down in front of him. A bell from the front door caught both's attention, as finally pale eyes locked to the already fixated dark eyes. A questioning look she gave him and he merely shrugged, deep down relaxing knowingly.</p><p>Hinata made her way toward the door, glancing at Sasuke midway. The bell was from a delivery man, holding a strangely familiar plastic bag with a reasonable sized box inside with care. Had the man not mentioned the order was from an Uchiha, Hinata wouldn't take the box in without second thought. And sure it was, now holding the box, her heart palpitated in anticipation with the thought of practically grasping what this was all about…</p><p>Absentmindedly she thanked the man with a dazed smile then closed the door.</p><p>"You.. ordered something?" she asked, stepping closer to his side still holding the box. Sasuke nodded carelessly, bringing himself a spoonful of tomato soup to his mouth. Watching him enjoying himself with the soup, Hinata nibbled on her lip. "Can I open it?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded once again then, with a smirk this time, watching with such attention as Hinata tried to roll the plastic bag to the sides and opened the box with her hands. Her nibbling on the lip quivered with a sharp intake of breath.</p><p>It was a delivery of.. a cake. From the usual bakery she bought cinnamon rolls from, with the second favorite—after the rolls—in the form of Japanese styled strawberry shortcake. A cursive writing neatly placed in the middle of encircling fresh strawberries.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>Happy Birthday</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>Hinata looked up from the cake to the awaiting dark eyes of the one who ordered. Her view was blurred by the incoming salty liquid—missing the genuine smile of her counterpart—and already sniffing, she murmured, "Sasuke.."</p><p>In fear of betraying his own feelings with an uncontainable smile, he turned away and played with his spoon. "Chill them and eat this first before their temperature switch."</p><p>Hinata happily obeyed him then bounced back—still happily—to her chair and sat. "Thank you," she said, helping herself for a bowl of her selfmade tomato soup.</p><p>"How was your exam?" He looked up to her then, surprised to see her gaze was already there for him.</p><p>"It's good news, definitely," she answered, the smile never left.</p><p>Sasuke tried to smirk, but her smile could do so much to him that returning it back with a smile was the only of same value, so he smiled. "Congrats. I know you can do it."</p><p>Hinata nodded eagerly, persistent to lock his gaze to hers. "I know."</p><p>It was late for him to realize; his soup was already cold. But he couldn't care less.</p><hr/><p>After dedicating their time (nursing the sick and revising minor thesis in Hinata's part, and heavily laying on the bed and lazily reading books on trying to get better in Sasuke's part) inside the confinement of their apartment, Sasuke's fever went down the day after tomorrow, but his cold symptoms remained. Feeling genuinely bad for keeping her at home and treating him (despite another obligation on her minor thesis), he insisted to go outside for a stroll or movie in the cinema or anything aside from being inside saying <em>"my treat"</em> with a weak attempt to smirk. Hinata didn't approve though, for he wasn't healthy enough, the weather wasn't helping, and she still had revisions after all. So they decided over for a movie night and some food deliveries, treating themselves for an almost finished pre-clinical year and Hinata's birthday.</p><p>Sitting on the dining table earlier in the evening before their movie night, as she made revisions on her minor thesis while eating a slice of her—<em>ughh</em> so good—cake, her phone vibrated and showed her sister was the caller.</p><p>Not a greeting she heard, nor a wish of birthday as her sister had done when she was walking back to her apartment after getting the haircut. It was a blatant query, with a hint of hurt. "How come none of you can go home for the break?"</p><p>Putting her spoon down, Hinata nibbled on her lip. "I'm sorry, Nabi. I still have revisions, Neji, well he is simply busy, with his clinical program and now a research assistant to one of the professors."</p><p>"Ugh! I'm so mad, I really want to go to med school, like, right now."</p><p>Hinata giggled, feeling the tension on her shoulders loosened substantially. "You've made up your mind?"</p><p>"Yeah.. I think, with all of you getting into one, I can hardly see other possibilities."</p><p>"You still have a long time to ponder about that, don't rush things."</p><p>"Yeah, yeah, I know. Enough about me, so how was your birthday?"</p><p>"I passed my thesis exam, thankfully." Hinata idly eyed her laptop screen, fingers tapping on the table. "And well, now I'm doing revisions."</p><p>"You didn't go out?!" Hinata reflexively flinched to the opposite direction as her sister screamed through the phone. "Where is Sasuke-niisan?!"</p><p>Nibbling her lip again with guilt, she tried to contain another giggle. "He had a high fever and still has a cold."</p><p>"Seriously! Why!"</p><p>"It's all right, really," she reassured, couldn't stop the giggle, "he got me a cake at least." Hinata audibly spooned the said cake to her mouth and hummed. "Hmm and it's incredibly good."</p><p>"Yeah, yeah."</p><p>She touched her hair idly, remembering a particular night. "And.. we went for a stroll on the night of my birthday," she apprised softly, replaying the night inside her mind unintentionally—though she didn't mind. And the smile came naturally.</p><p>"Sure, a stroll."</p><p>Giggling, the hand which was touching her hair tapped the table excitedly. "You might be surprised! Are you in for video calling?"</p><p>Sensing something odd, Hanabi was silent for a moment. "What is it? You're being weird.."</p><p>"No, nothing weird, I promise."</p><p>"Okay."</p><p>Hinata switched the call to video mode instantly, couldn't stop herself from being excited to see the response she'd get from her little sister. After a blink of the screen to finally reveal the face of her sister, Hinata felt a pang on the heart, realizing just how much she had missed her adorable little sister. Hanabi was squinting terribly at her and Hinata chuckled.</p><p>"Ohmigod, Hina-nee!" A perfect surprised countenance replaced the squinting.</p><p>"Surprised, huh?"</p><p>"You've grown that hair of yours for such a looong time."</p><p>"I know, so how is it?"</p><p>Hanabi took the time to think, fingers absently touched her chin. "It looks good on you, honestly. But I prefer the long hair? But I'm not against this either."</p><p>Hinata laughed. "Okay."</p><p>"And I can clearly see he is undeniably sick."</p><p>Hinata reflexively glanced to the corner of her screen, where it mirrored the Sasuke on the background as he walked out of his room, looking drained and nose red.</p><p>"I'm not even surprised he didn't say hello or anything," commented Hanabi as Sasuke disappeared from the limits of the camera, "but, damn, he just can't change, can he?"</p><p>"I can hear you, shortie," from the kitchen Sasuke countered flatly, voice still hoarse although somewhat better.</p><p>"Ughh, I can't even complain now. That nickname has lasted too long to get rid of it."</p><p>Hearing the answer faintly, Sasuke smirked over the rim of his mug.</p><p>"I am miserable without you all guys. Father did stick around more, but ugh. Father just being Father."</p><p>"I know, Nabi," Hinata said apologetically, glancing at Sasuke as he sat opposite her, putting down his mug. "I'm sorry."</p><p>"Maybe I should visit you, hmm?"</p><p>"Hmm, I don't think Father would allow you.. being alone back and forth and all."</p><p>"I can ask.. Naruto-niisan?"</p><p>Sasuke widened his eyes marginally, somehow feeling his ears warm and he didn't like it.</p><p>"Uhmm. We don't know if he is home though? He has this project that forces him to stay I suppose."</p><p>"Ugh! And now I feel bad about the whole thing. I took up your time too much, did I?"</p><p>Hinata shook her head, smiling reassuringly. "You will never."</p><p>Hanabi returned the smile. "I'll just let you by yourselves then."</p><p>"You sure?"</p><p>"Yeah, is Sasuke-niisan still there?"</p><p>The one mentioned lifted an eyebrow. "Asking for me?"</p><p>"…you want to see him?" offered Hinata, bemused.</p><p>"That would be better!"</p><p>Hinata hovered her arm over to Sasuke and he took the phone as if it was burning charcoal.</p><p>"What—"</p><p>"Stop being a jerk and kiss my sister already."</p><p>
  <em>What did the brat just say?</em>
</p><p>Satisfied with the look the Uchina gave her—total bewilderment and slack-jawed—Hanabi smiled smugly.</p><p>"Bye." And the screen went blank.</p><p>The time froze for sure. Hinata stared wide eyed at one spot on the table, sensing Sasuke did the same but to her already blank phone screen. Did Hanabi just… Why Hanabi? <em>Why?</em> When in the summer telling her sister about the near accident was a relief to finally let out the things inside her own secret box, now she felt nothing but dismay. She thought her sister could be trusted...</p><p>After a good minutes with solid silence, Hinata heard a light tap of her phone being put down to the table then sensed—as her eyes still focused on that one spot on the table—Sasuke shoved her phone in a swift motion and abruptly stood. It was a mistake—although she did wonder if it was barely a minute after—to look up—although reflexively—as she inadvertently caught his eyes. She was sure she was already red from her nose to neck even her toes, but as if watching some wizard do wonders, she was the living evidence of the transformation from already-somewhat-red-due-to-the-cold Uchiha Sasuke—the stoic, composed man she regarded as her precious best friend and passing the times with him in the same vicinity for as long as she could remember but never in her life did the same thing happen—into a mess of red she could only think of tomato—probably because it was his favorite fruit—as the counterpart. And the look in his eyes! He was utterly flustered and failing miserably to hide the disorientation behind his façade. Hinata had the urge to giggle then, despite her own embarrassement. And she did so after Sasuke unceremoniously shut his door closed.</p><p>Laughing heartfully to the spectacle she'd just watched, she decided to put aside all her transient nasty feelings toward her sister, deeming they just needed to talk in person, heart to heart, definitely. It was probably because the culminating previous events that had led her to a near conclusion but another thing that had just transpired was the finishing touch. Also, it was probably because she was really close to him, had been knowing him in person for a long time, that had made her near able to read him for he was a complicated person; a person with blatant sometime twisted words, contained countenance, and minimized gestures. But that was.. that was an utterly flustered Uchiha Sasuke.</p><p>Yet, whatever conclusion in her part would only be a mere assumption without the consent of another's.</p><p>Thinking that Sasuke must have a hard time collecting his composure to remain calm and dignified, Hinata decided to save her file and flip close her laptop. Stretching that resulting a pop of each her joint, her eyes wandered to the couch. How many blankets would they need? How many books needed to be stacked beneath her laptop? Somewhat frowning, she thought maybe they do need a television after all.</p><p>The mirth never leaving her person, Hinata made her way toward her room to collect the blanket and pillows needed.</p><hr/><p>Feeling the blood rushed to his head, Sasuke suppressed the urge to pull his cheeks off his face. He didn't know if it was the pulsating of his arteries, the tapping of his foot against the floor or his palm against his thigh, or even the thumping of his heart. Or the gasps he needed owing to the state of near panic adding to his already congested nasal cavity. How was he supposed to face her after this?</p><p>Long until he sat on the edge of his bed, then stood near his closet, tapping the wooden surface with one hand and the other. Whose idea was it to sit and listen the conversation between the Hyuuga siblings? Whose idea was it to accept the offered phone that he almost slam against the hard surface of the table? Glancing at the clock above the headrest of his bed, he cursed. Whose idea was it for the damn movie night? Technically it was hers.. but after he had suggested for an outing to which she firmly disagreed. He might as well sleep his nerves off but knew better it would only end up to an endless wakeful night.</p><p>More curses and a lot of glancing at the clock before his hand reached the door knob. It was the thick scent of butter he first noticed when opening the door, butter with kernels. Then an alarming chime from the microwave and soon she walked past him toward the counter, glancing idly to him midway. It was normal. She was doing normal. Too normal.</p><p>"I've ordered pizza," she informed casually, her back to him as she opened the microwave. "Might arrive any minute now."</p><p>Was it really nothing to her?</p><p>Gulping, his eyes followed her—holding a bowl full of buttered popcorn—as she cautiously padded toward the living room. Settling his eyes to where she went, he took the sight of their usual made up movie theatre. Two of her light blue pillows piled haphazardly in the middle of the couch, her lavender blanket tucked on the crook of the armrest nearest to him, her overly thick medical textbooks stacked into a precarious mountain atop the table with her laptop as the peak. All hers. Inconvenient, he'd always say. She'd always insist and he'd always comply. Simple.</p><p>Just as he started to made his way to her, the bell dinged and Hinata automatically reached for the door. It was the pizza guy. He didn't realize he was still standing in between the dining table and the couch staring over his back at Hinata approaching him until he needed to turn his head to watch her settling the pizza on the table next to the pile of textbooks. Something twisted inside his stomach. Could be the olfactory reflex from smelling the cheesy pizza. Or the fact that his feet were bare and the cold from the floor struck him in a sudden. Or it was the idea gradually materialized inside his head that probably she wasn't entirely considerate about it. Minor part being considerate and the major to be deliberately indifferent.</p><p>She was simply ignoring the matter.</p><p>It unnerved him, agitated him. Rippling any tranquil part inside his body into no more. She played indifferent? Sure, so be it.</p><p>Forgetting the fact that he might need a pair of socks later with the wildly rushing of thoughts inside his head, he sat to the nearest side. In his daze, he accidently landed his bum on the blanket and without another thought he pulled the material beneath him and covered his crossing legs, instantly smelling the familiar rosy citrus yet again. It weren't air refreshener and mopping liquid only then, it was everything inside their apartment. And forget about the indifferent part; Hinata stared at him with an open interest on her eyes, lips quivered in an attempt to contain her giggles. He glanced at her impassively, immaculately concealed the wonderings inside his head. Deeply curious to know the inside of hers.</p><p>Casually she sat beside him and pulled the remaining part of the blanket to cover her. The blanket was large enough to cover the two with adequate space between them. The pillows were moved in between them; when they reached out for the pizza, or when she thought the volume needed to be lowered, from both's laps, to their backs, or between their arms and the armrest.</p><p>"We do need a television," she mused idly in the middle of the movie.</p><p>He mentally agreed, absentmindedly thinking that they were already on their fourth year, another one year and a half and they'd off to become a full-fledged GP on their own. He did want to continue in residency, he'd been wanting to apply a particular department. But they hadn't really talked about their plan on the future yet. Would they continue to share an apartment? This particular apartment they'd been living in together. At the thought, his working brain halted. The future. How would their future be? Would everything stay the same?</p><p>He knew better it wouldn't. It couldn't.</p><p>It must be due to the medicine he gulped after her insistence for he felt his brain slurred on the same thoughts repeatedly until he felt his eyelids became extremely heavy. It was warm, comfortable, and so easy to sleep in. With the familiar scents overwhelming him, the blanket and pillows that were all hers, the background noises of some screaming and supposedly suspense backsound, and her very presence palpable even when there was space between them, he drifted to sleep without much restraint.</p><hr/><p>Feeling no motions beside her for a good long minutes, Hinata glanced curiously to the boy next to her. His chest was raising in a slow rhythm of breathing, eyes shut firmly yet without any effort, and all of his was covered with the blanket save for his head. He was sleeping, peacefully at that. Hinata envied the drug effects on him. Too easy. She never had the same privilege.</p><p>Chuckling softly, she murmured into the air, "Traitor." Somewhat hoping he caught her voice somewhere in his sleep.</p><p>She could hear the background noises of dialogue, clashing of swords, more dialogues, and it didn't reach her when the credits had started to roll. His sleeping face was the same as how she'd always remembered from the memories of their studying sessions since high school. He'd always pushed himself to his limit in the aspect of studying. More often than not, she'd fall asleep first and wake in the middle of the night to find him already succumbing to sleep, with books and laptop still on and hand holding a pen or highlighter. She'd always adored him for that and for other things she couldn't pinpoint in a one sitting speech.</p><p>She'd always known something was off. She had sensed them ever since he'd asked her to share an apartment. Because it wasn't an ordinary joy she had felt, it was something else. Something more. Something much more. It was as if she had been waiting and when he asked her, she was granted a wish she had been too afraid to have.</p><p>When she voiced her opinion of how she didn't have any interest in a relationship—deep down confused if it was what she actually felt—it wasn't an idly said statement. She did want to see his reaction for the matter and to confirm where she should stand in their relationship. So she did. She portrayed the Hinata that had no interest in a relationship. And she did good. She was satisfied with him beside her, it had always been enough.</p><p>Whatever feelings she had for him, however, only grew. Becoming more and more to fear any crack would put them to danger, so she put on greater effort to play the best friend. Struggling with all her might to maintain whatever relationship they had, as long as they were together, yet deep down she knew they couldn't be like this forever.</p><p>The not so subtle deeds in his part, however, put her between a rock and a hard place. Between succumbing to her deepest conscience or to keep playing her part as the best friend. She had been struggling so much and it actually dejected her when his involuntary deeds could affect her so much as if her resolution had no concrete base.</p><p>The only thing she feared was the impending and inevitable parting if it were to come to that point. She couldn't see herself with any other than him and she hadn't think enough the only thing for her to decide was to take a step outside the comfort space of their apartment. But she was afraid. Afraid they would lose track and couldn't come back. So far, keeping silence was as much as her courage could make her.</p><p>She had learned to love even the worst of his apathy, silence remark, the tendency to avoid anything too troublesome to handle. So when he had avoided her... she was afraid she was a trouble. A trouble for him. So then again, she played the best friend.</p><p>Idly gazing at his lips, she couldn't stop herself from thinking what would become of them if he were to proceed kissing her back in the summer? Would they be sleeping in each other's arms then instead of him leaning on the groove between the armrest and the backrest as she watched him from her spot close enough to see the rise of his chest but even so felt so distant. She was confused of what she really wanted. As simple as the sentence to describe her predicament though the confusion wasn't as simple.</p><p>Feeling his state of sleep rubbed off on her, she let her heavy lids close. Embracing the comfort of the shared blanket for the first time that night as she drifted to unconsciousness.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke woke in the middle of the night, finding his shoulder heavy. Blearily shaking his head to make out of his surrounding, he caught the sight of an indigo head, rising rhythmically with the rise of his shoulder. He let himself to caress her hair, admiring his courage despite the drowsiness, feeling the smooth strands fell in between his digits as he moved his hand up and down the length of her short hair. Noticing her wriggling socked toes, he tried to move in difficulty to reach the blanket and cover her toes with the smooth fabric while maintaining his shoulder beneath her steady.</p><p>That felt right and so wrong; he felt like taking advantage of her sleeping form. With no care for the world how the morning would come, he deliberately succumbing to his sleepy state yet again with a dazed thought lingered even until he fell asleep.</p><p>What did he do in his past lives to deserve a very considerate person to name as best friend?</p><p>
  <em>I.. really shouldn't take her.. for.. granted..</em>
</p><hr/><p>The next morning, it was Hinata that had a fever. She wasn't lucky enough because Sasuke couldn't really cook but he managed to make them an instant cream of mushroom soup. She smiled when eating nonetheless, despite the headache and lethargy.</p><p>On the new year's eve, Neji visited them with cans of beer and street foods to celebrate the new year only to be disappointed when he was the only one to crack a can for himself while watching the other two pitifully blew out their noses on the tissues.</p><p>The two were sitting on the couch leisurely reading a book respectively as he gulped down the beer sitting cross-legged on the rug before Hinata when the counts started. The fireworks had long started before, adorning the sky that was visible through the glass sliding door of the balcony. "Ah, it's new year already," said Hinata, unfazed by the noises from outside. "Happy new year, Sasuke, Neji."</p><p>Flipping another page, Sasuke looked at her. "Happy new year."</p><p>Neji nodded as he took another gulp. "Yeah, happy new year."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Terminology</p><p>Co-assistant : Cooperative Assistant is what to call a clinical student in hospital.</p><p>Chief Co-assiztant : or simply Chief Co is the person in charge to coordinate fellow assigned Co-assistant during shift.</p><p>Resident : an MD currently in residency to pursue specialization</p><p>Welcome to the clinical program, Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>ex·ci·ta·tion</p><p>the state of enhanced activity or potential activity of a cell, organism, or tissue that results from its stimulation</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>Now completely aware of his own feelings with the lack of response from her despite the near obvious suggestive gestures from him, to be in the same room with her and breathing the same air suddenly felt entirely different. Catching her eyes looking, feeling her presence looming, smelling that citric rose mopping liquid scent, and everything about her made him feel self-conscious—inwardly he cringed from thinking about it. He wasn't the best of kind to assess one's personality, even in regards of his own. But he knew himself enough as arrogant, apathetic, selfish, perfectionist, composed and everything but not self-conscious. This particular trait was Hinata's. And it wasn't like she rubbed off on him, not deliberately at the very least.</p><p>After the little walk they had on her birthday—save for the days he'd lain in bed from sickness—he felt any little doings in his part would give away his feelings. He felt the need to rethink a lot on how to behave when Hinata was around. The cake delivery was an impromptu decision from thinking too much already. The headache due to cold probably at fault majorly, but repeatedly considering to buy the cake had been giving him another headache if not worse. He didn't want Hinata to find out.. yet. He just hoped she hadn't despite his previous misfortunes. He was in dire need to sort things out on what to think and what to do regarding this turn of event. If only he could erase the Hanabi memory from his brain and start fresh anew…</p><p>For him to be smitten over a girl was laughable. He simply acknowledged himself to be good looking, handsome even. He could feel all the stares the girls—even boys, he shuddered at the thought—of his year had been giving him and even some from his seniors or even his juniors. To put it simply, he was famous for his looks, with them hardly know him in person. Let's just say, he was famous without him trying to be. Heck, he didn't want any of the attention.</p><p>He simply wasn't interested in girls. And not in that way.. not in the homosexual or asexual way. Well, he almost thought himself to be asexual, funny, but that was the truth. Now that he put time to really think about it though, he suddenly had a theory materialized inside his head that the reason he wasn't interested to pursue 'romance' was simply because he had Hinata around all this time. He hadn't needed that little woman touch in his life because he had had one, that was Hinata. The thing is, he'd only regarded her to be his best friend, flatmate, study buddy, anything that pronounced 'platonic'. With this theory inside his head, he couldn't shake the strong urge to wonder just how long had he liked Hinata really? Romantically, certainly. Probably at first it wasn't anything romantic.. but it was without a doubt comfort what he had been feeling all this time, or even contentment. He'd always liked her around. He'd always liked her presence. He'd always liked her kind attitude. He'd always liked her soft voice. He'd always liked to see her shoes lined on the entrance hall. He'd always liked to see her padded coat hung on the coat stand. He'd always liked everything associated with her.</p><p>Damn it. He liked her, period.</p><p>He didn't even want to touch another word for 'like' even though what he felt was definitely not as simple as '<em>like</em>'. For heaven's sake they'd been friends and living together for years and he had nothing to do aside from worrying about his studies then involuntarily her.</p><p>And what the hell was he thinking about anyway? What he was about to say (inside his head, if that made sense) was the fact that he was good looking and any girl would want him and he wasn't in the position to like a girl, unrequited one at that. And to joke around with his life even more, he liked the girl that always had been in his life that was very much his longtime—<em>platonic</em>—friend. He had survived almost four years living with her and turned out just fine without liking her <em>romantically</em>. So what the hell had happened?</p><p>But.. what if he had actually liked her <em>romantically</em> that long he just only acknowledged it by now?</p><p>The thought actually frightened him. He hated the fact that he didn't know it for sure. This thing people called feeling was surely a dangerous thing.</p><p>"Sasuke!"</p><p>He flinched. Damn woman, just don't. Don't. <em>Don't call me with that voice of yours. With that enthusiasm. With that pretty blushing face. Curse the winter. And stop flinching you dimwit.</em></p><p>It was such a great relief that Hinata wasn't looking at anything but her phone.</p><p>"The schedule's up," she announced, right hand holding the spoon to her mouth another hand holding her phone. "Next week we'll have the white coat and scrubs fitting and orientation lectures and other stuffs."</p><p>Sasuke nodded then spooned a mouthful of rice with good portion of tempura battered dory and a piece of roasted tomato. Yes, eventually he knew the usual menu he had in this particular donburi shop. It was dory tempura with roasted tomato served on top of a rice in a bowl. It took him exactly seven months to finally know the usual menu he—Hinata—ordered was fish tendon with roasted tomato. He did know it was dory. What he failed to know was the fact that fish meant dory. Fish wasn't specific at all. How was he supposed to know the owner meant dory when he wrote fish on the menu, for heaven's sake? (don't even dare to mention the casual fish chosen for tempura is indeed dory..)</p><p>"I'm really excited to see the rotation, oh my god," said Hinata eagerly, still blushing. <em>So pretty, damn. Damn!</em></p><p>Then she looked up to him, blinking, mouth agape. Sasuke shot up an eyebrow.</p><p>"We are in the same group," she said slowly, as if sinking the words to her head slowly as she spoke.</p><p>His life was officially a joke, then.</p><p>"It's hard to believe now that we are assigned in the same group for real," she said, eyes staring to nothing in particular above his shoulder. "And for a whole one and a half years."</p><p>He didn't need to be reminded about that.</p><p>They should be.. joyful, shouldn't they? For the past three and a half years they were never assigned in the same group (when they absolutely preferred to), now as if God finally answered to their prayers (if they prayed in the first place at all) they were assigned in the same group for the clinical year program. A whole year and a half.</p><p>He wasn't entirely sure what he felt about the announcement. If it were an announcement made seven months prior—before Gaara asked Hinata for lunch (<em>damn it</em>)—he absolutely would say he was pleased. Flashing a glance to Hinata as he played with his food, he couldn't really say if she was pleased with the notification or not. She looked like she was in a daze or something, probably perplexed because finally she got what she had always wanted but turned out empty when she had finally achieved it. Sasuke didn't want to admit he was hurt just by thinking about it.</p><p>Hinata returned her attention to the screen of her phone. "The first rotation is general surgery department. General surgery, Sasuke!"</p><p>What.. a good start?</p><p>"We'll be in the same rotation for GS with Neji's group! Isn't that fantastic?"</p><p>He must reminded himself he hadn't said anything regarding the announcement. He swallowed and drank his hot—now warm—<em>ocha</em> to cleanse his mouth. But he didn't know what to say.. what should he say? He cleared his throat. "That—"</p><p>"After GS, we'll have radiology then anesthesiology then otorhinolaryngology then ophthalmology then public health then pediatric then dermatology then obstetrics and gynecology then—"</p><p>And Hinata continued on eagerly to read their assigned rotation. He couldn't really perceived the department after department she'd read aloud. He only knew general surgery was the first. Anesthesiology was the second, or the third? He could hear her voice just clearly, but the words were stubbornly not filtered like there was some sort of sift around his head and the words were too big of a particle. He didn't even feel hurt for having been unintentionally interrupted by her.</p><p>His heart was thumping so hard that the sound reached his ears. He was afraid Hinata could hear. He reached for his glass once more and drank the remaining <em>ocha</em>.</p><p>Gazing at her, his heart was still thumping.</p><p>He still didn't know why.</p><hr/><p>The first Monday of the clinical program, they were made to assemble in the library for white coat and scrubs fitting. Now that they were assigned in the same group, the group were gathered into a circle on one corner of the library with two piles of clothing in the center, each pile secured in an aquamarine cardboard box. The groups consisted of ten students and Sasuke had only known one; the girl beside him currently pulling one grayish blue short-sleeved top from the first pile. The girl who smoothed the garment and tried it on in front of her chest. The shoulder length haired woman who half turned to look at him now.</p><p>"Hmm, how are we supposed to try this on?" she asked.</p><p>They both looked to the rest of the members of their group. Their faces looked familiar, but he didn't know a name. His eyes widened marginally when a girl right opposite of him casually lifted her shirt to reveal a tank top beneath then proceeded to try the grayish blue top, nodding to herself then removed the top before putting on her own shirt and other layers. Sasuke darted his head to look at Hinata. Her eyes were wide as saucers, her mouth agape, what he expected next was for her to lose her breathing. What he hadn't expected was for her to lift her own shirt doubtlessly to reveal her own black camisole. He could see the teal colored of another strap that without a doubt belonged to her.. her bra. Feeling flustered for unknown reason, he felt his cheeks burn and he impulsively turned his head to glare at the other members that dared to watch. No one gave a damn.</p><p>He eyed the pile and pulled one that matched his size. He could easily exit the library and change in the man's room. But damn his pride wouldn't let him. He'd worked out just fine all this time.. so showing some muscle wouldn't hurt.</p><p>Hinata tugged him on his sleeve before he touch any of his layers. He half turned to see Hinata looking at him bashfully with the scrub top and white coat on. "What do you think?"</p><p>It fitted her perfectly. And not just literally the size fitted her. It fitted her completely that he could easily foresee her with them on as a qualified doctor.</p><p>"Should I try a bigger size, hm?"</p><p>"It suits you completely just fine," said Sasuke adamantly, "write that size."</p><p>Hinata blushed. "O-okay."</p><p>Sasuke watched as Hinata bent to write her size on the form at the nearby table. She folded the paper into half and half turned to him. "You're not trying them on?"</p><p>As if in cue, Sasuke pinned the top he was holding between his knees and proceeded to remove his clothing layer by layer. He wore three layers (excluding his coat) today even though these days had stopped snowing. He was born in the summer, he supposed that was why winter wasn't always friendly to him.</p><p>Removing the last layer, the new warm tech t-shirt the local brand proud of, he grew self-conscious, completely aware Hinata was watching him—or not but she was <em>facing</em> him. Shaking aside the thought, he quickly removed the t-shirt and put on the grayish blue top. Turning to face Hinata, he zipped the zipper on one of the shoulders.</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>Hinata smiled. "Perfect!" She half turned to the white coat pile and pulled one before giving it to him. "Try this one too."</p><p>He did as told. Shrugging the white coat on, he suddenly felt different. It gave him the jitters, the excitement, but also fears. It was exciting to finally enter the clinical program in the hospital. To practice what they had been only able to do to mannequins all this time. But it was also scary.. they were facing a matter of life and death then. They were dealing with real human patients and their families—which would be troublesome and a lot of drama.</p><p>"Hmm, too short? It doesn't reach your knees," commented Hinata, eyeing him up and down. She pulled another one and reached out to him. "Try this one."</p><p>Sasuke removed the coat he was wearing quickly before taking the one Hinata was holding. Putting them on, he raised a shoulder and an eyebrow. Giving him a look, Hinata nodded approvingly. "Perfect. I don't remember you to be this tall, Sasuke." She chuckled.</p><p>It was said with such familiarity that radiating warmth towards him, particularly the area of his thorax. He hadn't been grateful enough for growing this tall, but then he was. He felt thankful for his genes' and growth hormone's hard work for making him this tall.</p><p>Strange was the word to describe what he felt at the time. It was strange for him to be pleased by the notion she'd remarked. A simple notion, idly said, without so much thought. As simple as that. The thought finally registered inside his head; his pleasure threshold had substantially decreased.</p><p>All thanks to Hinata.</p><hr/><p>The first week was uneventful one. The whole week lecture consisted of all that basic knowledge on how to behave in the hospital, know their place as a clinical student, what to be expected for them to learn and have learned, the medical device essentials for the co-ass to own (stethoscope, sphygmomanometer, pulse oximeter, infrared thermometer, and others<em> if</em> they feel the need to own one). Basically all the common preparations before entering the hospital—not as a professional—as students learning to be professionals. Both Sasuke and Hinata had known everything even before the start of the semester, thanks for the long interview with their senior by a year—one and only Hinata's cousin—Hyuuga Neji. They had gathered every information from Neji—by his cousin's request—one day on last summer only a few days before Neji drove back to his apartment. In addition, they had bought all the necessities before starting the clinical year back in the summer. Hinata had picked a stethoscope with lavender tubing and rainbow finish and couldn't stop looking at the acoustic device ever since. Sasuke bought the black tubing and smoke finish, pretty common, but "it's just so you!", Hinata had squealed. Sasuke was satisfied with his choice.</p><p>On Thursday, they picked up their new uniforms—scrubs and white coat—excitedly (only Hinata) and washed them with care for the first time. The next day was scheduled to be the first department introduction, so general surgery for them. Though exciting, having GS—with the most feasible invasive procedures for the co-ass to try—as the first rotation turned out wasn't entirely exciting. It was partly—mostly—scary. With no experience to work in the ER, they were expected to be able to execute—practice first, execute hopefully would be the outcome—the basic invasive procedures for critical patients first admitted in the ER (phlebotomy, urine catheterization, and nasogatric tube insertion) and basic surgical skill for minor lacerations. Also, don't forget about wiping the undesirable hardened-stool-smeared perineum for a neglected debilitated patient, which is tragic—for both the patients and them, literally and figuratively.</p><p>Waiting the residents—and some professors if they could make time—to arrive for the introduction assembly, Sasuke and Hinata sat on the center of the rearmost row with Neji a row before them. Their group—consisted of ten students—and Neji's group—ten students also—were gathered inside the Senju's Room; the lecture hall exclusively owned by the surgery department (conjoint of all surgery departments such as cardiothoracic surgery, neurosurgery, pediatric surgery, etc). On the walls were hung frames of proud graduates from surgery department of Konoha University Hospital. Sasuke could spot Hinata's parents on their respective departments; neurosurgery and cardiothoracic surgery. It was the first time Sasuke saw a portrait of Hinata's mother. The first time seeing her, to be exact. Perceiving any detail the greyscale photograph could offer, Sasuke must admit, the mother and her daughter shared an astounding resemblance; the same soft edges of her round face, the same rounded tip nose, and the same heart-shaped lips. Her mother had kept her hair long even after she graduated and that would be the only significant difference between them—in addition of faint lines of aging. Sasuke flicked his eyes to read the name printed on the lowermost edge of the portrait.</p><p>"I'm a spitting image of her, don't you think?" Hinata murmured.</p><p>Sasuke slowly turned his head to face her, but she wasn't looking at him. Hinata was looking at her mother's frame, a longing smile adorned her somber countenance. Sasuke didn't know how to respond—the best response he should enact. Even until now, he still didn't know much about her mother. Hinata never shared him in regards of her mother. He didn't know how their relationship was, how she died, and why Hinata had never told him anything about her.</p><p>So he never asked. She never mentioned about it. The matter never surfaced. At first, he thought he was being polite—even considerate—for not feeling required to know or have her tell him. Sasuke had always thought they were good friends, really close one and there had always been a place for her in his heart—as a dear friend—even before he realized his true feeling toward her. And looking at her now—without her looking at him—he couldn't stop from doubting if she felt the same.</p><p>"I don't need people to tell me to know, yet people keep telling me," Hinata continued, her face solemn, even hardened.</p><p>"This is my first time seeing her," Sasuke ventured. "Hyuuga Hatsuka," he continued, anticipating any shift on her face, "so it was your mother's name."</p><p>Her countenance didn't change but softened marginally. "I've never talked about her at all, have I?" Hinata turned to face him, she gave him a small smile when the side door at the front opened to reveal seven residents with their white coat on and no professors.</p><p>"All right, kids, thank you for coming punctually and sorry for the late arrival. Now, we shall begin—"</p><p>They were barely late a minute.</p><p>Hinata barely looked at him for the rest of the day.</p><hr/><p>The doctors' mess was practically empty when Neji entered the room. He placed his sphygmomanometer pouch on a nearby rectangular table after extracting it from his backpack. Taking off his coat, he made way to an available locker and put his belongings inside. The door was swung open when he was adjusting his stethoscope—gray tubing with copper finish—around his neck to reveal Sasuke and Hinata entering the room. Neji caught the sight of plastic bag grasped by Sasuke's hand and his stomach growled.</p><p>"Did you buy one for me?" he asked them immediately. He hadn't eaten anything since lunch and he was starving. They had asked him if he wanted them to buy him takeaways for dinner as he had told them his tutoring class would finish late.</p><p>"Your favorite," replied Hinata as she removed her coat to reveal the same scrubs he was wearing.</p><p>Neji gazed at the plastic bag expectantly as Sasuke put the precious takeaways on the table before removing his own coat. "Thanks," said Neji, taking one takeaway box and sat on the nearest chair. "Welcome to your first shift."</p><p>After Sasuke and Hinata had adjusted themselves following their arrival, both sat opposite of Neji and took their own boxes. The three of them ate their <em>yakisoba</em> and some side dishes pleasantly, visibly truly hungry. Fellow co-ass and residents come and go of the room as they eat.</p><p>"Are you two nervous?" asked Neji before he slurped a good amount of <em>yakisoba</em>.</p><p>"I am," answered Hinata anxiously.</p><p>Neji glanced at Sasuke and he shrugged before slurping his <em>yakisoba</em>.</p><p>Neji swallowed. "I've already had my fair share in the ER with other departments," he informed, "but general surgery sure has its own perks. I'm still nervous."</p><p>"This will be your first time as chief-co in GS," Sasuke offered.</p><p>Neji nodded and slurped more. "Yeah."</p><p>"How was your first shift in GS?" asked Hinata.</p><p>"Almost chaotic, I didn't sleep a second. It was two days ago but felt like barely yesterday. There was traffic accident, you can only imagine."</p><p>Hinata nodded eagerly as she slurped her noodle.</p><p>"How about other departments?" asked Sasuke.</p><p>Neji smirked. "Will need more brain than clinical skills <em>more</em> than this one. You barely hold.. anything. You just watch them do the works and answer questions. And ask too if they let you."</p><p>"What is your favorite so far?"</p><p>Neji turned to look at Hinata. "Don't laugh." He chuckled in a self-deprecating way. "OB-GYN."</p><p>Hinata suppressed a squeal to no avail. "No way!"</p><p>Catching Sasuke's incredulous smirk, Neji shook his head and smirked himself. He glanced at his watch. "It's seven minutes to seven, we should be heading toward the ward now," he said as he made his way toward the door. Sasuke followed suit.</p><p>Hurriedly chewing her last noodle, Hinata placed her stethoscope around her neck, grasped her sphygmomanometer pouch then proceeded to follow the other two boys not without throwing her box to the bin midway.</p><p>As they entered the emergency room, Neji tilted his head from side to side as if to find someone. Spotting a red haired resident on the office doorway, Neji stepped closer to the resident. The difference between residents and co-ass were their scrubs. Instead of the grayish blue scrubs the co-ass were wearing, residents were dressed in scrubs with their respective department's color. It was teal for general surgery.</p><p>"Excuse me, Sasori-sensei?" greeted Neji politely as he gave a brief bow and the other two mimicked his gesture. "I'm Neji as the chief co for tonight's shift."</p><p>The GS resident named Sasori nodded tersely. "Stay in the assistant's room," he said flatly as he motioned the said room with his lazy gaze. "And be alert," he reminded before he entered the office.</p><p>The three nodded and made their way toward the assistant's room—adjacent to the office room—not without having a glimpse of the office's interior. The office was the room for the residents and specialists on duty, consisted with rectangular tables and their respective PCs and chairs. When they entered the assistant's room, there were already two other co-ass in shift to which Neji greeted—they were his groupmates. Then, Neji instantly put his pouch on the countertop adhered to the wall and took out a paper, folding it twice then pocketed the paper with a pen as Sasuke and Hinata took notice of their surrounding.</p><p>The assistant room was a small room of twelve square meters. Adhered to the rearmost wall was a tiled countertop with sink on the one of the peripherals. On the side walls, there were cabinets with quick supplies (gauze, syringes, folley catheters, IV catheters and tubing, tape, emergency vials, and more others) and a trolley (to place masks, gloves, and hand disinfectant) on one of the sides near the single glass door. The front wall with the door was of clear glass, stuck to the glass were stickers of patient's identity labelling.</p><p>A blond haired resident with gray scrubs—orthopaedics—stuck out his head on their doorway. "Two just arrived trauma patients, two co-ass, please?"</p><p>Neji turned to his groupmates. "You two?"</p><p>The two nodded and followed the resident. Another resident appeared behind the glass door, a woman with short hair the shade of dark slate blue and beautiful amber eyes. Turquoise scrubs, neurosurgery. "One person follow me," she said and disappeared instantly.</p><p>Neji spontaneously looked at Hinata. "Hinata?"</p><p>Hinata's eyes widened before she nodded eagerly. Exhaling, she followed the resident.</p><p>Turning his head from Hinata to look at the remaining fellow co-ass, Neji caught Sasuke's gaze lingered to the receding indigo head. He stared with a lift of an eyebrow. Dark eyes finally fell to the pale ones before diverted his eyes to the reappearing indigo head. The same eyebrow was lifted once again.</p><p>Neji followed his gaze to look at Hinata through the glass wall. All Hinata did was the usual for co-ass to do—currently she was observing the neurosurgery resident perform the sensory assessment to the patient. Nothing out of ordinary. Unless..</p><p>Strangely, after the continuous demand of co-ass, no resident ask for them for quite a long time. Neji took the chance.</p><p>"I almost mistook you from literally boring a hole to her head."</p><p>Sasuke flashed him a glance. "Shut up." Then his eyes widened marginally before looking at Neji in person. "On second thought," he said, "give me escorting works. Radiology, pathology, anything."</p><p>Neji stared at him incredulously. "Chill, this is your first day in the ER and you want to escort beds to radiology that could take an hour or two? So eager to waste your time, hmm?"</p><p>"There are so many more shifts to come," Sasuke countered flatly.</p><p>"This," said Neji as he gestured around Sasuke's person, "isn't you."</p><p>Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Just give—," he paused, finding Hinata entering the room. She flashed a glance questioningly to their barely concealed anxious looks for her as she opened one of the cabinets to extract the supply she needed.</p><p>"Do I have something on my face?" she asked, a 10 cc syringe and a vial of ketolorac on one hand.</p><p>Both shook their heads. Hinata frowned in confusion then she left, bowing to Sasori as she went.</p><p>"Bed 5 for iliac artery Doppler," Sasori informed, lifting an eyebrow, he added, "ASAP."</p><p>"I'll do it," answered Sasuke instantly to no one in particular as the resident had disappeared to where he was coming.</p><p>Neji caught Sasuke's arm. "It's a diabetic patient."</p><p>"So what?"</p><p>"With diabetic foot."</p><p>"All the better. Bye." And he left.</p><p>Neji pressed his temples with both hands.</p><p>"Where is Sasuke?"</p><p>Slowly retreating his hands, Neji glanced at Hinata. "Radiology."</p><p>Hinata nodded. "I see."</p><p>"Hinata, something happened?"</p><p>Silence.</p><p>Hinata sighed. "I don't really know, honestly."</p><p>"What is it?"</p><p>"Hinata?" A nurse called from the doorway. Both turned their heads.</p><p>"Yes?"</p><p>"Konan-sensei called for you."</p><p>"O-okay." Hinata glanced at Neji before exiting the room. "Laters, Neji."</p><p>After having a fair share of IV and folley catheter insertions, bolus injections, and vital signs assessments himself, Neji finally had a time for a drink in the assistant's room. Not long after, Sasuke entered the room, looking somber.</p><p>"Anything aside of Doppler on diabetic foot. I will never forget that smell."</p><p>"You just returned?" Neji chuckled. "What did I tell you."</p><p>"Where is Hinata?"</p><p>Neji sighed, was he a mediator or what? "Some resident called her."</p><p>Sasuke nodded blankly.</p><p>"Sasuke?"</p><p>"Chief co?" the blond haired resident called.</p><p>Neji gave Sasuke an apologetic look, he shrugged as he exited the room.</p><p>Sasuke stared blankly in his wake.</p><p>The rest of the shift was packed with emergency patients they didn't have time for chitchat.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Honestly? this is the worst chapter I've ever written. Sasuke's POV was too OOC, I know.  This is why I think I need to revisit my older chapters. Rest assured, after this one, I promise everything will get much better. Thank you for sticking around even after this chapter xD.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>glu·cose</p><p>a simple sugar which is an important energy source in living organisms and is a component of many carbohydrates</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>The atmosphere inside was so tense it was almost palpable with fingers when Sasuke and Neji entered the ER. Passing a small circle of residents and four other people that seemed like a patient's relatives, Sasuke and Neji couldn't help but to glance their way and overhear as they padded toward the assistant's room.</p><p>"We've already explained it," a resident with teal colored scrubs admonished, "your uncle needs surgery <em>if </em>you want him to stay alive and—"</p><p>"Well, we aren't giving you our consent. He was fine not an hour ago. It must be because of <em>you</em>," interjected the supposedly niece as she pointed her finger to each of the residents—there were three. "Who knows the trick you people scheme to make my uncle—"</p><p>"I beg your pardon?" It was the neurosurgery resident named Konan. She was shorter than the insane woman, yet she gave the aura of authority. "The patient's vital signs to drop has nothing to do with how we've been treating him. We've been giving nothing but the best and we have warned you before, any outcome—"</p><p>"There you go with that heavy talking—"</p><p>Sasuke felt a light tap on his shoulder blade. "We should leave them be," said Neji as he gave a slight push to Sasuke's back. The two proceeded to enter the assistant room, but the quarrel was still vaguely audible.</p><p>"It's about money, isn't it? Don't you people just overtreat? Isn't that illegal?"</p><p>Neji shook his head in disbelief. "She wasn't even the patient's first degree relative and look how she put up those ludicrous acts."</p><p>Sasuke nodded. "She is simply nonsensical."</p><p>"Damn, I feel bad for the residents."</p><p>Sasuke nodded again approvingly. "They barely have time to sleep as it is."</p><p>Naji sat cross-legged on the floor, his pouch on his lap. "Once, I escorted a patient with a resident to the radiology department. It was CXR, three am., and we waited for the result inside. We were sitting on the chairs and he just slept. That easy. Sleeping, sitting straight on the chair. And I watched. It must be tiring." He motioned the wall from which the quarrel was heard. "And as if they haven't had enough."</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p>The two adjusted themselves inside the room and after a while, Neji snorted. "This is weird, no one asking for us."</p><p>"Be careful what you wish for," Sasuke reprimanded, sitting next to him. "You'll be called to wipe some shit on someone's vulva in no time."</p><p>Neji rolled his eyes and groaned. "Don't. Just don't."</p><p>Another co-ass—their chief co—entered the room.</p><p>"They're still going with that public show?" asked Neji inquisitively.</p><p>"Nah, currently they're pushing his bed outside."</p><p>Both Neji and Sasuke widened their eyes. "That's ugly..," said Neji, his tone incredulous, "what does the patient get really?"</p><p>"Perforated stomach," informed the chief co as he opened a cabinet, "and the duodenum too I suppose."</p><p>"Well, not taking surgery is their loss, poor patient though," commented Neji. "It's exceptionally vacant—"</p><p>"I know what you about to say," interrupted the brunette chief co, holding a vacutainer and a 5cc syringe in hand, "stop it before you succumb into remorse, I want a breather for tonight shift."</p><p>Neji snorted in his wake. "I bet you do." Glancing at the brooding male sitting next to him, he cleared his throat awkwardly. "Guess we don't have a choice but to chat."</p><p>Sasuke gave him a look from the corner of his eyes. "Yea, whatever."</p><p>Neji stared at Sasuke long, before saying, "You have something to tell me."</p><p>Unperturbed, his cousin's flatmate gave him the cold shoulder.</p><p>"Let me rephrase that," said Neji, resilient, "you have something to tell Hinata."</p><p>At the mention of his cousin's name, Sasuke visibly flinched.</p><p>Neji smirked. "I know I was right," he stated, inching closer to Sasuke their knees brushed. "Just to make it clear, Sasuke, it is <em>obvious,</em>" he continued, emphasizing the word '<em>obvious'</em>. He waited until Sasuke finally turned to face him. "I just know she knows it too," he added.</p><p>Sasuke took his phone from the breast pocket and ignored him, his face rigid.</p><p>"Guess what," Neji ventured, taking Sasuke's phone somewhat forcefully. "I'm willing to help <em>you</em>."</p><p>Having been taken the only thing that could keep him from responding, Sasuke raked a hand to his dark locks exasperatedly, feeling his composure evaporated. "Fuck, Neji, I know," he cursed. "I've tried to kiss her."</p><p>Well, that was a shock, even for Neji. "You—what?"</p><p>"<em>Once. </em>Not the right time to play the cousin, all right?" Sasuke looked at him accusingly. "You said you <em>wanted </em>to help."</p><p>His being turned composed in an instant. "I <em>want </em>to help," Neji replied solemnly. "Then, what seems to be the problem?"</p><p>Sasuke scoffed at Neji, his countenance incredulous. "Everything about it is the problem."</p><p>Neji shook his head, an arm reaching out to rest on his junior's shoulder, casually pulling him closer. "I believe you've finished your pre-clinical years from having been accomplished to understand even the weirdest shit occurs in pathogenesis, yet you can't seem to understand the very thing that only needs conscience?"</p><p>Irritated, Sasuke shrugged off his arm. "What are you trying to say?"</p><p>"I've known you enough. I've seen you two enough. You've been simply too comfortable to take notice."</p><p>"Don't make me repeat myself, Hyuuga."</p><p>"Haven't you realized it by now?"</p><p>Sasuke pulled his hair. "What."</p><p>"I don't know how you haven't realized it."</p><p>"Spit it out, Neji."</p><p>"Co-ass!" someone called from the outside. "Whose patient is bed 9?"</p><p>Neji reflexively stood up. "Shit, it's my patient." Handing back Sasuke's phone, Neji bent to his eye level. "Listen," he spoke in undertone, ensuring their eyes locked before straightening up. "She is to you is what glucose is to the brain. You know it, you just haven't admitted it, yet. You can't just starve the brain and deplete all the glucose for you to finally do what you have to do." Then he exited the room, leaving Sasuke stared at his disappearing form in his wake.</p><p>
  <em>She is to you is what glucose is to the brain.</em>
</p><p>Brain only needs glucose.</p><p>For so many forms of nutrient other cells can take as their source of energy, brain can only take glucose for normal functioning. Neji had said the accurate fact, that was for certain. Sasuke had known it for sometime, so he was right again. It was also—yet again—correct that Sasuke had been preventing himself to admit.</p><p>Feeling his heart palpitated against his ribcage, Sasuke shut his eyes. Her face materialized gradually; smiling, frowning, laughing, crying—he opened his eyes in an instant.</p><p>He had made her cry. He needed to be careful not to make her cry the second time.</p><p>
  <em>Damn, Neji.</em>
</p><hr/><p>Bed 1 – incarcerated hernia: Sasuke. <em>Check</em></p><p>Bed 2 – suspected metastatic breast cancer: Hinata. <em>Check</em></p><p>
  <em>She is to you is what glucose is to the brain.</em>
</p><p>He shook his head, hoping the thought would drop as he did. His last shift with Neji was three days ago, yet he couldn't prevent the thought to keep reappearing even until his tonight's shift. For the last three weeks in general surgery rotation, he barely had any sleep with twice a week shifts and classes at eight sometimes <em>seven </em>every morning. It must be because of the fatigue that he couldn't seem to be able to control his own mind. Squinting, he returned his focus to his own writing at hand.</p><p>Bed 3 – diabetic foot: Yukine. <em>Check</em></p><p>Bed 4 – head injury: Hinata</p><p>
  <em>You can't just starve the brain and deplete all the glucose—</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Check.</em>
</p><p>Bed 5 – appendicitis—</p><p>—<em>for you to finally do what you have to do.</em></p><p>Sasuke barely contained the urge to crumple the paper on his hands until a familiar voice called him. "Sasuke?"</p><p>His grip automatically loosened. He looked up from the list he had been writing since the start of tonight's shift; it was Hinata.</p><p>"Deidara-sensei asks for the chief co," she informed, holding a nasogastric tube and a tube of lubricant. Making her way toward the exit, she eyed the paper on his hand. "You don't have to write them..," she paused, looking at him in the eye. "But thank you, for ensuring we at least have different cases each time." She smiled before exiting the room.</p><p>
  <em>You can't just starve the brain and deplete all the glucose.</em>
</p><p>It wasn't until the resident called Deidara faced him in person did he eventually realize he had embedded on his very spot and completely forgotten the supposed message he should had gotten. Mumbling an apology, he followed the resident to the office and made a mental note to get a hold of himself. He needed to remind himself, he was the godforsaken chief co for tonight's shift.</p><p>Hearing perpetual demands from the resident half-heartedly, his eyes wandered about. He caught the sight of indigo head passing through the office glass door until the white painted wall obscured his view. Belatedly, he came to a realization that his heart had been beating to an abnormal speed. His heart had palpitated a lot lately he wondered whether he should register for an electrocardiogram or not. Would it read a sinus tachycardia? Worse, supraventricular tachycardia?</p><p>
  <em>Do what you have to do.</em>
</p><p>And for a cardiologist to auscultate the sounds his heart made. Would there be any murmur? S3 gallop?</p><p>"You're listening, kid?"</p><p>His reverie shattered. "I'm sorry, what surgery?"</p><p>"Shouldn't have become a med student if—"</p><p>
  <em>Damn, Neji.</em>
</p><hr/><p>There were no straight, unbranched, apparent veins at one glance. Hinata calmly palpated the old woman's dorsal hand, trying to find any superficial protrusion of potential vein. And...<em>There!</em></p><p>"Obaasan," Hinata addressed gently, tearing the paper packaging of alcohol swab. "I'm going to insert IV line into your system to rehydrate and give you painkillers so the pain will lessen. Okay?" She rubbed the skin with the swab, her movement agile and heedful.</p><p>The old woman nodded weakly. Giving a reassuring smile to the patient, Hinata uncapped the needle. "This will sting a little," she apprised and in one confident motion punctured through the saggy skin. The next second, she noticed the flashback of blood—indicating her successful attempt—and sighed inconspicuously. Looping the tube in a way to prevent the needle to detach in any movement of the arm, she secured the tubing to the patient's skin with tape.</p><p>After adjusting the patient's drip rate and administering the medicine, Hinata excused herself. She returned to the assistant's room after throwing the waste away to their respective bins—infectious and noninfectious. Inside the room, she found Neji was scrolling through his phone, sipping from a can of coffee.</p><p>Noticing Hinata's arrival, Neji shoved a can toward her. "Here's yours."</p><p>"Thanks." Hinata sat next to Neji and grasped the can with both hands, feeling the warmth seeping through her fingers. "No duties?"</p><p>"All my patients are in surgeries or went home, I'll just wait another one coming."</p><p>Hinata nodded as she popped the tab of her coffee. "I'm waiting a patient of mine for surgery. Not for under three hours though."</p><p>Neji took another sip and waited until Hinata put the can down after the first sip—hand still grasping the can. "How is clinical program to you so far?"</p><p>"Exciting," she replied with a smile, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "But something's amiss."</p><p>Neji was silent for a moment. "It's Sasuke, is it?"</p><p>Hinata smiled ruefully. "You just know everything, don't you?"</p><p>"You can always talk to me."</p><p>"I know." She took another sip. "Living with him for almost four years, this is the first time we have the same classes in everything."</p><p>"It's what you've always wanted. So how is it?"</p><p>Hinata nodded multiple times, every movement was distinct. "It's what I've always wanted, yes, and I'm really happy! When I first read the notice I was overjoyed but it felt too good to be true, you know? I didn't know how to react." Hinata looked at him, her countenance of that unbelieving. "I mean, after all this time."</p><p>Neji nodded, indicating he was listening.</p><p>"He avoided me at the start of last semester, you know. I have.. I have assumptions." She diverted her gaze to the can, noticing its warmth gradually disappearing. "But I don't know for sure, and.. it scares me. He might be confused, but who am I to nag when I am confused myself? But then, after awhile he stopped. Probably because he'd seen me cry." She chuckled ruefully. "That was.. humiliating. After that, we returned to our routine. He helped me with minor thesis, he didn't go home, he was with me the whole winter break. He was with me all the time. You know, we were sick." She chuckled and Neji nodded knowingly.</p><p>"But, somehow he felt distant. He feels distant even until now. Like he restrains himself from something. There were times I could feel he let loose, countable with fingers of my hands, yet it still felt different. I feel the air between us has shifted to something I'm not prepared for. I don't know when it started, I just know it has. And even in the same group with him now, doesn't feel different at all compares to our pre-clinical years. Somehow worse." She sighed. "I just want us to return to how we used to be. But I have the feeling it can't. I don't want to lose him in anyway, you know?"</p><p>Neji put down his coffee, carefully arranging his words. "Have you talked about it with him?"</p><p>Hinata's eyes widened. "What if this is all just me overthinking?"</p><p>"Hey." Neji touched her shoulder with his palm. "You've been friends for so long, even so, he'll understand you and you two can figure everything out then. Give him some credit."</p><p>Hinata was silent for a moment, sinking her cousin's words thoroughly to her brain. Deep down knowing it was just her own insecurities though for a fact she had known the answer. After hearing his answer, she did think maybe she just needed another person to voice them out, to make sense of her way of thinking. Because she hadn't been thinking the way she wanted to, it was simply the truth.</p><p>"You're right, Neji." She turned to face Neji and gave him a small smile. "Thank you."</p><p>"No trouble. But, Hinata?"</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>Neji smiled back. "Don't fear, Okay?"</p><hr/><p>The last shift of general surgery, finally. Although he surely would miss this department, but after the whole nine weeks dealing with opening up a human he just needed a break. Next rotation would be radiology; no shift, no scrubs, no nothing (he'd regret soon enough). He was in the middle of rubbing the inguinal region of some man with an alcohol swab, latex gloves on absolutely. After uncapping the syringe, he pierced through the throbbing region perpendicular to the thick skin until a strong flashback was noted. It was artery this time, not vein, he was glad.</p><p>Finishing off his procedure, he excused himself to the patient and looked for the relatives in the waiting seats. "Relatives of Shimura Danzo?"</p><p>A young male approached him, could be the son. "Take this to the lab, it says on the label it's for ABG." Sasuke handed the tube for him to take. The man nodded and excused himself.</p><p>Returning back to the assistant's room, he found the chief co of tonight's shift.</p><p>"Sasuke, can you standby here if a resident asks for me?" she asked over her shoulder as she took necessities for drawing blood from the cabinet. "I need to do this real quick."</p><p>Nodding but belatedly realized it wasn't enough, he affirmed, "Sure."</p><p>She gave him a haste smile as she hurriedly put everything on a tray.</p><p>"Hinata?" he called when she closed the cabinet. "Can I borrow your stethoscope? Mine is borrowed."</p><p>Holding the tray with both hands, Hinata abruptly turned and stepped closer to him. "Of course. Could you.." she said, gesturing the device around her neck with a rise on one shoulder, "could you take it?"</p><p>It started again. The palpitation. Cautiously, as to avoid any contact with her skin or anything of hers, he pulled off the lavender tubing half-encircling her neck. Giving a quick rise of the device currently on his hands, he looked at her, accidently met her eyes. "Thanks."</p><p>"No probs," she said as she exited the room hastily. He stared blankly in her wake.</p><p>He missed calling her name.</p><p>It was the first fact he perceived.</p><p>He missed looking at her eyes.</p><p>It was the second fact.</p><p>He missed the smile even if she generously gave it to everyone.</p><p>It was the third.</p><p>He was with her most of the times, yet, he missed her.</p><p>So the fourth, he missed her.</p><p>Tucking his head to look at the lavender tubing stethoscope on his hands, he felt the strong urge of something he couldn't discern, clenched him on the veins, suffering him in a way he couldn't describe. Neji's words involuntarily reappeared inside his head.</p><p>
  <em>She is to you is what glucose is to the brain.</em>
</p><p>When did all this start? When did he start to be dependent to her? When did she become an important existence to him? When?</p><p>It all started with how them, friends and neighbors for almost three years and study buddies for the whole third year in high school, ecstatically cheered at each other after getting into Konoha Medical School.</p><p>
  <em>Sasuke nervously glanced at the clock on his laptop screen. The digits flickered to 12.45 pm, fifteen minutes to go before the announcement. His phone rang, catching the all-too-familiar caller with his eyes, he immediately answered.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Sasuke?" called the other end, her voice shaky, lined with anxiety.</em></p><p>"<em>Hm?"</em></p><p>"<em>Do you.. do you want to see the announcement together?"</em></p><p>
  <em>Impulsively he nodded. "I'll be over in five."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>After hanging up, he immediately closed his laptop, slipped the device between his armpit then descended the stairs. Passing the living room, three sets of startled dark eyes stared at his anxious form.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Where are you going?" It was his brother, straightening his posture on the couch. "Isn't today..like the announcement?"</em></p><p>
  <em>Sasuke made an abrupt stop and half turned to his family—mother, father, and big brother. "I'm going to open the notice at the same time as Hinata. I'll give you a call rightaway."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Itachi frowned at the sight of his brother's disappearing form, but soon replaced by a knowing smirk after the front door was closed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>After the third knock, her front door swung open. Hinata stared at him anxiously, brows furrowed slightly. Stepping inside after she motioned him to do, he waited until Hinata closed the door then followed her inside.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The house unexpectedly wasn't vacant; his father wasn't in the hospital, Neji was home for the summer holiday, and Hanabi, well, she at least wasn't somewhere with her friends or something. Sasuke greeted her father on the way, announcing his presence as apparently a brief bow wouldn't be adequate as Doctor Hyuuga was reading some brain imaging he didn't care to know—at the moment—on his laptop screen. After receiving a curt nod and a polite smile from the surgeon, the two proceeded to ascend the stairs, halfway meeting an excited Hanabi descending the stairs.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Reaching the main room, Sasuke noticed Neji was seating on one of the chairs with his own laptop placed on the rectangular desk adhered to the light grey painted wall. The main room on the second floor of the Hyuuga's residence was of that a room designed to study in an appropriate environment. Long desks adhered to the wall, with bookshelves lined on the wall just above their heads. A cabinet that contained snacks were placed on one of the corner next to the fridge. Large sliding door of the balcony exposed the scenery of their street.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hinata sat next to Neji, her laptop was already there and open, showing the homepage of Konoha Medical School official site. Sasuke sat next to her and opened his own. It was one minute left when he heard footsteps approaching them—must be Hanabi. The girl rested her head on her big sister's shoulder.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Both reloaded the site at the same time. Reading the announcement thoroughly, he heard a squeal from the little sister—adding zeal to his already palpitating heart. He got in.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He turned his head to Hinata at the same time she did. She smiled so wide and so bright, revealing her teeth. She got in.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They were both accepted to Konoha Medical School.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It was ecstatic, he felt he practically can do anything and thanks to all the struggles and studies with Hinata. Hinata had been his motivation to study while aiming for med-school. It felt rewarding too when he seemingly got everything right more and earlier than she did and she would ask him for help. He actually enjoyed explaining things to her—the things she struggled to understand—ensuring she understand in the end. In fact, more often than not he would deliberately study the material beforehand so he could explain it later to Hinata. It was always a pleasure to be rewarded by her gratitude gesture and awe. It was always thrilling to study in the hope to be able to explain it to her. She just didn't know he had studied more before their studying sessions.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>At the moment, he was certain, if they keep their habit on studying together, they could nail medical school with more ease, rather than not.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So it was impulsive, without conscious thought, combined with euphoric fleeting episode, when he asked her.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Do you want to share an apartment?" he asked.</em></p><p>
  <em>Hinata turned to face him, still smiling, still in the same euphoric episode. As the words he said sinking in through her, her smile only grew, as if it was what she had been waiting for him to say.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Totally!" she said, her face beaming.</em></p><p>
  <em>Sasuke smiled too, excited to see how the future as medical student would manifest. It was a favor he offered to Hinata, deeming it would not only benefit her in her struggle, but also to motivate him study even more.</em>
</p><p>He thought, at first it was him giving a favor to Hinata.</p><p>Turned out, he grew even more dependent to her than her ever to him.</p><hr/><p>That night was their first night shift in anesthesiology department. Both walked towards the ER and after passing the radiology department, Sasuke remembered something.</p><p>"I left my phone," he said, instinctively groping his pants and breast pocket. "I'll return to the doctors' mess first, you continue on."</p><p>Hinata nodded and watched him retreating over her shoulder. After his figure disappeared on the corner, she continued on walking.</p><p>Opening the door, Sasuke frowned in a second. Gaara was inside, noticing him entering the room due to the sound that the door made, probably. He didn't really know Gaara. He had never had the same shift with him—at least not that he knew of, different departments, so who knows?—and he had never encountered him in the ER or even doctor's mess before. But he instantly had an ugly feeling toward Gaara and somehow he felt it to be slightly unfair to Gaara because he didn't really know the guy.</p><p>So he ignored him and made his way to his locker. However, Gaara chose not to ignore him.</p><p>"Uchiha, right?"</p><p>Slowly, Sasuke turned to look at him, ensuring himself whether he heard him right. Did he just start a talk?</p><p>This felt awkward already as Gaara awkwardly cleared his throat. "You might know me," he ventured, subconsciously rubbing the nape of his neck. "I'm Gaara."</p><p>Sasuke waited, he didn't really want to take part on this introduction nonsense. It was obvious Gaara wanted something. Probably anything related to Hinata. He felt his stomach churn just by thinking about it.</p><p>"I actually find you together with Hinata quite a lot."</p><p>There he was, Sasuke was right. He could choose to ignore him and retrieve his phone and just be gone leaving Gaara alone to wonder. But he was better than that. Or, he just wanted to confirm that "<em>yes</em>, <em>indeed</em>, <em>we are really really close."</em></p><p>But he opted to say it differently. "We are friends since high school."</p><p>"I see." Gaara nodded subtly. "Actually, I've been wanting to know her better."</p><p><em>So what? </em>Sasuke unzipped his backpack. "Not interested."</p><p>Did he just hear a chuckle? Coming from Gaara? "Ah, not interested to help, I see."</p><p>After closing the locker, Sasuke made his way towards the door.</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>He stopped. <em>Why? </em>He just wanted it that way, so what? So many things were going inside his head and he found so many reasons. But he couldn't say it out loud. Not to Gaara. Not to everyone.</p><p>Gaara chuckled. "Well, isn't that obvious then?"</p><p>Sasuke half turned to him, staring impassively (at least he thought his face gave nothing). <em>It is obvious, so what?</em></p><p>"Just consider this some advice from.." Gaara paused, finding the right word; they weren't exactly friends. "A colleague. You need to.. get a hold of your own self. Don't make yourself regret. If it isn't me now, there will be a new person readily take the chance."</p><p>The words sunk deep inside his head that it made him mute.</p><p>Gaara grazed the nape of his neck—again—feeling awkward. "I feel like I'm talking to myself, all right." He cleared his throat and despite the tangible awkward atmosphere, he continued. "Surely, it wouldn't be me, I can clearly see she isn't interested. But, I assure you, there will be a new person interested to take a chance. And what if she decides to be interested too?" He paused. "Get what I mean?"</p><p>"I don't really know you. But, I know Hinata and I assume you needed to hear what I've just said." Gaara tapped his shoulder before exiting the doctor's mess. "Good luck making it right, Uchiha."</p><p>Sasuke stood there, unbudging, staring at the door in his wake.</p><p>Gaara had just told her to man up, just how coward was he for a stranger to involve and knock some sense into his head?</p><p>He returned to the ER absentmindedly, pondering in repeat of what had transpired. That night's shift had been insanely peaceful, so more often than not he would rethink about the whole thing. Some weeks ago it was Neji. Barely recovered from their last talk, there came Gaara. Of all people, it had to be Gaara. Why? Was this some kind of message he should take seriously?</p><p>At three in the morning, a bed was shoved toward the ER with crying relatives on each sides. The man had septicemia and came in with bad vital signs so at first glance, they knew the prognosis wouldn't be good at all.</p><p>The situation in resuscitation room instantly turned into turmoil. Machines beeping, medical workers alternately shouting counts and orders, medical devices were shoved inside and out, and depite that, the patient's vital signs persistently deteriorating. It was Hinata's turn to do CPR. Sasuke watched with anxious eyes, unsure whether because he feared for the man's life or because the fact that his turn was next. <em>If</em> the patient survives until his turn, that is.</p><p>They had been doing CPR for almost fifteen minutes, the first ones were residents and Hinata was the first co-ass to try and him next if he was lucky enough. He had conflicted feelings about this, he truly hoped the patient would survive at least until his turn. So he felt slightly guilty.</p><p>The patient did make it until his turn, so Sasuke spontaneously changed positions with Hinata and he tried his best on doing the CPR. After the second cycle though, the relatives had it enough and asked for them to let him meet his peace. So they did. Sasuke inched away from the patient's bed, couldn't shake the feeling of guilt. Someone had just died on his hands. It was literal even though it was unintentional.</p><p>Hinata put a hand on his shoulder, stroking him reassuringly. He felt substantially better.</p><p>Now putting on his coat inside the doctor's mess, Hinata approached him.</p><p>"How about dinner at the barbeque place?" she asked, sounding hopeful. She probably wanted to console him because he didn't bother to hide his foul mood.</p><p>Sasuke looked at her. She was smiling, but her brow were taut in worry. Her cheeks were adorably adorned with pinkish hue. Her short hair was slightly a mess on the edges because of the scarf she wore. She was breathtakingly beautiful.</p><p>He liked Hinata. Romantically. <em>So what?</em></p><p>He mentally thanked Gaara for making him see things from another side of the door. He really did like her, so he shouldn't be afraid to take the risk.</p><p>
  <em>Do what you have to do.</em>
</p><p>He also needed to thank Neji later.</p><p>Sasuke smiled faintly; he was determined. "Can hardly wait."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>it's getting real, peeps. </p><p>see you next time!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>jux·ta·po·si·tion</p><p>the fact of two things being seen or placed close together with contrasting effect</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>It was probably the first time she saw a look of something near indiscernible that almost looked like fear combined with guilt or shame revealed beneath the dark of his obsidian eyes. She remembered how he always had a composed countenance even when they drove to take the university admission tests, and he could easily swallowed his breakfast the first time they had their exams as medical student when she barely touched anything, or even the day of his thesis exam. Another thing she adored about him, how despite the nerves coiling inside his body, he would be able to conceal and face the matter heedfully and calmly. Sometimes it unnerved her, how he managed to do exactly that all those times. But more often than not it soothed her. Egotistically naming her anxieties were the only problem at hand, with his calmness he soothed her and she was always grateful and sometimes forgot that he too did have his own anxieties.</p><p>Glancing multiple times to his back as they paced toward the doctor's mess, she could sense the developing tension his shoulders made. They still had an hour left for the night shift, but the residents let them out early after the death pronouncement, reassuring them there would be no scratch on their marks and they needed to take a shower and some rest before the start of another morning lecture.</p><p>Before her, he paused and stepped to the left when a bed was pushed by nurses past them. He half turned to her without really looking at her. Concerned, she stepped to where he stopped and whispered tentatively, "Sasuke?"</p><p>And when she reached his side, he looked at her briefly. "Let's go," he said lowly as he started in a slow pace, as if waiting for her to follow. Then it occurred to her, he had been waiting for her to walk with him side by side because as much as it had troubled him, he must had thought it'd trouble her too just the same.</p><p>Adjusting her steps to his or him to hers, they paced down the hall toward the doctor's mess, mentally wished to get out of the hospital as fast as their feet could allow.</p><p>Lightly pulling the hem of her coat as she studied his expression, she stepped over to him standing before his locker, pale eyes wandered to his hands working their way to adjust the coat hugging his torso. "How about dinner at the barbeque place?" she asked before the courage she had reserved for the past months failing her. Her conversation with Neji repeatedly appeared inside her head, yet even until the end of the GS rotation, she couldn't muster the courage to have a talk with Sasuke. They were busy after all, she had been saying to herself. When one time the week for her had been less packed, he would go home the next day with permanent frown on his face after another less fortunate shift. So it was now or never, before she lost another pent up courage and they lost another 'convenient' time.</p><p>He looked at her instantly, a hand reaching the door to close the locker and another reaching its way deep within his pocket. It wasn't long until he gave her a faint smile, somehow she sensed his tiredness and another she didn't dare to name behind the soft gaze of his eyes. His answer, however, couldn't be put better than it did.</p><p>"Can hardly wait."</p><p>The reflex to smile came without wasting any second; she never felt more relieved than she ever had in years.</p><p>The rest of the day was stumbling in a haze. They managed to have an hour of sleep before preparing themselves—skipping breakfast with a brief shower for both and a minimized and wobbly make up for Hinata on the ride to school—for the morning lecture. In between classes they managed to steal concise yet precious minutes to nap, mentally reprimanding themselves to read all about general anesthesia later the night at home. The last class ended at four when it should have been at three thirty, all thanks to a particular overly joyful professor.</p><p>The sky had early streaks of orange, pink, and dark blue before welcoming the early evening of another season. The trees lining the streets weren't as bare anymore, tempting the passersby to give a slight long look for the first sprout. The two visited a stationery first on the girl's lead, and when she bought multiple colored pens, sticky notes, and labels, he bought three black inked pens and a notebook with the same color as the cover instead. Next destination was the adjoined bookstore. Hinata's hand settled for a pharmacology pocket book, contained within were clinical drugs with their pharmacological properties and their respective preparations for an easier guide to choose. Sasuke mused for a moment, contemplating whether he needed to buy the same book or another ones that piqued more interest in him to which Hinata crinkled her nose at.</p><p>"You're still a student.. clinical yes, but still a student," she commented, her tone tentative in concealing her lack of approval.</p><p>Fixatedly Sasuke eyed the shelf with books of cardiology and cardiothoracic surgery lined within. "I suppose."</p><p>"You won't know whether your inclination will change after we pass all the departments."</p><p>Nodding, Sasuke answered idly. "True."</p><p>"Yes." Hinata nodded absentmindedly, blinking. "Save money for that one, buy this one instead." She reached out her pharmacology book toward his eyes.</p><p>"I don't need to," said Sasuke dismissively, taking her book with his hand and turned around in a way to go to the cashier, hiding his developing smirk from her remotely startled eyes. "I can borrow yours instead."</p><p>Chuckling softly herself, she followed him from behind, admiring the blackness of his hair matching the coat comfortably wrapping his shoulders.</p><p>After unsurprisingly purchasing the book with his money instead of hers just like how he had often been doing (despite her objection) the two exited the bookstore and jumbled to the crowded alley. The barbeque was located on the peripheral of the main street, so they needed to have twice left turns and last right turn before walking on the sidewalk.</p><p>"Welcome!" shouted a waiter standing just after the glass door when the two dark haired entering the restaurant.</p><p>The last time she visited the restaurant was late in the spring almost a year ago and she felt different instantly from her current visitation. Probably because the weather then was significantly warmer, so she wasn't really appreciative of the internal warmth. Now maneuvering deeper in between occupied tables, Hinata felt the warmth provided inside the restaurant appreciatingly as the juxtaposition from her last visit. Hearing sounds of laughter and giggles from families, friends, or couples around her, her eyes wandered about and the edges creased with a smile. It wasn't simply the warmth of the temperature, but the happiness contained inside was seeping through her and it made her forget the chill outside, although slightly—because glancing back at the clenched-jaw and coat-tight people passing the sidewalk outside through the glass doors she could almost feel the cold not a minute ago exposed to her.</p><p>Comparing her last and current visit was like elaborating alternate chronologies in the same setting but with different occasion and different associate. Gaara had always asked her opinion first starting with where to sit when Sasuke already knew where to go because they usually chose the table with the couch on one side or any empty table would do just fine, no particular requirements. On choosing the package, she already knew the cuts he liked, she liked, both liked, and the words escaped easily from her lips from one package to the other when ordering to the waiter. With Gaara, as gentle as he was, he had asked her to choose. She didn't know what he liked so she hesitated and asked, he also didn't know if she liked what he liked so in the end they'd chosen the basic package. When grilling, Gaara had given a slice of meat atop of her rice, which was nice. With Sasuke, she was the one to always give him the meat because he was rather slow and didn't really care if it was overcooked as long as it was still hot to eat. But she didn't, she always put her mind to cook the meat perfectly and demand him to eat right away which he always did obediently (most of the times).</p><p>Like right now.</p><p>"Ughh, Sasuke, don't leave the meat on the grill for too long!" She tucked a piece of meat in between her chopsticks and put it to his plate. Then the second piece. Then the third.</p><p>"Don't give everything to me," Sasuke retorted, scowling. "Eat them yourself, Hinata." Attempting to bring some meat to her plate, his scowl deepened on the sight of her plate which compared to him was like a mountain and a hill. The meat found its way to his mouth at last, albeit rather reluctantly.</p><p>"Then don't put the raw meat on the grill continuously," she countered, yet despite the intention to retort she was grinning as she put another piece to his plate and he rewarded her with another scowl plus a grunt. "Or at least be responsible for the meat you put there."</p><p>Hinata had a piece herself and hummed happily. The meat tasted much more juicy and scrumptious than the last time she went there with Gaara. Different cut, probably. Or it was because watching Sasuke struggling to eat the meat with his ever present scowl was amusing.</p><p>Ah, she missed this. She missed the tender meat, she missed the enticing barbeque smell on the air, she missed the sizzling of the fat on the grill, but most of all, she missed having them with him, with Sasuke. It took almost a year for her to have another visit at a barbeque place, what a pathetic life she had been leading. She definitely needed to visit the barbeque restaurant often, this particular one which sell real good meat, and with Sasuke, the companion she deemed to be most comfortable with.</p><p>Because it was different than when she was with Gaara. It would be different with anyone. Now she knew it for sure why it felt something was off last year. Why despite Gaara's attempt to be gentle (or if he was just a real good guy with good mannerism) and the good food she had tasted there, the date didn't really reach her heart from her senses (particularly the tongue and the eyes and the ears too) and she even almost erase the restaurant from her to-revisit list.</p><p>Because before she wasn't with Sasuke, and now it was significantly better because she was with Sasuke.</p><p>Watching him scowl as he swallowed another piece of meat, she chuckled. "The milk custard pudding here is to die for, you need to have a taste."</p><p>"I don't think I need to," Sasuke paused, a meat was pinched between his chopstick but he didn't quite raise his hand. "You tasted it when you were with <em>Gaara, </em>I guess the pudding would certainly taste good. Yeah, I'm curious to try now."</p><p>"Yeah, I bet today will taste even better," Hinata replied easily, smiling at her meat but not really looking at it.</p><p>Sasuke frowned, completely in the blind of what the hell she meant by that. "You never really tell me how your date went."</p><p>"I did! Almost instantly after I met you, don't you remember?"</p><p>"It was as vague as you could get. Practically nothing to grasp out of it."</p><p>"True." Absentmindedly she blinked. "Now that I think about it, what I felt back then was rather vague. But now it is vivid."</p><p>Sasuke lifted an eyebrow. "Care to elaborate?"</p><p>Hinata gave a short laugh. "No, nothing out of ordinary. It was simply a lunch. Nothing out of it." She looked up to him sheepishly, but openly happy. "Ah, I miss this. I miss us talking like this. We hadn't had much time to do this." Her hands gestured between them. "Us sitting over a nice meal and talk."</p><p>Diverting his eyes to the meat in an attempt to hide the growing smirk, he pinched another piece of meat. "Hn." She didn't know the extent of how he'd missed this.</p><p>After they were done with all the meat, the two settled on the milk custard pudding. Hinata was right, it tasted significantly better.</p><p>Licking the remnant caramel on her lips, Hinata looked up to Sasuke. "Hmm, it's really good. Give it a try." She had another spoon then, shutting her eyes in delight, completely missing the gaze Sasuke gave to her pink lips.</p><p>Reflexively Sasuke licked his lips before trying a spoon of the pudding. It tasted.. good indeed. The texture was to die for, real smooth and melting inside his mouth, he gave her that. The taste.. the pudding itself didn't hold any particular taste aside from rich milk into it and combined with just the appropriate amount of caramel sauce, it definitely tasted good. He had another spoon then and his first impression stood firmly.</p><p>"It's good, right?" Hinata asked expectantly.</p><p>Giving a nod, a smirk, and another spoon to his mouth to emphasize, he looked up to her knowingly.</p><p>Grinning, Hinata had another spoon. "Good."</p><p>After equally dividing the bill and paying the meals, the two entered the outside chill yet again. Almost instantly Hinata tightened her coat. She felt incredibly full and in dire need to have a light stroll before sitting again inside Sasuke's car. And they did need to <em>talk </em>after all<em>.</em></p><p>"I'm really full." Huffing, she glanced at him. "Want to go for a stroll to let the food down?"</p><p>Pocketing both hands, Sasuke glanced back. "Sure."</p><p>They walked quietly, alternately their feet would take them to any street intuitively. The first turn it would be Hinata's, the next was Sasuke's, and so on with no verbal agreement between them. The next turn took them to an almost deserted sidewalk next to the park. It was then when Hinata gulped and glanced at him before taking her chance.</p><p>"Sasuke," she called softly, at first testing how her voice would sound like. It sounded all right.. and he heard her.</p><p>"Hm?"</p><p>Gingerly she glanced up to him and found him to be looking at her expectantly with a slight raise of an eyebrow. Immediately darting her eyes down to look at her boots, she felt the instant heat on her cheeks suffusing to both ears.</p><p>"You didn't anwer me the last time," she began, giving a brief pause to calm herself down more than giving him time to guess what she was about to disclose. "Are you avoiding me?"</p><p>Sasuke stared at her lashes, admiring the flutters anytime she blinked. She was always surprising, always daring in the most unforeseeable way possible. Letting out a soft sigh, he smiled faintly. "I am not," he replied, ensuring more to himself than her.</p><p>Hinata gave him a quick glance and huffed. "Certainly."</p><p>Stifling a chuckle, Sasuke adjusted the dangling free end of her scarf to neatly tuck it beneath the multiple loops, ignoring the pout she gave him. "Yeah, I probably had."</p><p>Hinata stopped in her track, unsure if she was startled by his impulsive (or deliberate) affection more or his blatant confession.</p><p>"Oi, why are you stopping?" Sasuke pulled gently on her wrist, but his touch didn't linger long and she felt something was lost when he removed his grip.</p><p>Walking slowly, Hinata sensed him adjusting his pace to hers. "Why?"</p><p>Focusing his gaze at her scarf, Sasuke nodded approvingly. "Why what?"</p><p>Hinata huffed again. Couldn't he just stop to tease? She was trying to be serious here. "You know what," she said indignantly.</p><p>"You don't wanna guess?"</p><p>Absently touching her scarf, she turned to him, finding him to be looking at her hand playing with her scarf. "You frustrate me, seriously."</p><p>Sasuke didn't bother to stifle his chuckle. "A little bit too much at that, eh?"</p><p>"You'd know it better than I would."</p><p>For a moment they locked eyes until she turned away. "I'm sorry," he said softly.</p><p>He was confusing her. She might needed an apology from him. But.. not like this.</p><p>"And now you just apologize. What was that for?" Her boots needed to be polished, she noticed. He was adjusting the short steps she had in slight difficulty that she needed to stifle any sign of amusement.</p><p>"I was a jerk," he admitted, "I'm sorry."</p><p>Hinata paused to look at him to which he gazed back at her. There was something in his eyes, something she didn't quite know. "Yes, you are a jerk," she said teasingly which held a slight truth into it. "I don't see you aren't now."</p><p>Sasuke chuckled. He knew he should at least show some remorse or guilt for his previous misbehaving towards her. But he couldn't help from getting amused by teasing her. She was just so adorable. He also didn't really know where to start, so he apologized again. "I'm sorry," he repeated solemnly, he really was sorry.</p><p>"Can I at least know what you are apologizing for?" she asked, more firmly this time and slightly irritated.</p><p>Hinata was startled when Sasuke halted and held her wrist gently, pulling her with him as he made his way to a nearby bench. Tapping on the space next to him, he smiled at her. Her heart palpitated instantly. She had seen him smiling a notable number of times—despite it to be rare—but this was different. Through the smile and the way he was looking at her, he was giving himself away anything he had tried to conceal for the past months.</p><p>No.. it couldn't be.</p><p>Hinata sat next to him, feigning reluctance. "Yeah, we do need to talk." She rolled her eyes and almost failing when he removed his hand from hers; something was lost yet again.</p><p>"I had been arranging my mind," Sasuke started. "It is something big, to me at least. I need to be certain first."</p><p>Hinata tried to listen, but the urging demands at the back of her head told her not to keep quiet. He was insanely being vague, she didn't want to misinterpret anything. She wanted it to be as clear as possible and avoid any misunderstanding between them. She wanted to tell him to be blatant about the whole thing. But she couldn't seem to voice her thought aloud. In the end, she listened to him quietly.</p><p>"You probably have noticed much," he continued, gazing down at the concrete sidewalk but not quite there. "I was being obvious about it unintentionally… or unconsciously intentional. I don't know anymore." He escaped a pathetic laugh.</p><p>Hinata played with the hem of her coat. "You were being obvious," she offered gingerly, "kind of."</p><p>Sasuke looked at her and she didn't turn away this time. "Obvious it is then, or you just know me that much." He offered a faint smile.</p><p>Hinata wasn't satisfied at all. She waved her hands around her frustratingly. "Can we just start from the root of the problem?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded, his face solemn but with a hint of tease. "I'll answer honestly."</p><p>So he gave the initiation to her, she felt even more frustrated. She didn't know where to start either. "You had been avoiding me," she began slowly.</p><p>"I had, I'm sorry."</p><p>"Stop apologizing!" She cried exasperatedly. "If we weren't together from our last shift I would assume you to be possessed by a guilty ghost."</p><p>Sasuke was silent, but his signature smirk was visible.</p><p>"Why?" she tried again.</p><p>Sasuke raised an eyebrow.</p><p>"Sasuke, stop, please. This is serious."</p><p>Straightening his posture instantly, he assured, "Okay." A glint of worry flickered on his eyes.</p><p>Satisfied by his obedience, Hinata suppressed the urge to smile. "Why did you do it? Avoiding me."</p><p>He looked at her intently, hanging a notable pause between them, before saying, "I had tried to kiss you."</p><p>Reflexively nibbling on her lip, she thought that topic was taboo. It couldn't be help to resurface apparently. "I figured as much."</p><p>"It was confusing," he continued, holding their gaze. "It frustrated me. But.." A pause, before he continued more tentatively. "I keep on wanting to try."</p><p>Licking her lips, Hinata ignored his last remark. "That's why I said you needed to date <em>someone</em>. And I was there, so you probably could only think to try it with me."</p><p>Sasuke shook his head slowly. "I don't need just anyone. I need you specifically."</p><p>Hinata ignored the tantrum of her heart inside the ribcage. "I need you too. We are best friends, remember?" Searching his eyes, she continued in a murmur. "But, it is different."</p><p>Sasuke nodded, his eyes fell to her lips. "It is different," he agreed, "that's why."</p><p>Straight eyebrows furrowed, the beating of her heart echoed on he ears.</p><p>"Don't you want to try?" he asked softly, apprehensively. Slowly his eyes moved to hers.</p><p>Hinata couldn't find any answer. She just wanted to <em>talk</em>. Hopefully the outcome would be them understanding each other and come back as friends just like how they used to be. But this was getting real too quick. Too quick for her to process all this at once.</p><p>"Will you let me try?"</p><p>She didn't know what to reply. Instinctively, she knew it should have been an absolute no. Deep down though, beneath the layers of her connective tissue, deep within her bone marrow, she was.. inclined to the opposite. So now she was considering.</p><p>Sensing her floundering, he leaned in then, slow enough for her to change her mind in the last moment. And when the dark of his eyes became the center of his overall uncharacteristically soft countenance, gazing at her with slight apprehension—and tenderness?—she almost couldn't move an inch. But the unignorable palpitating of her heart and the increasingly intense scent of Sasuke (she still couldn't quite describe his scent into distinct sources, so it was the scent of Sasuke) did the last thing for her to finally grasp her surrounding, to be completely aware of what about to transpire.</p><p>She jolted backward then, too hast in an attempt to distance herself her hands pushed the very skin of his hand rested on his lap. For a moment her hands lingered there, eyes still locked to the onyx of his eyes, feeling the urge not to be distancing herself more to him and it confused her more than she could let on. Finally staring at their touching hands, she pulled her hands then slowly, and tried to look at him in the eye, trying to relay the message to him, giving away herself for him to understand.</p><p>She didn't know.</p><p>"Why, Sasuke?" she breathed, her gaze fell to his lips.</p><p>"You do know why," he touched her hand, just a light pressure with his palm.</p><p>Her gaze fell to their hands. "You know we shouldn't."</p><p>It was his turn to ask. "Why?" he asked in a murmur.</p><p>"We shouldn't. We can't," she admonished.</p><p>"Why can't we?"</p><p>With a sigh, Hinata replied, "You do know why."</p><p>Sasuke was silent for a moment. She looked up to him then, and he continued after her eyes met his. "I'm done running away from what I've been feeling, Hinata."</p><p>She held their gaze, but she didn't give any answer.</p><p>"You wanted to kiss me too," Sasuke ventured gently.</p><p>"I..," she trailed off, frowning and pulling away completely, diverting her eyes to look at her nervously swaying feet. "Didn't."</p><p>Sasuke scoffed. "Deny all you want," he said, leaning his back on the bench. "I've been there, I'm not coming back."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>af·ter·ef·fect</p><p>an effect that follows after the primary action of something</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>
  <em>Lub dub. Lub dub. Lub dub.</em>
</p><p>It was indeed her heart. It had to be.</p><p>She had heard countless of heart sounds, normal and abnormal. Yet, she wasn't quite sure if her heart sounded normal at the moment and her hand was itching to feel the radial artery of another hand to feel the pulses there. Her brain might be focusing solely to the palpitating of her heart, but some part of her brain was highly stimulated she felt her senses somehow heightened. Her feet was stubbornly swaying with her mind's consent and her ears could hear some rustling beside her and she was sure Sasuke had said something but she couldn't really hear, she couldn't focus on his words.</p><p>She heard him when he finally repeated with a sigh. "Let's just go home," he said, standing up. "You're cold."</p><p>Hinata slowly looked to his extending hand. She really wanted to take his offering hand and in normal days she would easily take his hand. But today was no normal day and taking his hand would be too much for her so she pulled his sleeve instead for a slight support standing up (although both knew she didn't need any help but both proceeded the exchange anyway). If she hadn't focused on evading touching his hand that much, she would notice him to be smirking somewhat genuinely smiling but not because of amusement, but because of something more and it could be adoration.</p><p>"Yes, I'm cold," she responded absentmindedly, removing her hand from his sleeve with slight difficulty (<em>why?</em>). Yes she was cold, hence the heart parade (<em>definitely</em>).</p><p>The two started in a slow pace and the only one aware of the car's location was Sasuke, the other one was too busy focusing to control her heart (despite knowing the one taking control of her heart was autonomic nervous system so no conscious control of it) and slightly messed up brain.</p><p>She was walking deliberately slowly, yet he didn't seem to mind, he adjusted his pace to hers. It seemed as if her autonomic nervous system had taken control of her somatic control of eye movement for her eyes persistently glancing at him multiple times. She was sure he sensed her stares the entire walk, sometimes he would glance back, other times he would let her be and staring ahead instead.</p><p>"You... you really want to try?" It had taken a lot of nerves and reassuring to her own self to voice that aloud.</p><p>She had expected him to admit his joke before saying meaningless apology (but he wasn't one to joke easily, really, let alone apologize), or to avoid answering by initiating another question instead like "well, what do you think?", or to twist his words and answer with "why would I even say it if I didn't mean it". What escaped from his mouth though wasn't that unexpected, though she was still surprised.</p><p>He paused to look at her. Sensing his eyes bored a hole to her side, she halted and looked at him. "I do," he replied simply.</p><p>That was when she felt her heart did skip a beat only to multiply in pace. He sounded so… solemn.</p><p>Both sitting inside his car, the ride to their apartment was filled with complete silence between them. It would have been suffocating had he not turned on the music, so it was some mellow rock band playing in the background now. The two didn't even bother to change the music; at least there was something to hear aside from their own thoughts and parading heart.</p><p>Sasuke wasn't entirely anxious. He felt relieved… from confessing at last. Although not as clear as he might have idealized, at least he had given the impression to her how he'd been feeling and what he was going to do about the whole thing. He wanted to try. He wanted them to try. The anxious part however, he still didn't know how Hinata perceived about the whole thing. It might looked like a rejection… a tender and meek one so there was a possibility she was masking something. Something he was sure to find out soon enough. He was determined to find out. She didn't even pull away until last moment so he was almost confident she didn't entirely hate the idea. <em>You wanted to kiss me too, just admit it.</em></p><p>Upon arriving inside their apartment, he didn't expect to hear anything from her until the next morning. It was utterly awkward, though he didn't really mind, the awkwardness was needed at the moment, it was natural. For the first time in his life, he envied other people that were living alone or at least didn't live with their subject of <em>infatuation </em>(before the <em>real</em> stage in relationship)<em>. </em>Some peaceful night they got moreover at a time like this.</p><p>He didn't know why he stayed longer on the entrance hall, removing his coat sluggishly. Probably to make time for her to enter her room alone without his presence. Some considerate friend he was, he felt proud.</p><p>Her petite figure reappeared at the end of the hall though, looking nervous but overall smiling tentatively. And beautiful.</p><p>"Good night, Sasuke," she said, too softly it took more than a second for him to register she was indeed saying something.</p><p>Adjusting his coat on the coat stand, he smirked and escaped a breath he didn't register to be holding. "Good night, Hinata," he said, and for good measure he turned his head to look at her and added, "sleep tight."</p><p>Hinata nodded faintly before disappearing. Hearing the sound of her door being closed, he made way to his own room, entering after giving a last glance to her door.</p><p>
  <em>So, what's next?</em>
</p><hr/><p>She couldn't sleep.</p><p>She had washed her face, brushed her teeth, applied moisturizer et cetera all over her sensitive skin, worn the most comfortable pyjama, bundled in the warmth of her duvet, in other words, she was ready to sleep.</p><p>But her body didn't want to cooperate apparently.</p><p>Describing herself to be anxious was an understatement. It wasn't quite like the day before exams, or the most recent one her minor thesis exam. She didn't feel anything but anxious then. But now, she felt other things.. it felt almost exciting. She didn't know (or didn't want to admit yet) exactly what made her to feel so.</p><p>
  <em>So, I'm not the only one..</em>
</p><p>Her eyes widened at the revelation and she squealed at the thought.</p><p>No, no, this wasn't right. Thinking over things when she should have been sleeping wasn't right.</p><p>
  <em>What should I do tomorrow?</em>
</p><p>No, no, where was her phone? She needed to distract herself from thinking too much then sleep <em>peacefully</em>.</p><p>
  <em>How am I gonna face him tomorrow?</em>
</p><p>Nibbling her lip, she thought of what to browse on her phone. She might needed to find activities for diversion, <em>right</em>, so she typed "good things to do in the spring" on her search engine.</p><p>
  <em>He was really vague! What should I do? Nothing.. nothing changed… I guess?</em>
</p><p>She clicked an article entitled "10 things you should do in the spring".</p><p><em>First, see the cherry blossom.</em> She could easily do that.. Rolling her eyes, she had the urge to find another more eligible article.</p><p>
  <em>Why did you pull away Hinata, arghh.</em>
</p><p>Hinata rolled on her stomach, stifling her squeal on the pillow and swinging her legs all over the bed.</p><p>Still tucking her chin on the pillow, she raised her head and proceeded to scroll the article. <em>Second, go for a run</em>. Seriously? <em>Third, take a hike.</em> No time, but… interesting, maybe some other time. <em>Fourth, have a picnic at the park</em>. Wild imagination rushed to her mind without her having any control. She and Sasuke sat on the blanket under the cherry blossom tree with the lake to gaze upon, she handed him his favorite tomato filled <em>onigiri</em>, he tucked the wild strands behind her ear, he leaned in for a kiss—</p><p>Hinata rolled to her back and sat upright. "Arghh, I'm getting insane."</p><p>
  <em>Fifth, pressing flowers.</em>
</p><p>Finally, a real thing to do.</p><p>The next thing to do was to search and find out more about pressing flowers. Weird, wasn't this searching something to do was to only divert her thoughts at the moment? …<em>Whatever, might as well try something new.</em></p><p>"Ah, it's really beautiful..," she voiced softly, scrolling through an article with portraits of pressed flowers. "Now I really want to try for real." After pages and articles she had stumbled upon, she frowned. "Hmm, I bet Sasuke won't be fond of the idea."</p><p>She chuckled, then froze. Before <em>this</em>.. she would straightforwardly ask him for a help and he would just nonchalantly help anyway. And for a split second she could only focus on her palpitating heart. Suddenly it became very real. <em>Sasuke has feelings for me.</em> And he wanted them to try.. try what? <em>Could you be more specific? </em>(she had to admit she knew exactly what at the back of her head). Now that she was completely aware (kind of) of what Sasuke was feeling toward her… she just got the impression that he definitely would want to help and might feigning some enthusiasm. She chuckled at the thought despite the tantrum inside her ribcage.</p><p>So, it was decided then. She wanted them to try.</p><p>For this spring, she wanted them to try pressing flowers.</p><p>She didn't quite know what to expect tomorrow.</p><p>One thing she had to admit though, she was excited to see him.</p><hr/><p>She woke rather too easily. It didn't feel like she had at least five hours sleep at all. Creeping a hand to the nightstand to look at her phone, she tried to open an eye. Squinting at the blazing screen even though she had switched it into night mode she groaned. It was only five in the morning. Saturday morning.</p><p>And now she was thirsty.</p><p>Opening the door, she instantly heard sizzling. So she wasn't the only one having trouble sleeping..</p><p>Sauntering closer to the kitchen, somewhat incredulously she said, "Sasuke? It's five am."</p><p>Sasuke looked at her over his shoulder, giving a slight shrug of one shoulder and a weak smirk. "Care to join a very early breakfast?"</p><p>Leaning her weight on the counter with a hand and peering at the stove through his working hand, she grinned. "Pancakes? I'm not one to decline…"</p><p>Small bubbles appearing on the surface of the pancake. Somehow skillfully, Sasuke flipped the pancake with the wooden spatula. "Sit, here's the biggest one for you."</p><p>Chuckling softly, her eyes crinkled. "Then I'll make the coffee."</p><p>"Can't decline either," said Sasuke, letting himself smile before the biggest pancake he was flipping.</p><p>"No milk this time?"</p><p>"No." Sasuke grimaced. "That one with the milk, I couldn't finish."</p><p>Hinata softly chuckled. "I didn't add that much though, I had the feeling you wouldn't finish."</p><p>Sasuke snorted. Not mockingly, but purely amused more to himself for even wanting to be <em>adventurous</em>.</p><p>The pouring of the coffee to both mugs, one was navy colored with three cats lazily laid on top of each other and the other one was of white china painted with lavenders, produced a sound complementing the emerging scent that gently brushed their nostrils. Gingerly Hinata brought the mugs—each on one hand—to settle them atop the dining table. Sitting to Sasuke's usual side—the one paralleled to his door—Hinata watched expectantly as Sasuke put a plate before her and to his side of the table.</p><p>Sasuke didn't sit right after, instead he opened the overhead cabinet to retrieve a bottle of maple syrup and mini packages of butter.</p><p>"I wasn't hungry, but now I feel like it," exclaimed Hinata excitedly.</p><p>Adjusting the condiments in between them equally, Sasuke choked on his own saliva as a reflex to stifle a chuckle. "Hinata? It's five am."</p><p>The two looked at each other on the eye for a couple of seconds that felt much more longer. One look was of disbelieving and the counterpart was of slight bewilderment and embarrassment.</p><p>"Sasuke.." Hinata began, her tone incredulous, "did you just.. did you just <em>joke</em>?"</p><p>Running a palm from his forehead to the chin, he sighed. "Shut up."</p><p>Sitting to the seat across from Hinata, keenly Sasuke eyed Hinata as she spread the butter and poured a great amount of maple syrup. The stare didn't break until she had a bite. "Hmm, you nailed it this time."</p><p>Nodding to himself, finally he helped himself to a bite, not before adding an appropriate amount of butter and scant maple syrup. "Finally."</p><p>Hinata nodded rather too eagerly. "Finally." She didn't have another bite right away, clearly had something in her mind to be disclosed between them. Sasuke had another bite, inwardly anticipating formidably.</p><p>"Sasuke.." she began at last.</p><p>"Hm?" he responded tad too fast.</p><p>A hesitant pause, before she continued, "Do you have any plan for today?"</p><p>It was unusual for her to be asking. They had known they usually (almost always) didn't have plans for weekends and one of them would easily come up with an idea to pass the weekend with a straightforward invitation that started with an easy "let's". Either it was getting bored at home watching something, or strolling outside in between bookstore or any other shop (not much), or having lavish meal outside or making one at home, and a healthy day would have a start with running—anyway they skipped the running for today, there was still Sunday.</p><p>"Like you need to ask," he managed, lifting an eyebrow.</p><p>The morning had started with her anticipating an awkward encounter. But Sasuke kept reminding her why and how he was her best friend. It was too easy to communicate with him. They always had that connection… somehow. "Uhhm, yeah, I guess I don't." She looked to him to see that eyebrow was still slightly lifted. "Silly me."</p><p>Nodding as he cut another bite, Sasuke reiterated impassively, "Silly you."</p><p>Chuckling sheepishly, absently Hinata's fingers played with the hem of her sleeves. "There is this thing I want to try here in the spring," she began, looking at him expectantly as he munched silently. "…I want to press flowers…"</p><p>Swallowing, Sasuke looked at Hinata closely, waiting for her to continue as her mouth was still slightly parted and spotting a smudge of syrup on her chin while doing so.</p><p>"Let's buy some supply?" she asked sheepishly.</p><p>Reaching out his hand to pull a tissue from its box in between them he sighed. "Wipe your chin first," he demanded, hovering his arm over for her to reach the tissue.</p><p>Hinata took the tissue without second thought. She wiped her chin clean all the while grinning. "Okay, done."</p><p>Sasuke let a chuckle escape him. "Done."</p><hr/><p>The atmosphere in the hospital was the same everyday; beds were pushed toward or away from them, residents running down the corridor with stack of charts, a group consisted of ten co-ass following a certain professor and struggling to answer questions asked, relatives coming and going with tears of sorrow or relief, the ever present scent of disinfectant that follow you around anywhere you go, and all of that made the perfect combination of how to describe the sensation of practically occupying most of your times in the hospital.</p><p>After Monday lecture, the two walked down set of corridors toward the main entrance of Konoha University Hospital. Luckily for them, the two had no shift scheduled for today hence at three thirty they were walking with the intention of going home together.</p><p>Until one of them was called from behind.</p><p>"Sasuke!"</p><p>The one called half turned to look over his shoulder to the source of the voice calling him—reflexively—despite the voice was too familiar not to recognize the first time.</p><p>The shoulder length pink haired fellow co-ass was approaching them. The two halted in their spot, waiting for Sakura to reach within appropriate range to them. Sasuke instinctively glanced at the girl beside him, noting Hinata was too focused on looking at Sakura with a slight frown on her face to notice his glance. Making a halt before them, Sakura glanced at Sasuke as he was staring at Hinata before she gave a sheepish look herself to Hinata.</p><p>"I'm sorry to appear out of nowhere…," she began tentatively, "but currently I'm in OB-GYN rotation and Professor Kakashi ordered me to ask this thing from you," she looked at Sasuke, "or Sai. And I couldn't seem to find Sai in pediatric ward so I went to anesthesiology to find you… and I find you here." She lightly waved around between them, second corridor after the one with the said department on one of the walls.</p><p>Misinterpreting Sakura's intention, Hinata reflexively took a small step behind. "Ah, umm, I'll be waiting at the cafeteria?"</p><p>"No, No!" Sakura instantly exclaimed, "You don't have to. I'm just going to be quick…but it'd be better if we go to the café instead together then? I'll buy you both coffee."</p><p>Sasuke didn't even got the chance to voice his opinion on the matter when Hinata instantly gave Sakura a reply. "Okay." Widening her eyes, she immediately looked at Sasuke, "Okay?"</p><p>Slightly shaking his head, he turned around all the while slightly smirking. "Let's go then," he said, leading the group toward the café.</p><p>Orderly adjusting themselves in line inside the in-hospital café, Hinata's ears perked up as she watched Sakura confidently ordered her drink and Sasuke's. "One hot cappuccino and iced americano." She glanced at Sasuke idly. "Americano, right?"</p><p>Sasuke gave a slight nod. Sakura looked at Hinata with a friendly smile. "What about you, Hinata?"</p><p>Hinata nibbled on her lip out of habit. "Caramel macchiato, please."</p><p>Sakura nodded eagerly and winked at the brunette barista. "You heard her." Sakura's green eyes wandered about the tables and stools arranged inside the café then locked at the unoccupied table of four near the window. "There, let's sit."</p><p>"Okay, so, Sasuke," Sakura began after the three had seated; Hinata next to Sasuke, and her opposite of him. "I've asked about the correlation between HER2, ER, PR, and Ki-67 to their respective treatment regimens to Professor Kakashi and then he just—"</p><p>Hinata immediately felt left out. She had tried to listen to their conversation that indeed must be beneficial for her, particularly for her future OB-GYN rotation, but unfortunately her self-consciousness overwhelmed her that she couldn't seem to focus and instead she was observing Sakura (all the while floundering to maintain her watchful eyes under subtle level). The girl was really… attractive. Her overall appearance was bright in a very good way that only complemented her bright personality. No wonder that she was one of the famous female students from their year. Hinata could only guess how many residents had taken notice of her beauty and probably had made a move on her. Involuntarily she wondered if Sasuke had the same opinion… moreover they had assigned in the same group multiple times, so it was no wonder if they got <em>this </em>close. This close for Sakura to know his usual drink. Inwardly she felt greatly uncomfortable. She just wanted to stalk out of the café and go home alone, she couldn't stand the two converse almost too intimately.</p><p>The pager vibrated.</p><p>"Ah, it's our order," said Sakura, clearly in a tone she wasn't inclined to interrupt their <em>heated </em>discussion.</p><p>"I'll go," Hinata said easily, in need of a breather watching the two alternately passing remarks.</p><p>Coming back with their drinks on a tray, Hinata caught a glimpse of them sharing a <em>knowing </em>gaze. Sasuke had given a slight nod to a smiling Sakura. <em>What the hell?</em> Inwardly she cringed, she wasn't one to… curse, really. From a very tiny part of her brain, she supposed leaving their table not more than two minutes was probably a huge mistake. Or not, whatever.</p><p>And then there was an uninvited pair joining in their table. Sasuke had a lot of friends, surprise.</p><p>"We can join you three, can we?" One of the pair was a blonde haired girl that she couldn't recall her name was even until she sat opposite of her.</p><p>The other one was a male student with the palest complexion out of the five of them and black hair to contrast. Sai pulled a stool from nearby table and sat on the empty side between her and the blonde. "Oh, hi, Hinata."</p><p>"S-Sai-kun."</p><p>The turquoise eyes of the blonde widened marginally, taking in the sight of someone she wasn't familiar with. "So, you are Hinata! I'm Ino, Yamanaka Ino." Ino reached out her hand.</p><p>Hinata took the offered hand shyly. "Hi I-Ino, I'm Hyuuga… Hinata."</p><p>"No, you can't join," Sasuke argued adamantly (a tad bit too late), eyeing the shaking hands. "We are about to finish."</p><p>If Ino were to sit next to Sasuke, she would have bump him on the shoulder, instead she did it to Sakura. "Ah, Sasuke, no fun! I can join you, riiight Sakura?"</p><p>Sakura rolled her eyes. "Whatever, Ino."</p><p>Ino clapped her hands, eyeing everyone. "Ah, this is like our study group reunion."</p><p>Hinata looked at Sasuke, trying to conceal her surprise. "Study group?" she whispered, but failed to be unheard by the others.</p><p>Sasuke rubbed his nape, immediately regretting from agreeing to Sakura—or actually it was Hinata—for a coffee in the first place. "It was more like an… accident."</p><p>"Accident?" Ino countered, feigning hurt. "Pretty long lasting for an accident. Was it four weeks? Three weeks? I kinda miss it actually."</p><p>"We were being used, actually," Sai added nonchalantly.</p><p>"Sai," Sasuke almost snarled.</p><p>"Really?" Sakura joining in, "Whoa, Sasuke, I can't believe—"</p><p>And Hinata could only dart her eyes from one to the other as they spoke alternately or sometimes simultaneously. Somehow they looked so… close. Like they were some group of long time best friends. Even Sasuke seemed natural to be a part of the group. He would smirk, or scoff, or shake his head in response to the other three's bickers. All her life, she had only the boy next to him and Naruto as someone to call as best friends. Naruto must have a lot of close friends in his university, she idly recalled someone named Shikamaru. Even Sasuke had friends other than her… apparently. Looking at the three's interaction with Sasuke taking a part, she wondered how would it feel to have close friends more than she already had now.</p><p>She ignored the lurking nasty feelings she recognized as envy and pushed them to the back of her mind, and keenly observed the people around her with a smile from time to time. Granted, the smiles reached her eyes more often than not.</p><p>While she was too absorbed into the interaction before her, the lingering glances Sasuke gave her went unnoticed by her as the receiver. Meanwhile the other three had varying levels of knowing gaze that also went unnoticed by the two quiet dark haired.</p><p>After Hinata had the last sip of her macchiato, Sasuke stood. "Let's go, Hinata."</p><p>Slightly nonplussed, Hinata looked at him before glancing at the other three. "Ah, right away?"</p><p>Now he had kicked back his stool under the table. "Yes, let's go."</p><p>"O-okay." Slowly she stood, shouldering her bag, she looked at Sakura, smiling brightly. "Thank you for the coffee, Sakura."</p><p>Smiling herself, Sakura waved a hand airily. "No probs, I'm the one to thank you honestly."</p><p>Hinata turned her eyes to the other two. "It was nice talking to you two, Sai-kun, Ino."</p><p>Ino replied her with a grin. "Pleasure is mine, Hinata, pleasure is mine."</p><p>Hinata gave a last smile to all of them before turning away to follow where Sasuke had gone.</p><p>Watching the dark haired pair exiting the café, it was rather obvious to the three of them when Sasuke deliberately slowed his pace and nodded idly (outwardly, though they knew better he did so thoroughly) to something the girl had said.</p><p>Ino rested her chin on one palm, her eyes focused to the way Sasuke was looking at Hinata. "He is definitely enamored."</p><p>Sai gave a nonchalant nod while Sakura escaped an imperceptible sigh. "Obviously."</p><hr/><p>"Sakura is really nice," Hinata mused after the two exited the main entrance of the hospital.</p><p>Looking at her from the corner of his eyes, Sasuke lifted an eyebrow. "She was tolerable…most of the times." He cleared his throat. "…And the other two?"</p><p>"They.. they are nice too. Now I know where you went all those times." Hinata laughed somewhat indignantly.</p><p>His lips twisted on one corner. "Surprisingly I didn't need to explain myself. They backed me up."</p><p>Her laughter turned sincere. "Some good friends you have."</p><p>"Friends is an overstatement."</p><p>Hinata gasped. "You haven't seen yourself from my point of view! Your face literally read 'friends' when you were with them."</p><p>Sasuke shook his head out of amusement. "Whatever you say, Hinata," he relented. "They are your friends too, then."</p><p>"I… I hope we'll get along, yeah. I hope I see more of them."</p><p>"That was only a start. Won't be long until you hope you see less of them."</p><p>"Sasuke!" Hinata slapped his shoulder playfully—although with tad too much force.</p><p>Sasuke reflexively rubbed the spot with the other hand and groaned. Not out of pain, but out of amusement to give the response she deserved.</p><p>"But Sakura is really pretty, don't you think?"</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>Hinata shook her head slowly. "Not just pretty… she is really attractive."</p><p>Sasuke snorted. "If you say so."</p><p>"I was asking your opinion."</p><p>He halted to have a full sight of her face. Eyebrows knitted together and lips tugged slightly downwards, Hinata made a halt and returned the stare. Something threatened to tug the corners of his lips. "You are jealous."</p><p>Her eyes widened incredulously. "What? No, you want to date. And Sakura is the best candidate." She nodded to herself. "So good luck dating her," she finished before starting ahead.</p><p>"You're right."</p><p>Hinata halted instantly. Slowly she turned to face him, face unreadable. "Yeah, you go date her, it's not long since we left. It's likely for her to be still in the café. I'm going home now." She turned to start walking.</p><p>Before she was out of reach, Sasuke grasped her wrist. "No, I'm taking you home." Tugging her to follow his relatively leisure pace, slowly his hand slid down to hold her hand palm to palm. Hinata dragged her feet and let him hold her hand without so much resistance.</p><p>"You're right," he repeated. "I want to date. That's why it's not Sakura I'm taking home with."</p><p>Oh how he hoped she got the fucking mean.</p><p>He was too focused dragging her with him he didn't notice the red hue suffusing to both cheeks of hers.</p><p>After both settled inside of their car, Hinata pondered aloud, "What should we have for dinner?"</p><p>Sasuke gave the girl a quick glance. "No particular preference at the moment."</p><p>Hinata decided to look through her phone. "Hmm, let's see."</p><p>Pulling the handbreak before the red light, Sasuke turned to face her. Her brow were taut in concentration and lips slightly puckered and very much kissable. Raising one corner of his lips without any restraint, he took the time to look at her thoroughly.</p><p>
  <em>You haven't seen us from my point of view.</em>
</p><hr/><p>The week had passed almost too fast. Although the week had been relatively uneventful, the habit going back and forth between their faculty building and hospital and home had been taking its toll on them they practically dragged their body without much awareness needed. Rolling back to another Saturday, the two settled on the rug working on their second piece of pressed flowers. <em>Her</em>, to be exact.</p><p>Mouth slightly agape, carefully Hinata arranged the violets and cherry blossoms petal by petal into neat order based on the shades. "Sasuke, carefully pluck two petals more, please," she ordered gently, beckoning the scattered cherry blossoms with her chin.</p><p>Sasuke did without another words, and he did so carefully. "Here."</p><p>"There," she said with a growing smile, satisfied with the finishing touch. "You really don't want a book tag?"</p><p>"Not interested," he said with a chuckle, eyes closely looking at her face. Even with her short hair, there were still unruly strands that needed to be tucked behind the ear. Or it was only a reason he created to justify what he was about to do.</p><p>"Your hair incessantly get in the way," he said gently, and tucked the strands of her hair behind the ear, also gently, but the movement was confident. And it felt so damn right.</p><p>Sasuke watched the side of her face and noticed the growing curve of her lips into a subtle smile. Sighing softly, she finally turned to face him, eyes searching his own. "Thanks," she whispered.</p><p>It all went almost smoothly afterwards on his part. Relying solely to the whispering demands to just fucking do it, slowly he leaned toward her face, and for the second time giving Hinata enough time if she had a change of heart in the last moment.</p><p>Surprisingly, she didn't this time.</p><p>His eyes widened marginally when she closed her eyes and leaned forward tentatively. He ignored the unsolicited sympathetic reflex that spread immediate nervous signals to heighten his visceral function, his heart was no exception. Closing his own eyes, he braced for the impact in formidable anticipation. It didn't take long, almost too immediate before he could brace himself completely. At first, it felt like a faint brush of air until he pressed his lips into hers, and hers to his—surprisingly. Even with sufficient pressure between them, her lips felt too soft and too hesitant. He wanted more.</p><p>He couldn't grasp how long their lips touched, he didn't register at first when they both pulled away slightly, but he knew for a fact that it was too damn short.</p><p>"You like me," she breathed, opening her eyes to look at the space between them.</p><p>It didn't register to his head at first that he just had his first kiss. And hers too, if he hadn't been thinking wrong all this time… It took all his might not to kiss her again. Quickly calculating the state he was in with slightly clouded mind, he deduced he was shuffling on a thin ice right now; whatever they had right now was too delicate. "You do too," he managed, looking at her lips.</p><p>"…As friends."</p><p>Darting his eyes to look at her face as a whole, he asked, "Why did you kiss me back?" Technically their lips met midway, but he had indeed initiated it.</p><p>Hinata nibbled on her lip before looking at him in the eye. She was floundering and whatever answer she had never meet the open air.</p><p>"Hinata," he prodded, hoping he managed to do so gently enough.</p><p>Hinata opened her lips slightly. Then closed them, pursing them into a thin line before opening them again. "…I'm afraid, Sasuke."</p><p>In all honesty, he was afraid too. He needed to remind himself that this was a big leap not only to him, but also to her. The wall they needed to overcome was terribly enormous. Frankly, it took both of them in order to succeed. They might be in the middle of putting their friendship at a precarious peak of some cliff, or little did they know, they might have already done it.</p><p>Releasing an almost imperceptible breath, he affirmed, "Don't be." To both of themselves, if he were to admit it aloud.</p><p>She smiled, then pulled away completely, reattempting to finish her previous occupation; arranging the petals. In his dazed state, he missed the hint of her being distracted herself while doing so.</p><p>He didn't know what had become of them after this… occurrence. He also didn't really register when he was blankly staring at the wall before him. She pulled away too immediately, and his brain wasn't working at all. It felt… too surreal.</p><p>But then, when she finally turned her head to face him with a smile that somehow he assumed to not quite reach her eyes, his mind easily focused to the sight before him; her—Hinata as a whole.</p><p>"Fancy a movie at the cinema? Tomorrow evening?" she asked rapidly, almost breathlessly, he almost missed the hint of quiver in her tone.</p><p>He released a sigh he didn't register to be holding. Nodding slowly as a half smile growing on his face he grunted gently, "Hn."</p><p>He really was a coward.</p><hr/><p>
  <em>Sasuke's gaze lingered to the receding indigo head, the girl was smiling to the barista as she accepted the straws offered.</em>
</p><p>"<em>You </em>like<em> her." It wasn't even a question. It was a statement. And there was something in the way Sakura said the word 'like', as if it weren't even the word she had intended. "</em>A lot<em>."</em></p><p>
  <em>Sasuke didn't respond right away, instead his eyes followed the girl only to tear his gaze away when she walked the length of the square table and settled the tray on the table. Initially Sakura had no expectation for him to respond. But then after noticing Hinata was busy with distributing their drinks, Sasuke gave a faint nod and Sakura smiled knowingly.</em>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>ol·fac·to·ry nerve</p><p>each of the first pair of cranial nerves, transmitting impulses to the brain from the smell receptors in the mucous membrane of the nose</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>For the umpteenth time, Hinata looked over her reflection on the mirror to (re)evaluate her appearance from head to toe. There seemed to be something wrong about it. Her short hair was down and she couldn't really do much about it. Some hairpins maybe? Or… maybe not. She had applied very subtle glowy pinkish make up, and had she been not too self-conscious about everything, it matched perfectly with her dusty pink floral wrap dress that extended to her knees.</p><p>
  <em>Was this too much?</em>
</p><p>If before she never bat an eye on how she looked in front of Sasuke, now she desperately wanted to look pretty in front of him. But maybe she was trying too hard and she was anxious that it would show. Sakura was pretty and she didn't even look like she was trying at all…</p><p>Shaking her head exaggeratedly, she curled her fingers into fists.</p><p>
  <em>No. I have no time to be self-conscious now. Not now.</em>
</p><p>Not ever.</p><p>
  <em>But why am I trying so hard?</em>
</p><p>Wandering about her reflection on the mirror, her eyes settled on her lips. The memory from yesterday flowed inside her mind obstacle-free. How she realized he was leaning toward her. And how for the first time she let her instinct take the lead, finally giving in to her feelings and realizing the choice was hers to make. Then they kissed…</p><p>….<em>She didn't know how to respond after the… the… kiss. So she quick-scanned something she needed to do to divert her thought and found the perfect alibi; arranging the petals then rearranging them again. While distractedly doing so, she waited for him to explain whatever he needed to explain. Shouldn't they like… started to date after the kiss? He didn't even ask her if she wanted them to take a step ahead. He hadn't even been clear enough about his intention. (All she needed was some verbal reassurances). He just kissed her.</em></p><p>
  <em>She waited even until her work was done multiple times that it might looked suspiscious had he been not distracted himself, and needed to be pressed immediately. But hearing nothing from him minutes after minutes, she mentally screamed. So he was going to be silent about it then? Was the kiss even genuine? Was he joking with her right now?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It must have been her patience giving up (despite knowing herself to be patient almost all the time). Or Sasuke was just utterly frustrating and… dare she say…a coward. The next thing she knew, she did ask him for a date. She did. Mustering all the composure that had left within her not to sound too apprehensive and nervous when asking him. A tremble or two might have escaped though. And he just "hn"-ed her. He couldn't be serious, could he?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She was the one denying the whole thing and now she was the one to ask him for a date. Some resolution she had.</em>
</p><p>Giving a whole last look to her appearance, she reached for her bottle of perfume. Pushing a spray or two to her whole body, she frowned as the bottle turned out giving its last content. This particular perfume had been her favored selectionsince high school and she never did change her preference since. She loved the scent of roses; it contains freshness into it in a delicate way and somehow enticing. Her physical and vibes lacked confidence, playing with scents to make her somehow confident was the least thing she could do. Giving a final sigh, shouldering her bag, and still holding the mauve tinted bottle while doing so, she exited her room then.</p><p>The next seconds Sasuke exited his room. It was as if he <em>did </em>wait for her door to be opened first. Couldn't stop herself from giving a thorough look to his appearance as a whole, she suddenly found him to be really attractive. Not that she hadn't ever found him to be one, but it suddenly struck her full-force. He was <em>really </em>handsome. He was dressed in a casual gray t-shirt and rolled up to the elbows long-sleeved navy shirt with black trousers. His hair was rare to follow the command of his hands, so he had let them the usual unruly style. In overall, his appearance was boyish, yet neat and just right.</p><p>Hinata blinked twice, finally realizing her state of slacked jaw. The feel of holding the bottle also finally came to her senses. Stiffly she walked toward the counter then proceeded to drop the bottle within the bin, somehow aware of his watchful eyes. Straightening up she looked at him, not completely surprised he hadn't moved an inch. Even his eyes were locked to hers.</p><p>She felt scrutinized and instantly self-conscious. But irritation toward her flatmate's lack of reaction overwhelmed everything. She felt one eyelid twitch. "Well? Are you ready?"</p><p>Sasuke gulped forcibly. She felt another eyelid twitch. "You…," he began, then gulped again before saying stiffly, "…look good."</p><p>Her eyes widened and her cheeks felt warm in a sudden that would only indicate one thing; she was blushing. Then he blushed too although faintly but it was apparent. "Thanks… Sasuke," she mumbled.</p><p>Sasuke cleared his throat and looked away before making his way toward the front door. "Let's go," he said, slipping in his feet to his sneakers.</p><p>Biting on her lip, she stepped closer to slip on her own flatshoes. Standing next to him as he opened the door she frowned. Maybe it was time for her to look for some heels.</p><p>Watching movies in the cinema was never really a thing for the two when cooped up inside the comfort of her blanket (always) and even with the squinting on her laptop screen (sometimes Sasuke's) was more comfortable to them. Needless to say that it wasn't a treat though, but the two always keep it at minimun. They had no particular preference for the genre, both liked to watch mystery or crime movies with some action from here and there, enjoyed slice of life from time to time, and even Sasuke could handle a rather cringy romance (he actually did enjoy well made and subtle romance ones but not to the level where he would freely recommend her to watch with him, it was always her area of expertise) telling himself that he was of help as the best friend that he was to the slightly emotionally unstable one week each month for Hinata. Having learned menstrual cycle himself and knowing all the changes in woman's body due to the bleeding week, it was the least he could do.</p><p>They had decided to walk toward the cinema and taking their time while doing so. The evening was chilly, but significantly warmer than the previous nights of winter. The majority of people had skipped wearing thick jackets and opted to wear more fashionable ones. The streets were lined by the blossoming <em>sakura</em> trees, with bluish gleam on the petals as the evening went on.</p><p>In short, it was beautiful.</p><p>Hinata had always liked spring. In fact, she favored each season for different reasons that attached to each of them. She had always liked the orangish atmosphere of an autumn, everything looked bright and just the perfect temperature before reaching on the colder season. She had always loved to see the snow in the winter, and having her birthday at the particular season was the more reason for it to have a special place in her heart. Spring was the most beautiful of all; each walk or ride in between the streets was a treat to the eye. As far as her eyes could see, there would be <em>sakura</em> and other flowers blossoming from their rest the previous season. And then there come summer. If she could be honest, summer was her least favorite due to her sensitive skin and the ever applying sticky sunscreen all over her body. Everyday was always hot and sweaty. But thinking about summer, she realized she had always felt the happiest despite all the troubles it held.</p><p>Because it was the longest holiday season of all year, she reasoned.</p><p>She got the chance to spend her time with her family, her friends (she frowned, there were only Naruto and Sasuke), and her… neighbor (again, Sasuke).</p><p>Blushing, she realized another thing; Sasuke's birthday was in the summer. Something she realized she had always anticipated in the summer was to find a birthday present for Sasuke. She had all her free time at home, hence more time to look for something to give him. It was also thrilling to anticipate his response for he rarely gave any response to almost everything. One day she had given him a mug and he was visibly taken aback before a smirk replaced his slighty parted mouth. Last year when she gave him two sets of earphones, he looked dazzled, somehow looked like he didn't realize he didn't have one (or lost temporarily or permanently she hadn't asked him yet) at the moment. Although just a simple 'thanks' he gave her, she knew he was thankful, because it was rare to see him without them on from that point onwards.</p><p>"Hinata."</p><p>Hinata blinked. They had stood in front of a big movie poster. Having no idea why he had called her she looked at him wide-eyed. "Yes?"</p><p>With both hands secured within his pockets, Sasuke beckoned the movie poster with his elbow. "This one?"</p><p>Pale eyes instantly looked over toward the movie poster. It was a dark comedy about two people disguising themselves as doctors to violate their patients' privacy…</p><p>Hinata tried to roll her eyes but knew better it would fail giving out its purpose anyway so she withheld. She pivoted on her heels to go into the queae to buy their tickets. "We've discussed this," she said.</p><p>"Just checking in if you're still here."</p><p>Hinata looked over her shoulder and offered a glare to a smirking Sasuke. But it only made her heart going crazy. Because he was so… Sasuke. One might find this to be weird, but there was no other word to describe him. He was so the Sasuke that had always been with her; at the apartment, at the lecture hall, at the ER, at his car, at his house or hers, and just at almost everything.</p><p>It suddenly felt very real.</p><p>His smirk faltered slightly as her eyes definitely had stopped "glaring". She didn't know what her eyes had showed, but now looking at him with the frantic beating of her heart and the somehow pleasant twisting feeling inside her stomach; it wasn't so difficult to distinguish her feelings now.</p><p>She was in love with him.</p><p>For how long? She didn't dare to dig.</p><p>How deep? She didn't even know if there was any base at all.</p><p>Turning around abruptly that she almost bump someone's back at her front she exhaled with a slight quiver.</p><p>It felt so real.</p><p>What were they really now? What was actually happening between them? Were they dating? Was he even in love with her? He did confirmed he liked her, but was it enough? Was it worth the risk?</p><p>Everything went in a blur afterwards. The movie was something she had picked actually but she forgot whatever the main characters were aiming for. Her mind was rushing with so much thoughts she didn't actually enjoy their "date"—or whatever, it didn't feel that different from their usuals. No holding hands despite her heightened anticipation everytime their fingers brushed. After a brief stroll, they decided to have dinner at the curry house, it was also quick; nothing happened.</p><p>Even until they reached their door a little before ten nothing happened between them. Not even the most anticipated <em>thing </em>she had anticipated since the start of her waking that morning.</p><p>A kiss.</p><p>Maybe it was her fault for not initiating and too much expecting from Sasuke.</p><p>Or maybe it was her fault for falling for him too deep and too easily with no guarantee if he felt the same.</p><p>Walking toward her room with her back facing him she slowed before stopping hesitantly. "Sasuke," she called softly, looking at him over her shoulder.</p><p>With one dark eyebrow slightly lifted, Sasuke averted his eyes from her relatively small feet to look at her face. "Hm?"</p><p>Hinata bit her lip before she blinked. "N-nothing," she stammered before turning her head away.</p><p>Her light footsteps echoed down the hall before mumbled by her door when she finally closed it behind her.</p><p>Sasuke stared blankly in her wake and his innards felt hollow even worsened as she went further into the confinement of her door.</p><p>He felt robbed. He didn't quite know what was taken though.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke opened his eyes to the annoying sound of his alarm. Groggily his hand creeping around the sheet for the device in action while his mouth growling a series of curses. It was only the start of another Monday and he was already <em>fucking </em>tired. He didn't even know if his date with Hinata last night was going well or not. And he was <em>fucking </em>tired reassuring himself that he was somehow satisfied when in truth he was not. He was doing things the usual way because what things needed to be different anyway? They had been best friends that had come to terms with their feelings somehow and he <em>fucking </em>didn't know what was supposed to happen next.</p><p>It was also weird not to hear knocking on his door. It wasn't their habit anymore somehow, thanks to his certain previous doings. Although it didn't feel quite settling on his gut, he guessed it was time to finally be independent on this particular area; waking up. But due to that, he got the chance to have full breakfast with her so he couldn't really complain. And sometimes he also prepared something for both although the results were far from when she was the one preparing the meals. She always appreciated his efforts nonetheless and with honest comments too. It felt nice.</p><p>No, it felt <em>terribly</em> nice.</p><p>After taking a brief yet soothing shower and dressed in the usual style of attending lectures (shirt and trousers with a touch or two of some other thing), he opened his door to the delectable smell of something savory; egg, ketchup, and cheese were the most prominent of all.</p><p>Hinata looked over her shoulder briefly to the sound of door being opened. "Ah, I'm making <em>omurice</em> and, well, initially I wanted to prep them into our lunch so I guess it's banana for breakfast." She put a perfectly folded <em>omurice</em> to a lunchbox before looking over to him. "If that's fine with you."</p><p>He didn't know why it took a pause and sitting on a chair first before he finally answered. Maybe it was only his brain that still hadn't quite grasped of him waking up. Or maybe because it was the sight of <em>her </em>cooking a meal for <em>him </em>first thing in the morning. Or the fact that he wanted to do something about the smile on her face.</p><p>"It's fine with me," he responded at last.</p><p>"Good," she replied, closing their lunchboxes with their lids still with that damn smile adorning her face.</p><p>Sasuke stood to reach for the banana on the counter when Hinata brought both lunchboxes to their table. She reached out a hand to take one banana. "Will you be in a shift tonight?"</p><p>He darted his eyes to hers from the lunchboxes, munching silently. "Yes, why?"</p><p>Hinata quickly shook her head. "Nothing. J-just wondering."</p><p>"You can use my car going home if you'd like."</p><p>"No, it's fine."</p><p>Sasuke lifted an eyebrow. "Okay, then.."</p><p>"Don't skip dinner…" she mumbled, eyes locked to her peeled banana before she bit a mouthful.</p><p>Smirking he assured, "I won't." Then he took one lunchbox to put it inside his backpack. "Let's go?"</p><p>Hinata nodded and took her own lunchbox before following him to the door.</p><hr/><p>It was the gentle shake on his shoulder that woke him up. He opened his eyes to the sight of an angel. <em>No, </em>better; it was Hinata.</p><p>He immediately closed his eyes shut and groaned. "<em>Fuck,"</em> he muttered then opened an eye to look at her sympathetic countenance. "Sorry. I overslept, didn't I?"</p><p>He sat upright and looked around blearily, noting he was still on the rearmost bunk bed he had crashed upon last night—no, it was this morning. Hinata extracted a pouch from her bag. "I brought toiletries. I didn't bring any change of clothes though.."</p><p>Sasuke shook his head and looked at her gratefully, taking the pouch. "No, it's fine. Thanks a lot, Hinata."</p><p>What could he do without her?</p><p>Last night shift was hell and he still had obligation to Professor Kakashi thanks for bumping with him after yesterday's lecture. That damn professor could hire some assistant or make him official instead of using his "authority" to ask—more like demand—him for help in his research. He couldn't really say it wasn't beneficial to him, though, but it'd be better to earn some cash while doing so…</p><p>Hinata chuckled softly at him yawning before straightening her back. "I think you should go to the toilet now… it's already seven thirty."</p><p>"Right," he said, standing up. Walking toward the exit, he stopped to look at her briefly, a question had touched the tip of his tongue.</p><p>"I'll be waiting here…," she announced softly.</p><p>Sasuke nodded, leaving the doctors' mess feeling contented.</p><hr/><p>After he went back inside the doctors' mess, feeling somewhat refreshed, the two paced toward the faculty building, hence squeezing the time needed to cross the not so elaborate streets from the hospital in ten minutes remaining before the lecture starts. It occurred to him suddenly that she did "sacrifice" her time and sweat (figuratively, as the morning was still considered chilly) to bring him his toiletries and wake him inside the hospital. <em>If </em>they were indeed best friends and living together, it was probably something normal to do though he wasn't entirely certain if months ago he would even come up with the idea.</p><p>So this was how it felt to have someone—other than your immediate relatives—taking care of you. And it was definitely different now. He'd also do the same to her, that was for certain.</p><p>They took the seats at the front and Hinata nudged his shoulder with a can of coffee. He couldn't be thankful enough for her that day. He struggled to stay awake in the first session and the lectures were interjected by a quiet lunch in the building cafeteria. The second session was …better. But then he remembered his approaching appointment with Kakashi. He sighed. Could he just go home with Hinata? He glanced at the girl next to him taking notes diligently. It was guilt that he felt at the moment. And he had passed the phase of not admitting.</p><p>Inclining his torso toward her, the delicate scent of roses that he had grown to be fond of brushed his olfactory nerves. Taking a second to inhale softly, he murmured, "Hinata." He immediately wanted to call her name again for no reason.</p><p>Hinata turned her head slightly and immediately blushed. "Y-yes?"</p><p>He inched away slightly, feeling overwhelmed at a sudden. "Uhm, well," he mumbled before clearing his throat. "I don't think I can go home right after the lecture. Kakashi-sensei asked for my help…" he trailed off, wasn't sure how to continue.</p><p>Hinata blinked. "Oh, okay… That's fine, Sasuke." She smiled. "Good luck, I hope it won't take too long." Feeling self-conscious of what she had just said, her eyes widened. "I-I mean you really need a rest."</p><p>Sasuke nodded idly. "Yeah, thanks."</p><p>After the lecture, Hinata waved him goodbye and he went straight to his professor's office on the third floor. He knocked thrice first and opened the door after a mumbled "come in" from the inside.</p><p>Professor Kakashi looked up at him over the rim of his laptop. "Well, well, thank you for coming, Sasuke."</p><p>"Hn."</p><p>There were bad news and good news for agreeing to this research project of Kakashi. He'd start with the good news; an attempt to lift his mood slightly. The good news were a lot actually. First, it earned him the professor's favor. Meaning, Kakashi most likely would ask him for help again in future research, which would look good on his CV. Also, it would be easy for him to ask for recommendation letter to apply residency moreover if the residency was his department—which was OB-GYN. Highly unlikely for him to apply on the particular department, but it wasn't wrong to be safe either. Second, he got paid, surprisingly. It was a shock and a relief and he had more respect to Kakashi instantly.</p><p>Then came the bad news. The whole thing would take at least a month, and he was obliged to go to his office for their "session" at least twice a week. Which was <em>good </em>then, twice a week night shift plus another two days to see Kakashi's languid demeanor. Good, indeed. The fact that his first session at his office now hadn't ended even when the clock had definitely showed 9.30 PM, Sasuke was unwilling to foresee the next sessions to come.</p><p>The two walked toward the building parking lot at a little after ten. Kakashi reached his car first as it turned out it was parked in the way to reach Sasuke's. "See you on…?"</p><p>"Not tomorrow," Sasuke replied immediately, "Last night I was in a shift."</p><p>"Okay, day after tomorrow, then. Good evening, Sasuke."</p><p>Sasuke bowed curtly. "Good evening, Kakashi-sensei."</p><p>He didn't remember much the ride on the way home. And he could only hear the lulling of his bed inside his room as he kicked off his shoes languidly. He noted no other presence in the living room and her door was closed. Nodding to himself idly, he opened his door and crashed to the bed not bothering to close his door first and leaving it ajar.</p><p>He silently wondered something was off but he couldn't put a finger what was.</p><hr/><p>The next morning, he exited his room only to find out he was alone. It was already seven thirty and Hinata was not one to wake up late. Unless she had been in a night shift…</p><p>Sasuke extracted his phone from his trousers pocket and called her. When she answered, he couldn't stop himself. "Were you in a shift? Why didn't you go home?"</p><p>"Uhm, yes," there was a pause and some rustling from her end. "I-I overslept.."</p><p>Well, wasn't it funny that they took turns in oversleeping. He even skipped the teasing even though the words were already at the tip of his tongue. "Do you need me to bring your toiletries or clothes?"</p><p>Her reply came immediately. "No! I mean, no, I'm fine. I've prepared them last night."</p><p>Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "You've prepared to oversleep in the doctors' mess? …Why?"</p><p>"No, Sasuke, don't worry. I'll tell you when we meet, okay? I need to go to the bathroom."</p><p>"Well, okay—"</p><p>She hung up.</p><p>"—see you," he finished lamely, narrowing his eyes to her number on the screen.</p><p>He met Hinata inside the lecture hall, seated at one of the chairs in the mid row, which was unusual for them, and she did save a seat for him next to her. She must have arrived at the lecture hall earlier than they usually did. He'd tried to prod into talking about the matter on the phone call, but she didn't spare a glance his way. And Sasuke wasn't one to be boisterous just to get her attention at the moment, so the only solution was him paying attention to the lecture.</p><p>Their usual lunch was quiet. But today was even quieter if that even possible. Most of the times it didn't bother him, but today it bothered him a great deal.</p><p>"So….," he started, eyeing Hinata playing with the remnants of her salad, "why?"</p><p>Hinata gave him a quick glance before her pale eyes refocused to her salad. "Hm?"</p><p>"Why did you—"</p><p>Her phone rang. Damn right, it couldn't ring at better times apparently. Hinata mouthed a sorry as he answered the call. "Father?"</p><p><em>Fine, it's her father, </em>he mused dryly.</p><p>"I don't think so… Yes, I did. Nothing to worry about… And yes, he hasn't come home since Monday."</p><p>Who hadn't come home? Neji? And how did she know?</p><p>"Don't worry, I'll make sure to pass the message to him so he can confirm it to you."</p><p>Sasuke narrowed his eyes to his watch. <em>Shit. </em>Lunch time was over. Hinata too glanced at the watch encircling her left wrist. Still with the phone fixated on one ear, Hinata stood then pushed back the chair, beckoning Sasuke to follow.</p><p>He stood, watching her keenly as she frowned at something his father had said. "It's in July… I think."</p><p>The two had walked back toward the lecture hall and she was still on the phone.</p><p>"I just had lunch, Father." Hinata glanced at him briefly. "Yes, with Sasuke. The lecture starts in five minutes."</p><p>They sat on their previous seats which fortunately hadn't been occupied at the moment.</p><p>"Okay, love you too." Hinata finally put down her phone and sighed with a tender smile.</p><p>Sasuke glanced at her, feigning his curiosity with the activity of extracting his laptop. "What is it?"</p><p>Hinata bent down to extract her notebook and pencil case. "Neji's incoming medical board exam."</p><p>Dark eyes widened, amazed. "He'll register on the first wave? It's in August, right?"</p><p>Hinata straightened her back and nodded eagerly, looking proud. "Yes! We couldn't be more proud."</p><p>Sasuke couldn't stop himself from smirking, feeling somewhat proud from… knowing Neji. And doing good job at that. "Good for him. What's in July? The registration?"</p><p>"Yes," she replied when the side door at the front opened to reveal the lecturer for the second season. "I think," she continued in a murmur.</p><p>Sasuke nodded idly as his mind subsconsciously counted the remaining months until the registration. He leaned his back to the back of his chair and sighed to two things that just registered in his mind. First, it was only three more months before Neji could register to his medical board exam. Second, so much for a lot of things to discuss, the matter from their phone call was left untouched.</p><p>After the lecture, things hadn't been easy on his part. Hinata had quickly tried to explain in a haste to him that she needed to find Neji. It baffled him as he didn't think it would be that urgent to find him right away. But because she did look like she was in a bind, he did let her go without further questions.</p><p>It reminded him of someone.</p><p>So it was easier to let her go even though he was dying to do otherwise.</p><p>Indeed, it reminded him of someone—</p><p>and karma was a bitch.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>the eyes (1,2)</p><p>(1) a pair of globular organs in the head through which people see;</p><p>(2) used to refer to someone's opinion or attitude toward something</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke found himself working on Kakashi's research and only when his stomach grumbled out of hunger did he finally realize it was already nine and Hinata hadn't come home. What could possibly the two cousins have to be talked about until this late? He glanced at his phone and no message had arrived since he replied to Neji's text in the afternoon. He had just eased his feet off his shoes when his phone vibrated. It was from Neji.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>Did something happen?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>Lifting an eyebrow, he immediately replied.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>What did?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>He pocketed back his phone and had a quick scan to the living room, feeling eerily alone inside the apartment. Briefly he wondered was this what Hinata had been feeling back then almost a year ago.</p><p>And something… something about their apartment was off. The very same thing he had tried to pinpoint from the previous day but to no avail.</p><p>After he took a shower, there was still no reply from Neji. Having no better thing to do he started searching through files on his laptop to have something to work on. And sure did, the file named "For Kakashi's Money" had him stop scrolling down. Reluctantly he opened the file.</p><p>And after reading a lot of references, typing a lot of sentences, then proofreading everything for hours, he stood grimly, turning around then sauntered toward the fridge, hoping to find something to eat. In all his lackluster trip toward the fridge, he managed to knock over the bin that spilled all of its content, which fortunately the one with the dry waste. Sighing (and cursing) he crouched down and began collecting all the waste and briefly caught the sight of another bin, the one supposed to have the wet waste, and found it to be practically vacant.</p><p>He felt relieved somehow. If it were that bin that he knocked over…it wouldn't make any difference anyways. He mentally thanked his schedule for making him unable to come home the past few days but found his logic to be illogical because there was Hinata still. She should have cooked something, or eaten something, or whatever that affiliated with wet waste.</p><p>So, this was weird. He narrowed his eyes and a mauve tinted glass bottle on the tiled floor caught his attention. It was definitely a perfume bottle. He turned the bottle on his hand to look at the writings on the back, instantly recalled Hinata had thrown away the bottle on Sunday before their movie date. It read <em>Midnight Rose</em>.</p><p>Rose.</p><p>Then, suddenly it clicked. And all thought about food was left forgotten.</p><p>Something was definitely off.</p><p>Instead of the usual rosy citrus he had been smelling in everything inside of his apartment, it was cheap striking citrus for the past days. Because definitely the very person holding that rosy scent wasn't around for the past days.</p><p>He was an idiot.</p><p>It occurred to him then, all the riddle he had been personally having about the scent of his apartment, turned out the answer wasn't simply because they had always bought everything citrus. It was the scent of Hinata he had been smelling all along.</p><p>This apartment was <em>theirs</em>. Without her scent around, it wasn't the same. And it struck him hard that it was Hinata that had made this very apartment was as good as home to him.</p><p>He heard his phone vibrated against the dining table. He stood immediately, crossing the space between his current position and his phone in three strides.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>She asked me to sleep in my apartment, it's been three days. I couldn't go home the past days. Did something happen?</strong>
  </em>
</p><p>Sasuke massaged his temple and immediately called her.</p><p>"Where are you?"</p><hr/><p>The bell rang when Hinata was scrolling through the TV to watch something. She really thought they did need to have a TV after all. For the past days at Neji's it felt almost nice hearing random sounds despite her not really paying attention into it. She was all alone in her cousin's apartment after all.</p><p>She glanced at the clock above the TV—just a little after eight—wondering who would come at this hour. If it were someone from school, they should've known Neji was studying and all, together with his group mates somewhere. She stood and sauntered off to get the door.</p><p>Hinata gaped at the person standing behind the door.</p><p>"Hi, Hinata," the brunette greeted simply, stepping inside after sidestepping Hinata as if it were her own place. "Neji texted me you could use some company." Her brown eyes scanned the whole place. The bin was overflowed, there was a laptop still opened on the floor near a plate of half-eaten fries, there were papers everywhere. Okay, she got to admit she was too exaggerating on that last part. "… or not." She looked over her shoulder to see Hinata approaching her tentatively. "Are you in the middle of doing some homework? I can go home, if you want."</p><p>"T-Tenten!" Hinata greeted at last after regaining her composure. She bit her lip nervously. "Maybe… I could use some company," she paused before added lowly, "…to chat."</p><p>Tenten blinked. "Okay.. why do I feel like smelling something heavy." She chuckled.</p><p>Hinata couldn't help but smile.</p><p>Tenten settled on the couch right away, pulling out a phone from the breast pocket of her denim jacket.</p><p>"Do you want to drink something?" asked Hinata, watching Tenten typed something on her phone.</p><p>Tenten glanced up briefly before refocusing back to her phone. Then she froze, eyes widened. "I think I've left some beers on the fridge last week. Could you check?"</p><p>Hinata went to the fridge to check. "There is … one left?"</p><p>Now Hinata had Tenten's full attention. "Only one?" she asked in disbelief.</p><p>Hinata glanced back inside the fridge and nodded to reaffirm.</p><p>Tenten slammed down her phone against the couch. "Damn, Neji. I'm sure I'd put five inside the fridge. Is it normal for medical students to drink beer that often?"</p><p>Hinata chuckled softly. "Well, we are still college students. Do you want the beer?"</p><p>Tenten stretched her upper body down with the help of her hand thrusting firmly on the edge of the couch to take one fries. <em>Pheww, that was hard. </em>"Yeah," she responded after putting the fries in her mouth. "I don't have class until twelve tomorrow."</p><p>Hinata nodded idly and opened the fridge again to retrieve the beer.</p><p>Taking the beer excitedly, Tenten mouthed her thanks. She immediately took a gulp after she pulled the tab on her beer. "Ah, this is nice. You want some?"</p><p>Hinata shook her head politely as she sat beside Tenten."I have class at eight..."</p><p>Tenten clicked her tongue and took another gulp. "Poor you. I should've thanked my old self for not even considering med school." She put down the beer in between her crossed legs then clapped her hands. "Okay, so what is it?"</p><p>Hinata blushed immediately and lowered her head. "I-I don't know where to begin…"</p><p>Tenten traced a line on the can surface with her thumb. "I think I remember something Neji has said some week ago." She frowned in concentration, trying to dig deeper inside her mind. "Hmm… It's Sasuke, right?"</p><p>"How much did he tell you…?" Hinata asked hesitantly.</p><p>"Let's see…" Tenten pursed her lips, deliberately putting a pensive show before smiling sadly. "I'm pretty much aware of your predicament. It's pretty much the same with us… I guess that's also why Neji told things to me."</p><p>Hinata looked up to see her face. No hint of excessive sadness. She sighed inconspicuously. They had passed the phases of grief apparently.</p><p>"You both like each other, right?" Tenten prodded, smiling encouragingly.</p><p>"Yes…" she answered hotly, face red a shade darker.</p><p>"Then, what do you fear?"</p><p>"Everything…" she began, biting her lip when Tenten narrowed her eyes. She couldn't really find the fundamental reason of her fear though. "I don't know. I mean, it could be because our friendship is at stake. Or maybe my look."</p><p>"Your <em>look</em>?"</p><p>"It could be my personality. My anxiety. My—"</p><p>"Whoa, whoa, slow there." Tenten blinked multiple times, couldn't believe the words had escaped from the prettiest girl she had ever known. Hinata was pretty, elegant, modest, and everything she wasn't. Though she was happy with how she was, she couldn't help to picture the perfect image of a woman still. And Hinata had everything one needed to be just that. And her eyes, damn, couldn't she see for herself just how fascinating those eyes were? It'd be easy to capture just anyone to be lost in that infinite depth of those eyes. She was once a victim. And if she had to admit, sometimes those same –yet very much different—pale gray eyes still had the effect on her.</p><p>"Hinata… why can't you see it yourself? I'm not in the position to babble just how pretty and beautiful you are. Because you have to see it for yourself. Sure, as cliché as it can get, nobody's perfect. But there is a reason that phrase is overused, because it is true. And you can't blame yourself to be imperfect, nobody can't. Those imperfections are what make you who you are. And if he does like—or love you for who you are, then it is only your turn to love yourself as who you are and love him as he is.</p><p>"And that friendship bullshit, yeah I know friendship breakups suck. But tell me, if what you feel now is real, do you think you both can turn to the way you used to be? I am completely certain not."</p><p>Hinata shook her head slowly.</p><p>"Yeah, you <em>can't</em> just come back. So what do you need to do now? Embrace it. Embrace what you are feeling at the moment, and do something about it. Relish while it lasts, don't fear. Who knows it lasts <em>forever</em>, or at least for a long time. Let's hope nothing bad to come out of it. But, wouldn't it be better: let's just hope for the best? I don't know this Sasuke as a person. But Neji has talked about you two like…a lot. And all I can say, he trusts this Sasuke, so do I. And I know your bond are much more than you give credit for. And you are the only one that know what you really want.</p><p>"I mean look at us, best friends, falling in love, then exes, and boom we're still best friends. Bad things do happen, it is inevitable. But, just remember you are best friend first before you are a couple."</p><p>Tenten sighed, finishing her long rant. She suddenly felt tired. Chugging down her beer, she eyed the girl beside her, clearly hesitant to voice her thought aloud. "Hit me."</p><p>Hinata's eyed widened, taken aback at getting caught hesitant to ask. "Uhm.. how did you do it with Neji?"</p><p>Tenten grinned instantly. And her smile did reach her eyes. "Simple, because we are best friends."</p><p>Hinata smiled then, rewarding her with its sincerity. Tenten couldn't help but to chuckle in relief. <em>Finally, you can see it for yourself. "</em>And about the friendship breakup thing, I guess my opinion would be biased because, well, our breakup was consensual and nothing ugly.."</p><p>Hinata laughed, her eyes twinkling with certainty. <em>Ah, this feels good.</em></p><p>"So, what do you want?" Tenten asked, smirking.</p><p>Hinata was about to answer confidently when her phone rang. It was Sasuke. Steeling her resolution, she answered.</p><p>"Where are you?" his voice asked.</p><p>Her head lowered to hide the growing smile from Tenten's line of sight. <em>Took you long enough. </em>"I'm at Neji's…"</p><p>"Why?" he asked instantly.</p><p>"I just want to," she replied impassively, and trying so hard at that when her smile only grew.</p><p>She heard Sasuke sighed. "Why, Hinata?"</p><p>"You're not the only one having '<em>things</em>' in your brain to be arranged. And I couldn't do that with you around." Hinata couldn't believe herself from saying that. She exhaled slowly and cautiously—hoping Sasuke had trouble sensing her nervousness.</p><p>"You could just tell me," he answered gently. And she wanted to hug him so much at the moment. "And what are you even thinking about?"</p><p>"And what?" she chuckled half-heartedly, ignoring his question. "Have you sleep out in one of your friends' place?"</p><p>"Yes." His answer came instantly, and no hesitation could be heard.</p><p>Hinata smiled softly. "That would be bothersome."</p><p>"I could sleep in doctors' mess."</p><p>He just couldn't stop making her smile, couldn't he? "You aren't in your shift."</p><p>"Whatever, Hinata, just come back. I'm picking you up." Without waiting her answer, he hung up.</p><p>She could easily call him back and tell she disagree. Yet, she found herself waiting for him.</p><p>No, she couldn't wait to see him.</p><p>Tenten smiled knowingly. "Speak of the devil?"</p><p>Hinata nodded excitedly, the corners of her eyes creased with too much smiling. She stood and looked around the living room. Her stuff was <em>everywhere </em>and the living room was in a mess. At her sudden frown, Tenten snorted dramatically. "Go pack your stuff, the living room is mine," she said reassuringly.</p><p>"Thank you, Tenten!" Hinata leaned down on her knees to give the girl a hug. "Thank you for everything," she said after she pulled away, both hands rested on Tenten's shoulders. "I can't thank you enough."</p><p>Tenten tapped the hand and nodded sagely. "I know. You can do nothing without me."</p><p>Hinata chuckled. "Yes!" She stood, gave a last glance to Tenten, and disappeared behind the guest room's door, still smiling.</p><p>The bell rang after twenty minutes. She gripped the handle of her bag with both hands and emerged from the guest room. "It's him, isn't it?"</p><p>Sitting on the couch for the first time after the previous twenty minutes, Tenten looked over her shoulder to the door before looking at her. "Good luck."</p><p>She bit her lip as she put down her bag on the counter. "Thanks.." She exhaled before stepping over to reach the door.</p><p>It was indeed Sasuke.</p><p>Ever handsome and gorgeous with just standing there gazing at her <em>tenderly</em>.</p><p>"Hey," he greeted, leaning his weight on the left with right hand hidden inside the pocket of his black jacket. His jacket was unzipped, she could see the heart anatomy t-shirt underneath it.</p><p>She closed the door behind her. "Hey," she responded, face flat. But she was afraid her eyes would give her away.</p><p>"Is it safe to assume that you weren't at our apartment since Monday?"</p><p>Hinata leaned her back on the door. "Neji told you."</p><p>"I figured it out myself first."</p><p>She narrowed her eyes at him.</p><p>Sasuke sighed impatiently. "Let's just go home?"</p><p>"Aren't you curious to know why?"</p><p>"You are free to do what you want," he replied impassively. But then he sighed and ran a hand on his dark locks. "Fine, why?"</p><p>Hinata straightened her body up to full height. Her fingers curled intofists. <em>Okay, Hinata. It's now or never. </em>"Maybe because I subsconsciously wanted to pay you back or to see how would you react if I turned the table and avoiding you instead?" Her eyes locked to his daringly.</p><p>Sasuke's posture straightened. But she wasn't finished. "And guess what? I couldn't even do it properly." Her eyes softened. "I was still keeping tabs on you. I can't just stop not to care."</p><p>Sasuke took a step forward. Despite his face gave nothing, his movement was tentative and eyes gave away everything. It was tenderness on his eyes. If she had any doubt before, she had none now.</p><p>"Or maybe because I didn't think you really like me?" she continued softly. "I was constantly overthinking things because you gave me nothing to hold onto."</p><p>Sasuke took another step and he stood tall just two steps away from her, gazing down at her, encouraging her to continue.</p><p>"Why do you have to make it this hard? Can't you see what I really want?"</p><p>"What do you want, Hinata?" he asked gently, all hands were out, firmly attached to his sides and itching to reach out to her.</p><p>"Sasuke," she began, calling his name tenderly. "I don't want to stay friends." Her eyes lowered to look at his lips for a second before looking up to his eyes with determination. "And might as well do it properly."</p><p>And it was all he needed. In one long stride, he eliminated the space between them. One hand lifted her chin, he smiled before lowering his head toward hers.</p><hr/><p>If before he had felt robbed and hadn't known the cause of it, now he felt completed and knew why.</p><p>So this was what he needed.</p><p>The feeling of her slender torso on his arms, the feeling of her soft lips against his, the pulsating arteries on her neck when his palm tracing her smooth skin to rest on her jawline, and the warmth she radiated toward his body with every touch.</p><p>The feeling of Hinata was the thing he needed.</p><p>She was all he needed.</p><p>They kissed again and again and pulled away briefly to catch their breaths before their lips met again.</p><p>They'd had their first kiss before; it was brief, hesitant, and something new. Now they were everything but. Each kiss lasted longer than the previous ones, the pair getting bolder after every kiss, and every touch evoked more things they didn't know they possessed. Even when both were startled at first when the tongues were involved, none of them were deterred.</p><p>When both finally parted, Sasuke cupped both Hinata's cheeks. Dark eyes clashed to the pale eyes of hers and he knew he could never get enough of her. "This is what <em>we </em>want," he stated, then he raised an eyebrow. "And what's with; you didn't think I really like you?"</p><p>Hinata—face flushed out of happiness—could only grin, still affected by his kisses. And it was all he needed to smile and kiss her again.</p><hr/><p>The night had not come to an end that easy after all. Instead of driving toward their apartment, now the two of them plus another pair of brunettes had settled on the table of four inside the nearby restaurant, ramen was their specialty, but none ordered the signature menus.</p><p>The ones having meal were the males, one female settled on a dessert, while the other one chugging down another cup of <em>sake</em>, and for how much <em>sake</em> she had poured to the cup, the four of them had lost count. The three of them were usually quiet, so no big difference at the moment. Tenten was already going on and on with the incomprehensible mumbles. Hinata watched the girl opposite of her with anxious eyes, her half eaten custard pudding was practically forgotten. Neji gave the girl next to him surreptitious glances while still maintaining to devour his <em>donburi </em>at a steady pace<em>. </em>Sasuke couldn't careless; he was starving.</p><p>The three sober ones wondered, how come the four of them had come to this not so delightful situation? <em>Ah</em>, right.</p><p>As the thought emerged inside her brain, Hinata's eyes widened when she caught Sasuke's eyes. She blushed and brought up her hands to cover the lower half of her face. Sasuke almost choked on his food. And Neji gave them a weary stare. He wanted to roll his eyes as the same thought registered itself on his mind.</p><p>
  <em>If Neji ever proud of himself, aside from his terribly spacious brain, it was of his eyes. That eyes of his were sharp. He caught things easily even before his mind registered the importance of the sight before him. It was also how he caught the thing going on between his cousin and her so called flat mate and best friend. Couldn't they see just how sickening it was to see the look on their eyes when they were looking at each other? Ugh, he wanted to vomit but he was so damn hungry he had nothing to retrograde from his stomach to his mouth.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hinata hadn't texted him saying she had left his apartment or would be leaving any time soon, Tenten had texted him she was with Hinata already. And that brat of an Uchiha, that conceited brat hadn't replied back to his text. He did answer him kind of late, but whatever, he was done helping him.</em>
</p><p><em>He realized he had been acting all grouchy since earlier on the evening, one of his group mates had smoothly </em>offered <em>to continue his share of the task they had. </em>You just wanted to get rid of me, heh. <em>He mused darkly. His foul mood had everything to do with the upcoming medical board exam. He had been studying and everything for that damn exam. </em>The result better be good, che.</p><p>
  <em>Though, he must admitted, he never would have thought all the issues of his at the moment would be settled at one particular moment he was about to encounter.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was still at the far end of the hallway when he saw the scene far ahead from him. But even someone without his eyes would catch the sight of a tall dark haired man and a much shorter woman with shoulder length indigo hair were involved in a series of lip-locking. A very heated ones at that, and right in front of his apartment.</em>
</p><p><em>One might be infuriated knowing some random couples had decided to do the intimacy right in front of their place. But they didn't get his eyes. And his eyes were quick to recognize the two young adults were the very much people that had occupied his thought. And certainly it wasn't fury that showed in his eyes instantly, it was amusement, humor, and –of course—</em>relief.</p><p>
  <em>His pride of his eyes was undoubtedly evidenced. His wonderings about his texts to all the people he cared about all were answered. And his mood had improved almost instantly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>One thing though, he was still hungry.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The pair hadn't even heard his steps even when he had already been on the spot just five feet away from them. He had padded down the hall quietly though, so no surprise. Because he terribly wanted to clear his throat at them. Since forever.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Uhm," he cleared his throat noisily. It was oddly satisfying and one corner of his lips twitched.</em></p><p>
  <em>The sequence of events that followed had him mentally rolled on the floor.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hinata pulled away immediately while Sasuke's upper limbs embraced the air Hinata's delightful form was supposed to be before.</em>
</p><p>"<em>N-Neji!" Hinata gasped, gawking at her cousin behind the arm of the Uchiha who sighed frustratedly. Sasuke looked over his shoulder to regard the approaching Hyuuga.</em></p><p>
  <em>Neji shook his head, openly amused."Everything worked out all right apparently." He continued to saunter toward them, eyeing the two with open humor. "What's up with that faces?" Smirking, he regarded the flustered face of Hinata and the scowling face of Sasuke. "Clearly you should've realized having some intimacy at.." Neji looked around the hallway in mock observation."...the hallway right in front of my place, of all places, have high possibility to run into someone, particularly me."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No verbal retort from them, he didn't expect one either. He continued to walk past them to open the door of his apartment. But then he paused, a hand grasping the handle. "Have you two had dinner?" he asked. His tone neutral as if not a second before he had just teased the other two raw.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Neji was somewhat startled when an instant reply was heard from the Uchiha.</em>
</p><p>"<em>No," Sasuke said reluctantly.</em></p><p>
  <em>Hinata gasped at his reply and looked at Sasuke in disbelief.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Sasuke shifted from one foot to the other, feeling scrutinized by pale gray eyes, not just one pair, but two pairs. And as much as he wanted to go straight to his and Hinata's apartment, and if before he had felt overwhelmed because of the kisses and all the feelings that had battered him at once that had made him completely forgot he hadn't eaten yet, now the hunger struck him full-force.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Neji regarded Sasuke with amusement. "Good, me too. Let's dine out." Neji looked at Hinata. "Tenten's still here?" he asked, his tone was still neutral.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Y-yes."</em></p><p>
  <em>Neji nodded idly before opening his door, stepping deeper inside and left it ajar.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Still blushing, Hinata tugged Sasuke by the end of his sleeve. His eyes diverted from the door down to hers then. That was when Hinata's hand reaching down to lace their fingers together. Her hand was so much smaller that his, and it felt right, it fitted perfectly within the grasp of his much larger hand.</em>
</p><p>"<em>I still have my stuff there," she informed, smiling demurely, "let's just wait inside?"</em></p><p>
  <em>Sasuke let loose both corners of his lips to rise before nodding.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Inside, Tenten was already standing, looking sober and expectant to the approaching duo. And when her warm brown eyes caught the interlacing fingers, she smirked knowingly to Hinata and regarded Sasuke with a lift of the chin.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It didn't take long then. Neji emerged from his room just when Sasuke had taken a firm hold onto Hinata's bag.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Neji eyed everyone as he walked steadily toward the door with no stops. "Let's go," he said.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The four of them settled inside of Sasuke's Corolla Altis as their destination wasn't that far from Neji's building and he and Tenten could easily walk back to their own places. Tenten's building was only three blocks away from Neji's.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>After the four of them had been seated inside the restaurant, Neji immediately waved a hand for a waiter to come to them. A male their age walked over to their table.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Neji, let's have </em>sake<em>," Tenten suggested just when the waiter arrived at their table.</em></p><p>
  <em>Neji eyed Tenten out the corner of his eyes, as if contemplating. "I can't tonight," he replied at last.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Hey," greeted the ginger head waiter, "ready to order?"</em></p><p><em>Tenten rolled her eyes at Neji before looking at the waiter warmly. "A bottle of </em>sake<em>."</em></p><p>
  <em>The waiter nodded as he penned down the first order.</em>
</p><p>"<em>Suit yourself," Neji muttered under his breath.</em></p><p>
  <em>The waiter eyed the other three alternately. "Anything else?"</em>
</p><p>Certainly, Neji was too focused devouring his meal he didn't touch the <em>sake </em>despite he initially had considered to. That only resulting Tenten to have the whole <em>sake </em>for herself, hence the very situation they were in now.</p><p>It took them by surprise when Tenten finished her mumblings and broke the relative silence with perfectly uttered words, seeing that the other three had been focusing on finishing their orders. The truth was, the males had been dedicated to fill their stomach indeed, but Hinata was primarily resting her head on her palm as she gazed at Sasuke openly. And Sasuke couldn't help but to sneak glances toward his girlfriend and occasionally smirked while chewing.</p><p>Ah, girlfriend. It sounded satisfying inside of his head.</p><p>"You always reject me," mumbled Tenten out of nowhere. Her tone was flat, and the words were slurred, but the others heard her perfectly.</p><p>Hinata immediately darted her eyes to her, cocking her head in the process. Sasuke glanced at her curiously. Neji looked at her funny and decided to ignore her. Because none of them didn't know the "you" she referred to.</p><p>"You are always busy," she continued.</p><p>Neji ate faster, his mouth full before swallowing quickly.</p><p>"I'm always with Lee that got me wonder for a moment who is my really boyfriend?!"</p><p>Neji brought up his bowl close to his mouth, swallowing everything clean.</p><p>Tenten hiccuped. "Oops, I mean, who was my boyfriend." She reached for the bottle to pour another cup of <em>sake</em>. Neji reached out the bottle first, putting it out of her reach.</p><p>Tenten didn't seem to realize her bottle of <em>sake </em>had disappeared. Instead she laced her fingers to hold her heavy head in place. "And yea, of course I said to myself; this can't do. Can't really do."</p><p>For a moment Neji thought she had sobered up when she looked at him. "And…. Guess what? You took it calmly. Too calmly I wanted to smack that composure off your face. Made me wonder all those years we'd been together as a couple meant nothing to you really. But that's fine. I mean we are <em>best friends</em>. So yeah. And we got Lee."</p><p>Okay, that was enough for tonight. Neji stood up and pulled out some cash. "I'm taking her home with me." He beckoned the money on the table. "Text me if this isn't enough."</p><p>"Neji," Hinata started hesitantly, glancing at Sasuke. "will you be fine on your own?"</p><p>"We can drop you off first," Sasuke added flatly.</p><p>"Nah, it's the opposite way, it's okay. I'm accustomed to this." He chuckled.</p><p>Hinata frowned; she wasn't completely convinced.</p><p>Neji settled Tenten's arm over his shoulder gently. "It's fine, Hinata. Good night."</p><p>"O-okay, then. Good night and be safe, Neji."</p><p>Neji grunted an answer and walked off.</p><p>Hinata glanced at Sasuke again and Sasuke glanced back at her before both staring off at the receding brown-haired pair.</p><hr/><p>When they finally arrived at their apartment, the two didn't quite want to go inside of their own room so soon. But it was almost midnight, they both knew they needed to rest before tomorrow's schedule.</p><p>Hinata did walk toward her room, but her steps were dragged as if waiting for something. Sasuke didn't do much in order to reach his own room but he didn't do much to hold her back either.</p><p><em>But,</em> <em>fuck it.</em></p><p>Sasuke grasped her forearm gently. Hinata gasped and flinched slightly before turning around to face him. He felt her arm relaxed on his grasp.</p><p>"Can I…" he began, somehow feeling shy. "Can I kiss you again?"</p><p>It took her by surprise and it showed on her face before she smiled openly. She stood on her toes and gave him a peck on the lips. "Like you need to ask," she murmured, gazing up at him.</p><p>Those were his words from two weeks ago that felt like months ago. In the span of two weeks they relationship had grown so much compared to how they friendship had been. It took years to have come into the state they were in previously; a pair of comfortable best friends. And it took only two weeks for them to be romantically involved as a couple. Well, not two weeks, it certainly took months itself for him to come terms to his own feeling. It made him wonder how was the case to Hinata.</p><p>But he got to say, the last two weeks had been the most essential time for them into reaching the state they were in now.</p><p>A couple.</p><p>Sasuke couldn't help it. He grinned like a high school student who had just entered puberty. And of course, he rewarded her with a full kiss, completing their journey of the night.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter 17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>ac·knowl·edg·ment</p><p>acceptance of the truth or existence of something</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>Transitioning their relationship into the proper setting in the wake of their confessed affection towards each other wasn't difficult. In fact, it was quite easy. Now that they had overcome the wall they had made themselves, it was quite easy navigating in the open fields of … their unbound feelings.</p><p>If before they had always been looking forward to finish the day off and clamber to bed at night, now they found themselves looking forward to see each other in the next morning. The days spent in the lecture hall or tutorial room became so much brighter, and the hours spent in hospital were even exhilarating; if the two got the chance to spend their night shifts together. But even in a shift without the presence of another, just thinking about the one already settled for the day at their apartment was enough to have a smile plastered on their faces.</p><p>And just as expected, Sasuke was a reserved person, quiet, and not one to display affection in the public. Hinata found it to be pleasant, as she was the same. But everytime they locked eyes, she couldn't help to feel self-conscious that their little reserved interaction would betray them into the public eye. He gazed at her so openly, adoringly, and tenderly she felt herself blush everytime it happened. It wasn't in herself to tear her gaze away, in fact, she couldn't get enough gazing at his eyes. Looking at her own reflection in the depth of his dark eyes was the thing she loved most. It felt amazing. It felt amazing to have someone to look at you solely, as if you were the only one that mattered.</p><p>But if he didn't have it in him to stop looking at her, she should have been the one in charge.</p><p>She diverted her eyes to their shoes, sauntering on the tiled floor of the hospital ground floor. "Stop it," she said softly, all the while stifling a grin.</p><p>She heard him chuckle. "What?"</p><p>"Stop <em>gazing</em> at me like that."</p><p>"I thought you loved it."</p><p>Hinata looked up to him, feeling her cheeks hot but she couldn't care less. "What made you think that?"</p><p>Sasuke looked down at her with an eyebrow slightly lifted. The unuttered "really?" hung heavily between them.</p><p>Hinata shook her head, the hair that had reached the middle of her scapula swayed as she did so. A smile crept its way on her tired, yet pretty face. "Just stop doing it so openly."</p><p>"I can't help it."</p><p>Hinata immediately brought her hands to cover the lower half of her face. "Argh, Sasuke," she whined, her voice was mumbled behind the cover of her hands. "I'm going home now."</p><p>On that, Sasuke let out a laugh and grasped her wrist to keep her from stepping away. "No, you promised me to wait until my shift starts."</p><p>"It isn't even <em>your </em>shift!" Hinata glanced at him before eyeing her seized wrist. "Who is this person you're doing a favour anyway?"</p><p>"She was desperate, okay? And she'll take my shift on this weekend. So, free weekend for us."</p><p>"It's a <em>she</em>? <em>Who</em>?"</p><p>Sasuke brought a hand to apply a pressure on the forehead. She even ignored the fact his weekend was free, did she? "Don't you feel proud? Me, doing a favour to someone."</p><p>The two had arrived at the in-hospital café and put their conversation on hold when both ordered their usual drinks. Hinata's eyes caught the pouring rain from the large window that showed the front side of the hospital. "Ah, I didn't realize it was raining." And as if continuing her talk about the wheather, she asked tonelessly, "Who is she?" And leaned her upper body on the pick-up counter.</p><p>"You did it again."</p><p>Hinata glared at the smirking Sasuke. "What?"</p><p>"Evading my question."</p><p>Hinata scoffed before smiling at the barista who brought their drinks to them. After thanking the barista and pulling out two straws, she led Sasuke to sit on the table by the window. "Look who's talking."</p><p>Sasuke sat opposite her and removed the paper wrapping of the straw. "And even casting retorts from that little mouth," he said, thrusting down the straw through the plastic cap hole. "I proudly declare that I rubbed off on you."</p><p>"Sasuke, I'm going home for sure."</p><p>"And you're not stopping there. With that little threats that I seem to hear quite frequently lately."</p><p>Hinata took a long sip before scowling in mock anger and looking at him imploringly. "Just tell me who she is."</p><p>He took the time to sip on his drink, watching the flushed Hyuuga before him in mock contemplation. And the very Hyuuga was his girlfriend. Now that weeks had passed familiarizing the terms of boyfriend and girlfriend to regard each other, it felt years ago when the thought was only a foreign idea in his head. Why didn't they do it sooner really? It felt way easier, more pleasant, exciting, and all being a couple.</p><p>And a flushed Hinata was a sight to look forward for. Day or night. No matter if it was due to embarrassment, exertion, enthusiasm, or even anger, all were equal. And an angered Hinata was a rare sight he wished to have it carved inside his brain. She was a beautiful creature full of expression that he wished to engrave each one to his head.</p><p>Her flushed face after their making out session was his favorite. And kissing her was the thing he had trouble restraining. And even with the table between them, he would gladly bend over the length of the table to reward that tempting lips a kiss or two.</p><p>Just…not in this crowded coffee shop.</p><p>"We'll see how you behave."</p><p>Hinata snorted. Did he mention that he <em>adored </em>her when doing exactly that?</p><p>Hinata pressed both cheeks with her palms, elbows were propped at the table. Why did she put up with this? Because… ah, <em>right</em>. "I really like you," she said imploringly, fully aware of the expected warmth to appear on both cheeks, "you know that, right?" She chewed on her bottom lip, eyes narrowing in anticipation of his reaction.</p><p>If he was taken aback, he didn't show it. His eyes widened marginally before he caught himself and grinned. She was just something, wasn't she? "Nice try, Hyuuga." He crossed his arms over his chest. "And…yes, I know."</p><p>There was a rather pregnant silence fell over them as both took the time to sip on their drinks. "I…," she tried again, and floundering, eyes looking at anything but him. Her brows were taut as she was reaching for the words.</p><p>Sasuke shook his head, amused. "Stop confessing already, we've passed that—"</p><p>"I've liked you since high school!"</p><p>"—phase."</p><p>It took both of them off guard.</p><p>Sasuke stared blankly at the gaping mess that was his girlfriend. Hinata quickly brought up her hands to cover her whole face and hide the suffusing scarlet over her face and neck. Her attempt to conceal herself didn't do much to her ears though.</p><p>Sasuke took the time to close his lips he didn't register to be slightly parted before. He didn't hear wrong, did he? But it was to be expected for him to recover first. "You…<em>What</em>?"</p><p>Hinata didn't budge.</p><p>"What?" he repeated in a gentler manner, straightening his posture while his hands finding their way towards hers. Sensing the feel of his fingertips on her hands, she let him guide the offending hands lowered slowly."Didn't you like Naruto?" he asked curiously.</p><p>Hinata eyed his hands leaving hers before looking up at his eyes shyly. "I-I did," she admitted through a low voice, "I-I don't know. Maybe it had started with me l-liking both of you."</p><p>"Whoa."</p><p>Hinata bit her lip. "I-I mean I liked Naruto first then I-I think I…" She trailed off when he looked at her closely with open hilarity. "W-what?"</p><p>Sasuke lifted an eyebrow. "What?"</p><p>Hinata frowned. "Why are you looking at me like that?"</p><p>"Why are <em>you</em> looking at me like that?"</p><p>Hinata threw him a look of incredulity. "I know what you're thinking about."</p><p>Sasuke scoffed half-heartedly. "What am I thinking about?"</p><p>Her mouth puckered into a half pout. "You're j-judging me right now." She cringed at her own words. It didn't sound silly when they were still inside of her head.</p><p>Sasuke felt the instant urge to smirk, and he did. "Who's judging you?" If anything, it elated him terribly. The discovery put his mood high above the clouds he disregarded the fact that his shift was approaching. And a pouting Hinata was too cute. It took all his might not to kiss her right then and there. "So I had the upper hand just because we go to the same med school?"</p><p>She just stared at him, her frown deepened in irritation.</p><p>"And living together?" he ventured further.</p><p>Hinata huffed and crossed her arms. "You're unbelievable." Why did he continue on with the teasings? Didn't he hear enough? And how did his teasings still get through her? How could she still feel embarrassed by his teasings?</p><p>Sasuke uncharacteristically grinned at her ear to ear. Not that he cared from doing the unusuals in her presence. She was the only person who had the privilege to bring out the most in him. And to think that he was at the state he was in now all due to the fact that he was at an advantage? Well, he couldn't care less. The fact that she liked him even far longer than he would have anticipated sufficed.</p><p>"I should've realized it sooner," he stated absently, eyes locked to her lips unseeingly.</p><p>Noticing the look he gave to her lips, Hinata reflexively pursed them into a thin line, hiding the colored pink area from the scrutiny of the dark eyes she adored. "What is?"</p><p>Sasuke diverted his eyes to look at hers for what felt like a lifetime, before responded with a nonchalant "Nothing."</p><p>When it was time for him to head off toward the ER, he walked Hinata toward the polyclinic side entrance of the hospital as it was the entrance closest to the walkway straight to the downtown. It was also fortunate that it was the most sparse area late in the afternoon after the end hours of outpatient services (as sparse as a hospital could get, that is).</p><p>Hinata gave a small smile encouragingly, urging him to have some zeal just enough to endure through the night. Sasuke shrugged indifferently and beckoned her with his chin. "Your coat."</p><p>Hinata looked down her torso reflexively. "Ah, right," she responded, looking up at him appreciatively. She lowered her tote bag to the elbow. "Please?"</p><p>Instantly Sasuke pulled her leather bag off of her arm and waited as she removed her white coat. He then extracted her lavender folding umbrella before pulling the straps far apart so the opening of her bag gaped widely. Hinata smiled at him gratefully as she folded the garment and tucked it neatly inside her bag before accepting the umbrella.</p><p>"Okay, I'm going home now," said Hinata, shifting her bag and the umbrella to comfortable positions.</p><p>Sasuke nodded faintly before grasping her forearm gently. Hinata glanced back at him over her shoulder, giving him a questioning look.</p><p>"It's Ino, by the way," he disclosed at last.</p><p>The tender pale eyes shifted into firm ones, narrowing as the seconds passed by. "Yeah?" Hinata pulled his hand gently and started off toward the exit, muttering "whatever" loud enough just so he could hear clearly.</p><p>Sasuke watched her back as she made a stop just after the automatic door to open the umbrella. The pouring rain had loosened into a relaxed pitter patter and Hinata made her way through the rain in a pleasant saunter. He stared long until her figure was no more than another random pedestrians making their way toward the downtown. He also noticed the fact that her hair had grown long enough to reach the middle of her scapula. A smile crept its way across his face, recalling her jealousy prompted reaction earlier and even earlier discovery he had just found out.</p><p>"<em>I should've realized it sooner."</em></p><p>"<em>What is?"</em></p><p>
  <em>That I might have liked you even earlier.</em>
</p><hr/><p>Hinata turned her head over to the glass sliding door, watching torrents of rain hitting the barrier from the heavy wheather. It had come to the days of the season where it rained a lot. She liked rain. Just… it wasn't on the favour with today's plans.</p><p>She felt the couch shift with someone's weight. She turned her head to someone sitting beside her, pouting. "It's still raining heavily."</p><p>Sasuke wasn't really paying attention; his eyes were focused on her hair. An almost smile crept its way across his face. "It's fine if you want us to go now," he said distractedly as a hand finding its way to touch the edges of her hair.</p><p>Hinata absently touched the opposite side of her hair. "Should I… should I keep my hair to grow?"</p><p>His hand shifted to stroke the crown of her head with his fingers, dark eyes diverted to her pale ones. "It's up to you."</p><p>Hinata leaned to his touch. "What do you prefer?"</p><p>The answer didn't take long, but it wasn't an immediate answer either. "I prefer what you prefer."</p><p>Hinata pouted and slumped in disappointment. "Sasuke."</p><p>Sasuke retracted his hand and smiled teasingly. "Hinata." The way he called her name was playful, though his eyes gave something else. And she smiled to that. Still smiling, Sasuke leaned his back to the couch, head cocking to look at her comfortably. "Go now? Or wait?"</p><p>Hinata too leaned her back to the couch with a huff. "Let's just wait for another thirty minutes?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded before saying tonelessly, "It's weird."</p><p>Dark brows furrowed to his out-of-nowhere utterance. "What is?"</p><p>"Last summer you were going home with Neji." Sasuke turned his head to stare at the wall ahead of him. "Now you're with me," he continued, and the next words were uttered in a murmur, "as my girlfriend."</p><p>Her eyes widened spontaneously with the red hue suffising to her cheeks. Hinata brought her arms to squeeze his arm and snuggled her face on his deltoid, hiding her face. "Sasuke!" came a mumbled cry.</p><p>Sasuke snickered. "I'm disgusting." He gave a light raise of his shoulder. "What did you do to me?" he asked to her hair.</p><p>Hinata lifted her head slightly, peering at him from the veil of her long lashes. "I don't know," she murmured, implicating her acknowledgement to his change of behavior.</p><p>Sasuke laughed some more, watching as Hinata blushed some more. He cupped her left cheek with his free hand and captured her lips with his own.</p><p>"So, what do you prefer?" Hinata murmured after their lips parted.</p><p>"You are Hinata either with long or short hair," uttered Sasuke, and when he noticed the first twitch of her mouth to form a pout, he continued, "but if it bothers you that much then let's grow your hair for the moment."</p><p>"Hm.. okay."</p><p>"Okay," he reiterated with a chuckle. Sasuke shifted to look over the lump of her body to the window. "It has stopped raining heavily," he informed, "let's go?"</p><p>Hinata smiled delightedly and before she could respond her mouth was captured again by his.</p><p>He couldn't help it.</p><p>Not that she complained anyway.</p><hr/><p>Hinata was brushing her hair when her phone rang. Giddily she removed her hold on the brush and stepping quickly to her phone on her desk. Exhaling to calm herself down, she answered the call. She waited until she heard his voice greet her.</p><p>"Hey."</p><p>The reaction was instant. She grinned like it was the very thing she had been waiting to do since their arrival at their hometown late in the afternoon. "Hey… is everyone home?"</p><p>"Yes," his reply came softly, "Itachi-niisan's just arrived ten minutes ago. Your father's home?"</p><p>"Yes, he is," she replied, padding toward her bed. "Are you ready to sleep?"</p><p>Sasuke sighed. "Yeah, I guess."</p><p>Hinata sat on the edge of the bed. "Good, you need to rest. It was a long ride."</p><p>"You rest too," he mumbled, the weariness was thick in his voice.</p><p>"I will. See you tomorrow?"</p><p>"Hmm."</p><p>Hinata smiled. "Sasuke?"</p><p>Silence was his only reply. Hinata waited for awhile before she called his name again.</p><p>"Sasuke?"</p><p>"Hmhhm?"</p><p>"Good night," she whispered.</p><p>"Hmmhnight."</p><p>Hinata pulled the phone from her ear to look at the screen, smiling warmly. She admired the picture of Sasuke in a white coat she had chosen for his contact info. He was sitting on one of the benches in the hospital hallway, crossing his arms waiting for her to return after collecting the group's homework to a resident. He was watching some people interacting within the vicinity, a nurse and a surgeon to be exact. He was watching them curiously, she didn't even know if he could listen to their conversation at all. Yet, whatever the two were having to discuss, it piqued his interest greatly.</p><p>It was only natural for her to capture the moment.</p><p>And when he just smirked at her antics the second he found out being captured by her phone camera, she had just smirked back.</p><hr/><p>The weather forecast for the next morning hadn't mentioned of any rain at all. And true to its prediction, that day wasn't raining. They had stretched on their usual corner just down the street, breathing in fresh air of summer in the early morning. He never once bringing earpods with him, there was no need. On their usual runs, they always ran with Hinata in charge of controlling the pace. Her pace was steady, and it was never a relaxed run at all. That one fact was easy to make him openly admit that it was worth the admiration. How could it not? With that soft-edged petite form she had, one would not simply predict her to be fit enough running steadily for thirty minutes, moreover with the pace she had been accustomed to.</p><p>On one of the days she'd like to be challenged, she would quicken her pace to run a couple of steps ahead of him until he took charge in steadying the hastened pace and she would easily catch up. Now running beside her as he inhaled and exhaled in short intakes of breath, he couldn't stop from thinking that Hinata, his girlfriend, was indeed a tough one<em>.</em> He smirked at the thought before scoffing. <em>He </em>was unbelievable.</p><p>The dark haired pair finished their run coming from the direction closest to her house. Sasuke waited on her porch, sitting on the last level of the stairs with both elbows propped on his knees as Hinata went inside to fetch some drinks.</p><p>A bottle of isotonic appeared out of the corner of his eyes. He turned his head lightly and took the offered bottle gratefully. When finding out it was chilled, he couldn't thank her enough. "Thanks," he said, screwing off the cap.</p><p>Hinata was drinking from her own bottle when she responded with a nod, lowering her haunches to sit next him. "Want to go inside?" she asked, screwing back the cap.</p><p>"Here's fine."</p><p>Hinata nodded absently and went silent beside him. Sasuke looked at her curiously as she bit her bottom lip clearly nervous to talk about something. "What is it?" he asked, sounding amused and expectant.</p><p>Hinata looked up to him before returning her gaze to the bottle between her hands. Her face was flushed from their previous exercise, but the red color over her face could get even darker apparently. She looked up to him shyly again. "Do you have plans with your family for the summer?" she asked slowly.</p><p>It wasn't what he expected. Not that he expected something or anything at all. "Not that I knew of… so far."</p><p>Hinata nodded absently. "I've been thinking about it a lot," she admitted softly, "w-what should I have as a p-present for you."</p><p>Sasuke continued to watch her curiously, a query had touched the tip of his tongue but he remained quiet.</p><p>"Your birthday is next week." She paused for a moment before continuing more tentatively. "Let's… let's go on a trip…?"</p><p>Sasuke stared blankly at her. "You've been thinking about it a lot," he blurted flatly.</p><p>The previously receded blush reappeared instantly. "I….i-if you don't want to t-that's okay—"</p><p>"Why are you assuming I don't want to?" He quickly interjected, his tone incredulous.</p><p>She stared at him owlishly, uncertain on how to respond. "S-so, do you w-want to?"</p><p>The word "absolutely" was already on the tip of his tongue. But he knew better in order to utter that particular word out he would need to grin. So he opted to say something longer to restrain the urge to smile. "What kind of trip do you have in mind?"</p><p>And he didn't regret one bit for she instantly beamed and blurted out all her plans she had been mulling over for who knows how long.</p><hr/><p>Stumbling upon things to do in the spring had been proven to be something useful, despite the ideas had been produced by an activity to distract herself from doing other thing nigh frivolous and it had needed the season to change to make it to use. Ever since Sasuke had stood, waiting patiently for her to explain herself, in front of her cousin's apartment, she could think of nothing but him. Though exaggerating, because in fact she still had been thinking about her patients, studies, exams, et cetera in order for her to survive the semester, it was not entirely untrue. Every single thing about him became her number one priority to ponder about and she found herself in need to think thoroughly anything associated with him before she could think about other things.</p><p>The time she first opened her eyes in the morning, she would wonder if he had opened his eyes just two walls from her. The moment she heard his door being opened while she was preparing breakfast, it was only natural for her to reflexively turn around and face him with a smile if only for a couple of seconds. When it was time for her to go home when he still had night shift to go by, she would wait with him in the hospital or nearby areas until his time to enter the ER (and he would do the same if it were her to have the night shift, much to her delight). From thinking about minor things in daily basis, it grew into something more major. His upcoming birthday held the highest level. And it had just reached the middle of the spring when her pondering started.</p><p>She could only come up with negative words to describe her behaviours lately. <em>Crazy</em>. <em>Foolish. Bizarre. Creepy.</em></p><p>Yet she didn't mind.</p><p>There was also another word that sufficed to overwhelm the others. <em>Happy.</em></p><p>She was happy and that fact was what mattered.</p><p>So going on an overnight trip on his birthday was the final thing she had come up as his birthday present. She had been curious to try hiking and camping in the natures, though not in the spring as what the article she had read advised, what could go wrong to try in the summer? It might be even better.</p><p>So it was killing not two but three birds with one stone; her curiosity would be fulfilled, she got the perfect gift for Sasuke, and Sasuke would also be happy with his present, at least that was what she hoped.</p><p>If he agreed (and he did), it would be a first for her. It wasn't the case with Sasuke though. Going on a trekking trip up on some mountains was a thing for him and his older brother. It was practically an annual thing for them in the summer if both's schedules allowed. One of them starting the elder brother's black Jeep just after sunrise or unloading all their trekking-oriented stuff after their trips were also the usual sight for her to witness. And before she was never once curious about their trips. It wasn't really her thing, at least that was what she initially thought.</p><p>But ever since her little sister had joined scouts last year, Hanabi had been talking endlessly about her journeys in the wild (not that wild, but they were indeed activities in the woods). It was such a shock last summer tiptoeing toward the youngest Hyuuga's room after she had just arrived only to find foreign items inside that weren't supposed to be there before that made her forget her initial purpose to secretively bring herself to Hanabi's room; a bright yellow 35L backpack of renowned outdoor brand (she didn't even know the brand existed until Hanabi had talked about outdoor brands she had gotten familiar with), a pair of trekking shoes (that was waterproof based on one of Hanabi's rants about footwears), an outdoor cooking set (at the time it was concealed with its drawstring pouch, so she didn't know it was a cooking set), a microfiber towel (though she had to admit this particular item was very useful in more ways than one and she just had to own the lilac colored one the moment she knew of its existence), and many other things her little sister hadn't touched in recent session of her rants.</p><p>Her last memory of outdoor activities was the mandatory camping trip back in middle school and she didn't remember much. It didn't leave any significant impression on her. But listening to her little sister passionately talking about her outdoor experiences, with her recent finding about hiking, she couldn't help but to feel eventually intrigued. What did the Uchiha brothers find in those trips to bind them every year to come back? Was it really that <em>exciting </em>as what her little sister had talked endlessly? Would she find the thing that made the Uchiha brothers come back to it at least once a year? Would she find it to be as exciting as her sister did?</p><p>Well, only one way to find out; she had to try it firsthand.</p><p>And it had come to this moment. After their morning run, the two agreed to go to the square to find the things she needed. She had found almost everything within the walls of her house, thanks to Hanabi, but she still needed two important things. One being a pair of trekking shoes seeing that she and Hanabi didn't share the same size, and the other item was a waterproof outdoor jacket of her own. She could borrow Hanabi's absolutely, but she did want to have a jacket of her own. Who knows if this trip would start something new? Either waking the thrill inside her to repeat the activity, or even better, she and Sasuke would find it worth the trouble to be an annual thing for them. She felt giddy with excitement just thinking about it.</p><p>Her eyes caught the approval nod of Sasuke behind her from their reflections in the mirrored pillar. Currently she was trying the jacket she had fallen in love with the moment she stepped inside the outdoor gear store. The very brand Hanabi had been talking about, and to her surprise (or not at all), it was also Sasuke and Itachi's preference.</p><p>Her eyes fell over his on the mirror before she smiled and nodded excitedly. The jacket was lavender colored with indigo strips from the shoulders down the sleeves, had multiple pockets (very convenient), and was also warm. She could easily see herself wearing it in the earliest of the spring or latest of the autumn.</p><p>"Sasuke?" a familiar voice called from behind the pillar. "Hinata?"</p><p>Hinata angled her head to the side, eyes widening to the sight of said person approaching them. It was Naruto, and he wasn't alone; there were three other boys flanked him on the sides.</p><p>"Hey? You two have gone back here?"</p><p>She should've regarded him back, she knew. But another thing caught her attention; that was the brown haired guy on his left. "Kiba-kun!"</p><p>Kiba squinted his eyes and tilted his head as if to value her, and she felt warmth creep slowly over her cheeks. "Hinata?" he said hesitantly and she nodded excitedly, smiling. Kiba grinned and eliminated the space between them in three quick strides. "Hinata!"</p><p>Hinata giggled. "Kiba-kun!"</p><p>"God, it's really you. How you've been doing?"</p><p>"I've been really great! How about you?"</p><p>Kiba shrugged offhandedly, but the grin still present. "Just the same, I guess." He cocked his head to his right. "So, you know Naruto?"</p><p>"Hey! That's supposed to be my question here!" Naruto had caught up to them and the other two had lagged behind. With Sasuke just behind her, looking disinterested but inwardly curious with the exchange, the six of them had formed a misshapen circle.</p><p>"Ah, what a surprise to meet you two here at the same time!" Hinata covered her mouth with her fingers as she giggled. She looked at Naruto, eyes twinkling with excitement. "Naruto, Kiba and I were classmates back in the primary school, we hang out a lot." She turned to Kiba. "Kiba, Naruto and I first met in high school, and we're best friend ever since!"</p><p>Naruto rubbed his nose with his thumb smugly. "Yeah and that brooding guy over there," he uttered, cocking his head toward Sasuke.</p><p>Hinata lightly turned his head to look at Sasuke over her shoulder, smiling awkwardly. Sasuke caught her eyes before looking away and nodded curtly with a grunt. He didn't correct Naruto, nor did she. They'd need to disclose the news soon…</p><p>"This is great, why don't we have dinner together?" Naruto suggested excitedly, eyeing them expectantly before looking at the other two sheepishly. "Ah, and I forgot to introduce you guys," he admitted, rubbing his nape. "Sasuke, Hinata, meet my roommates, Chouji," he said, bumping his elbow to the full belly of the more stout guy. "And Shikamaru, the <em>'genius'</em>." The so called genius with dark brown hair in a high ponytail rolled his eyes. He waved to his roommate's best friends lazily, his brown eyes caught the recognition look in their contrasted pair of eyes and a faint gasp escaped from the girl's mouth, but he paid them no mind.</p><p>Hinata covered her mouth with a hand. "So, you're the <em>Shikamaru</em>!"</p><p>Shikamaru immediately caught the implication behind her words, he nodded and rubbed his nape awkwardly. "Yeah."</p><p>Naruto squinted and turned his head to them to and fro. "The <em>Shikamaru?</em> Wait, have I mentioned my new roommates' name?<em>" </em>he asked suspiciously.</p><p>Hinata looked at Naruto, giggling. "No, you hadn't told us explicitly your new roommate's name. But, you did mention his name on one of our video calls… it was last year, I guess?"</p><p>Naruto didn't seem to remember and paid it no more mind. He shrugged before looking at them each on the eyes expectantly. "So, what about dinner?"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>tens·ion</p><p>a strained state or condition resulting from forces acting in opposition to each other</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>It was perfect.</p><p>The two of them strolling around the square from one store to the other looking for the gears she needed for the trip they had planned. The pair of shoes she had bought was of the best brand one could ever wish for. The lavender colored jacket she had chosen was perfect for her, and the fact that it was the woman version of his black one, it fitted <em>them </em>perfectly.</p><p>Next thing he knew, it wasn't any more.</p><p>"Sasuke? Hinata?" It was Naruto. It had to be him of all people.</p><p>And he wasn't alone, he had some kind of a gang consisted of three other people following him. It wasn't that Sasuke loathed to meet his best friend, he had to admit he had missed him and wanted to meet him, though with Hinata occupying his mind he hadn't dwelt on the matter much lately. It was only a matter of 'just not at the right time'. He just wanted Hinata for himself at the moment. Was that too much to ask?</p><p>"Hey? You two have gone back here?" the blonde continued with the boisterous inquiries. Who was he? Their mother? His wondering stopped the moment he locked eyes with Naruto's blue eyes. There was something <em>harsh </em>about his eyes. Sasuke couldn't finger exactly what, but it didn't look too amiable. He raised an eyebrow at him, but Naruto diverted his eyes to look at Hinata. That was when his eyes <em>changed</em>. Sasuke felt his heartbeat quickened for the thing he wasn't quite sure.</p><p>"Kiba-kun!"</p><p>Sasuke snapped his head toward his girlfriend. <em>What now? </em>She did know the guy?</p><p>The so called <em>Kiba-kun </em>squinted his eyes before recognition flashed over his narrow black eyes. "Hinata?" Sasuke eyed the girl before him nodding rather too excitedly. The brown haired guy grinned and strode toward them and went too close to Hinata for his liking. "Hinata!"</p><p>Sasuke held his breath, anticipating a hug or something. What he feared didn't come and he sighed inconspicuously. He heard Hinata giggle. "Kiba-kun!"</p><p>"God, it's really you. How you've been doing?"</p><p>Sasuke tried not to glare at the brown haired guy. He really did try, but it come to the expense of not focusing on their conversation. <em>Yeah, have it your way. Converse all you want and forget your surrounding.</em></p><p>"I've been really great! How about you?"</p><p>"Just the same, I guess." Kiba cocked his head to his right. "So, you know Naruto?"</p><p>"Hey! That's supposed to be my question here!"</p><p>Sasuke eyed Naruto closely. The look he had toward him before wasn't present, but he wasn't looking at him at the moment so he couldn't really tell.</p><p>"Ah, what a surprise to meet you two here at the same time!" exclaimed Hinata excitedly, covering her mouth with a hand as she giggled. She turned her head to Naruto, her fingers lowered to her chin demurely. "Naruto, Kiba and I were classmates back in the primary school, we hang out a lot." Sasuke's ears perked up to the newfound information. Primary school buddies? <em>Che.</em></p><p>Hinata turned her head to Kiba. "Kiba, Naruto and I first met in high school and we're best friend ever since!"</p><p>Naruto rubbed his nose with his thumb smugly. "Yeah and that brooding guy over there," he uttered, cocking his head toward Sasuke, but he didn't look at him.</p><p>That was when Sasuke realized they hadn't told Naruto about the… news; the fact that it wasn't just 'best friends' between him and Hinata anymore. He caught the way Hinata smile awkwardly to him. Disclosing the matter here, with strangers he didn't care about wasn't an option. He diverted his eyes from Hinata's, nodding curtly as his response to Naruto's remark. They had to tell Naruto, it was a fact, and the sooner the better.</p><p>"This is great, why don't we have dinner together?" Naruto suggested excitedly, eyeing them expectantly before looking at the unintroduced duo sheepishly. "Ah, and I forgot to introduce you guys," he admitted, rubbing his nape. "Hinata, Sasuke, meet my roommates, Chouji," he said, bumping his elbow to the full belly of the more stout guy. "And Shikamaru, the <em>'genius'</em>." The so called genius with dark brown hair in a high ponytail rolled his eyes. Lazily he waved to them and Sasuke immediately recognized the name.</p><p>He heard Hinata gasp before covering her mouth with a hand. "So, you're the <em>Shikamaru</em>!"</p><p>Shikamaru widened his eyes in recognition then he nodded and rubbed his nape awkwardly. "Yeah."</p><p><em>He catches things quickly</em>, Sasuke mused, involuntarily acknowledging his intelligence.</p><p>Naruto squinted and turned his head to them to and fro. "The <em>Shikamaru?</em> Wait, have I mentioned my new roommates' name?<em>" </em>he asked suspiciously.</p><p>Hinata looked at Naruto, giggling. "No, you hadn't told us explicitly your new roommate's name. But, you did mention his name on one of our video calls… it was last year, I guess?"</p><p>Naruto didn't seem to remember and paid it no more mind. He shrugged before looking at them each on the eyes expectantly. "So, what about dinner?"</p><p>Sasuke groaned internally. And when Hinata agreed with a cheerful "Sure!", he did groan.</p><p>Hinata looked down to her body, highlighting the state of her wearing the lavender jacket with the price tag still intact, before smiling brightly at them each. "I need to make a purchase first."</p><p>Kiba nodded. "Cool, we'll wait outside," he stated, ushering the other three to follow him. Naruto lagged behind, looking at the remaining two over his shoulder surreptitiously.</p><p>Sasuke couldn't say he didn't sense there was something beneath his gaze. He followed Hinata toward the cashier to accompany her during the purchase. Somehow he felt the hair on his neck stood on end and he felt terribly ridiculous instantly. What was this feeling? He looked over his shoulder, subconsciously trying to find the blonde head behind the glass door through the asymetrical arrangement of stalls, mirrored pillars, and fully-equipped mannequins. The Uzumaki was staring at the sneakers he wore, both hands half hidden inside the pocket of his jeans.</p><p>"Sasuke," Hinata murmured.</p><p>Sasuke turned his head towards her, immediately his eyes caught her lithe fingers as she cautiously enter her PIN. "Hm?"</p><p>Still she murmured, "I think we need to tell Naruto." After nodding and giving her smile to the cashier, she looked up to him, eyes asking for confirmation.</p><p>"Yeah," he agreed promptly. Yet somehow a strange feeling he couldn't name flowed deep within his vasculature.</p><p>Dark eyes back seeking the sight of a blonde head subsconsciously, Sasuke vaguely heard Hinata convey her gratitude to the cashier before tugging him on the elbow. "Let's go, Sasuke."</p><p>They caught up the remaining group outside the outdoor store. The four of them walked at the front, seemingly to know their destination by heart. Sasuke walked silently alongside Hinata as she occasionally took a peek to the goods inside the paper bags she was holding, smiling contentedly. He couldn't help but to smile himself.</p><p>The four of them entered a <em>yakiniku </em>place with green, black, and red dominating the interior as if they were entering a house of one of them. Both Sasuke and Hinata paused and craned their neck upwards to look at the big sign written in intricate style of kanji which read "Akimichi". The sign and the restaurant itself looked old, but he didn't remember ever visiting the place; he wasn't a resident of Konoha that long anyway. Silently he looked to the beaming Hinata beside him.</p><p>"Ah, I used to frequently visit here when I was a child," she mused quietly.</p><p>"You did?" he asked curiously. His question sounded dumb, but she responded with no less vigor nonetheless, nodding excitedly.</p><p>"Yes, I remember I used to love eating here with my family as a whole."</p><p><em>With you mother, too? </em>He let the question go unannounced inside his mouth.</p><p>Hinata tugged the sleeve on his elbow again. She seemed to favor the gesture quite a lot. "Come on, I'm starving."</p><p>The four had already settled on the individual couches surrounding the rectangular low table. When Sasuke sat opposite of Naruto with Hinata followed suit beside him, the trays of their order had come alternately with different waiter each. No longer than the first batch of meat was served, the dark haired couple found out the restaurant was family owned by none other than Akimichi Chouji which explained the genial bearing of the stout man to the waiters there and the familiarity of the four of them to the particular restaurant which explained another interesting thing.</p><p>"Ah, so you're all in the same faculty?" Hinata asked attentively, leaving a piece of meat to be put again on her plate.</p><p>Naruto nodded. "Shikamaru was the first person I made friend with," he responded, eyes gleaming with excitement and not necessarily toward the topic of their conversation. Sasuke definitely sensed something, but he dropped the feeling down to the pit of his stomach. "Then he brought me to Chouji," he continued, pointing his chopsticks toward the said man. "Kiba and I met in our first lecture. We pursue the same major."</p><p>Hinata's mouth slightly parted in amazement, sinking in the new informations into her brain. "I see, Kiba-kun is a civil engineering student too," she murmured absentmindedly. Her eyes immediately widened, indicating a new piece of information she could only know had settled inside that mind of hers. "Ah! That reminds me of something… how is Shino-kun, Kiba-kun?"</p><p>Kiba immediately swallowed. "Yeah, Shino! You do remember him too."</p><p>"Of course!" Hinata immediately interjected.</p><p>Kiba chuckled. "He is a medical student in Suna U."</p><p>Hinata's eyes darted to Sasuke's, their contrasting pair of eyes widened in varying degrees. She returned her eyes to Kiba's narrowed ones. "Did I mention I'm a medical student too?"</p><p>Kiba chortled. "No, you didn't, but I can tell somehow. You both have that vibe." He cocked his head toward Sasuke.</p><p>Hinata flashed Sasuke a glance before laughing softly. "What vibe?"</p><p>"I don't know." Kiba waved his hands around him then shrugged. "Just that vibe."</p><p>Hinata laughed again. "Sasuke and I are medical students indeed! You're so cool to have guessed right, Kiba-kun! I so wish to meet Shino-kun someday. Is he back here yet?"</p><p>Kiba shook his head. "Nah, Shino still has some research I don't really care about."</p><p>Hinata nodded solemnly. Sasuke too just had finished his own portion of Professor Hatake's research project not two days ago.</p><p>"It's Konoha U, right?" Shikamaru added smartly.</p><p>"Yes," Hinata answered while Sasuke simply nodded.</p><p>Chouji decided to involve himself, still with mouth full of meat. "Then, you must know Ino."</p><p>Hinata flashed another glance to Sasuke before laughing again softly. "Absolutely!" She returned her attention toward Sasuke. "Sasuke, this is awesome."</p><p>The world is big, though at the time he must admit it wasn't really plausible to the revelation they had crashed upon. Their circle of friends connected somehow and it pleased her terribly he could tell. He couldn't say it didn't affect him just the same.</p><p>After the dessert had been served, Kiba stood and took the first leave saying he needed to watch his sister's veterinary clinic at a sudden notice. Shikamaru and Chouji were childhood friends, they practically considered each other's houses as their own so Shikamaru stayed behind. It left the three of them to exit the restaurant side by side with Hinata in the center.</p><p>Sasuke immediately sensed the artificial silence. It wasn't typical for the three of them without Naruto voicing whatever the things that passed through his head which resulting an immediate response from either him or Hinata. He had the urge to flash a look toward the blonde head that was his best friend, but there was some epiphany from the most rural compartment of his brain to do otherwise. So he glanced at Hinata instead, who was seemingly contented and didn't sense anything unusual, or if she did, it didn't show. Maybe he was just being weird over nothing.</p><p>But then again, Naruto did break the silence. It was always him. Always had been.</p><p>"Why didn't you two tell me you'd arrived?" he said casually, grinning with eyes the color of the ocean staring down at Hinata's profile.</p><p>"It must have slipped our minds," Hinata replied instantly, as if she had been thinking about her answer all this time. She offered him a sheepish smile. "Us coming home this week was a last moment decision."</p><p>It was no big deal, but Sasuke noticed the use of 'our' instead of singular possessive adjective. As if she voiced on behalf of them, which she did. It was no big deal, he had reassured himself, really. But when Naruto gave him an immediate a fraction of a second glance before returning his focus to Hinata, Sasuke could only think that Naruto, the most oblivious of them all, did manage to catch the insinuation.</p><p>"I just finished a project with a professor of ours," Sasuke offered, sounding defensive without intending to. Because the thought of telling Naruto did slip their minds. Everything other than about themselves had slipped their minds.</p><p>Naruto nodded absently. If it didn't satisfy him, he didn't show it. "Where did you park your car?" he asked as they reached the intersection.</p><p>"Just behind this block," answered Hinata helpfully, pointing to their right.</p><p>Naruto just stared at her hair and his gaze was what one would define as <em>soft</em>. "Your new hair looks nicer in person," he blurted absentmindedly. Catching himself, he chuckled, shaking his head lightly. "Funny I parked my car on the left side." He ruffled his wild blonde hair as he grinned brightly. "Well, see you tomorrow, I guess?"</p><p>Hinata nodded vigorously before she blushed, eyes downcast for a split second. "Actually, we have something to tell you…" Sasuke snapped his head toward Hinata. Whatever he had in mind was coming too late before she continued. "…Sasuke and I are now dating."</p><p>Silence stretched between them. Sasuke looked at Naruto closely, observing any shift of expression. He could sense the anxious look from Hinata on him. Naruto's eyes widened a tad bit too late. He didn't seem to be more than less surprised. Which was unusual for Naruto as he was a full or none kind of guy and most of the times were always on the former.</p><p>"Oh? Congratulations," he finally uttered before grinning and rubbing his nape. "Congratulations, you both!" He smacked Sasuke's shoulder. "That was… startling." He raked a hand on his hair, looking more frustrated than startled as he had conveyed. "Guess see you tomorrow, then, and make sure to tell me the whole thing." Still grinning, he winked at Hinata, flashed Sasuke a look, then he turned away and waved a hand as he farthering away.</p><p>Sasuke didn't want to acknowledge that Naruto had been avoiding his eyes the entire time until last moment.</p><p>"Why didn't you tell him?" Hinata asked through clenched teeth.</p><p>Sasuke turned his head toward her subconsciously but still with eyes locking to the receding blonde head. "You <em>did </em>tell him."</p><p>Hinata encircled his elbow with an arm to turn him around and tug him as they made their way to his car. "I was waiting for you! And you didn't seem like you were about to say something."</p><p>"Why were you waiting for me?"</p><p>"I don't know… I think I was nervous."</p><p>Nervous? Why would she be nervous around Naruto? What reason to justify the need to be nervous? They are best friends and practically share everything without restraint for as long as he could remember. It had always been the way they interacted. The notion of being nervous was simply ludicrous.</p><p>But when the warmth of Hinata's arm left his side and it was time that he had to touch the cold of the driver's door handle, it hit him <em>hard</em>. What was the feeling he had been feeling the entire time Naruto was within the vicinity? What was keeping him from not telling Naruto himself and waiting for Hinata to do the deed instead?</p><p>Because <em>he </em>was nervous. It was what he had been feeling.</p><p>Igniting the engine, subsequently a new realization hit him harder. As usual, Naruto had generously smiled—even grinned from ear to ear—the entire time today. But everytime his bright blue eyes locked to his dark ones, they were everything but.</p><hr/><p>One particular emotion he rarely felt was anger. But it wasn't difficult to distinguish once he felt the emotion flow deep within his veins. He was damn angry. He was angry at the disclosing revelation before him. He was angry at the situation he was in; the way he'd found out. He was angry at <em>them</em>. But over all of the reasons he'd tried to collect, he was angry at himself most.</p><p>And he felt betrayed.</p><p>And beyond foolish.</p><p>The last time he saw them was last year and a year wasn't really a long time relatively, particularly for the three of them best friends of seven years and for him and that dark haired brooding guy, best friend of his of seventeen years. He had to reflect back where he did wrong. Where things started to go wrong. The recent winter break was the first for them not coming back to their hometown. He had thought it was just the thing for the majority of senior year in college.</p><p>How wrong of him to presume only to find out in the end things could change so much in the span of one year.</p><p>He had only one thing in his mind since his waking from restless sleep. He and Sasuke needed to talk.</p><p>And when Sasuke blearily opened his door and grunted at the sight of him first thing in the morning, Naruto had the strong urge to punch him.</p><p>"We agreed to meet not until after ten, Naruto," Sasuke said irritatedly, stifling a yawn with his fist.</p><p>Naruto ignored him, sidestepping to enter his house casually. "Since when I can't visit you outside the formally planned time?"</p><p>Sasuke groaned, closing the door. "It's only seven thirty."</p><p>"Yeah?" Naruto looked at him over his shoulder. "I bet you would be pleased if I were Hinata instead."</p><p>The initial lazy stare Sasuke had for him shifted into a wary one. "What? What are you trying to say?"</p><p>Naruto clicked his tongue and ignored him, walking off toward the staircase. He heard the muffled response from his best friend as he followed him behind. "What the hell, Naruto?"</p><p>When he paid Sasuke no mind, Sasuke raised his voice slightly. "Naruto, you can't just barge in my house and not even telling whatever do you want."</p><p>Naruto halted in front of Sasuke's room. He turned around to face Sasuke. "Yeah? I can't even do whatever I want in the house of my best friend of seventeen fucking years now?"</p><p>"Naruto, what the fuck?" Sasuke hissed. "My parents are sleeping downstairs and Itachi—"</p><p>The door next to his opened unceremoniously, revealing a tired Itachi complete with the dark shadow under the eyes. "Whatever business you two have, keep it down, will you?"</p><p>Naruto sneered, eyes fixated on the door. "Don't worry, we will," he replied tonelessly, opening the door to Sasuke's room and closing it behind him without waiting for the owner of the room.</p><hr/><p>"What did you do this time?" said Itachi mechanically to Sasuke for he had asked the question far too frequent in their lives.</p><p>"I hope it's not what I think it is," Sasuke replied calmly, opening his door and entering the room easily.</p><p>Somehow, the calmness Sasuke had posed and the soft thud the door had made after being closed didn't conceal his unease under the scrutinity of his older brother's eyes, despite the sleepy state they were in. Itachi sighed and withdrew to his room, silently thinking whatever problems they had, they were theirs to be bothered, not his.</p><p>The second Sasuke closed his door, Naruto, standing right in the middle of the bed and the closet, struck him with a tonelessly uttered question. "Were you even thinking of telling me this?"</p><p>Sasuke watched him warily. A nonchalant Naruto was a rare sight he had known too well not to encounter ever again, because deep inside he was anything but nonchalant. Yet, here we go. "Of course," he ventured calmly, "we did tell you."</p><p>"Isn't it a bit too much only telling me after everything has been official?" Naruto let a notable silence hang as he raked a hand on his hair. "I'll cut it short. Sasuke, weren't you like platonic to Hinata?"</p><p>Still looking at him closely and calmly, Sasuke replied honestly. "I like her, Naruto. I've liked her for quite a while."</p><p>"How come you didn't tell me any of this before?"</p><p>So it was about the very thing he had been presuming. He really did think he didn't need to tell Naruto about his personal affairs and his initial view of it remained standing firm. But he did feel bad not telling Naruto beforehand and only disclosing the matter to him at the last moment.</p><p>"Am I like… your best friend?" Naruto continued. Sasuke instantly felt awful, catching the hurt within the depth of his bright blue eyes. "I'm still your and Hinata's best friend, right?"</p><p>"Naruto, if this is about us not telling then—"</p><p>"I thought despite you both share an apartment and uni and everything, we are the best friends that do talk everything out between us three. But, what is this? I've always felt left out, you know? But I knew you didn't intend to, you both have the same thing in everything that only revolves around you that I don't and I have no control of it. So I just went with it, you know? I put those things aside and I was just contented with the fact that we are still best friends despite everything."</p><p>Sasuke waited but Naruto gave no indication he'd continue any further. "Naruto," he began calmly, but damn his heart rate quickened almost too fast. All he needed was to say he was sorry, right? He genuinely felt bad that Naruto had felt being left out within their group of three persons. He'd need to treat him a bowl of ramen—or two. Then everything would turn out just fine—</p><p>"God, Sasuke, I like her."</p><p>—or it wasn't as simple as that.</p><p>Sasuke widened his eyes and he didn't even bother to conceal the state of slack-jawed he was in. Because he was utterly dumbstruck. "…Come again?"</p><p>"I like her for years, Sasuke."</p><p>"What? How?" Sasuke mentally cursed himself for acting dumbly. His brain was bombarded by whats, hows, and whens he didn't have in him to act so composed anymore.</p><p>"Why do you think I stuck around you so much in school even though we were in different class and we hang out after school almost everyday?" He paused. "Yes, I was your best friend—only friend—at the moment but then I noticed you were always with Hinata and she is your neighbor apparently so that's why."</p><p>Sasuke was still utterly stupefied. It was hard to process the most unthinkable to be real. There were no signs, no clues. And if Naruto had been masking his feelings deliberately, he had succeeded immaculately. He looked closely to the best friend he had known for the longest time. Who the hell was Naruto? "Why didn't you tell me?"</p><p>"Damn it, Sasuke, I just realized that right after you two went to the same school without me. And I was jealous. Not because you two kinda left me out but because I like her and I couldn't be with her as much as I wanted like before. Damn, Sasuke, I like her."</p><p>It was instantaneous that Sasuke recalled how Hinata had liked Naruto once upon a time in high school and the fact that he was the only one that knew about their feelings toward each other, although not simulataneously. Still, he felt oddly guilt, knowing if in the past he had taken a different path to help Hinata reach out to Naruto or vice versa then he wouldn't be the boyfriend right now. Something solid just fell into the pit of his stomach.</p><p><em>No, </em>it couldn't be.</p><p>He was the boyfriend and nothing would ever have the power to change that. He simply wouldn't allow it.</p><p>"And I always observed you two to be simply helping each other, after all she really wanted to go to Konoha Med School and you helped her a lot so I was relieved. When you two told me you decided to share an apartment I was—absolutely—concerned and I envied you at first but you never once showed any attraction to her and you two have complained a lot in our freshmen year how you were adapting into medschool so I thought things could wait. But, I'll be damned, I guess I waited too long, huh? I didn't know what happened to you in the course of three—what?—four years, and I know this is entirely my fault but I feel so betrayed, you know?"</p><p>Another realization hit him; he almost fell to the predicament Naruto was in right now had he not encountered Gaara back in the early spring. "Naruto—"</p><p>"Shut up, just let me finish, will you? I know this is entirely and utterly my fault but just shut up. It was fucking hard for me, you know? We barely meet with different uni and all and I've been having the fear of knowing if I decided to try this out, it could change the dynamic between us. I mean we already have the balance, and I was wondering to talk to you first about it, what should I do about my fucking feelings. But I kept on hesitating. I'm fucking trying to protect the thing between the three of us but look what I've got?"</p><p>Sasuke looked away, couldn't hold anymore eye contact with him, because he felt awful. He was an awful excuse of a friend, let alone best friend.</p><p>"I did want to visit you guys seeing you wouldn't have time to visit me." Naruto gave a derisive laugh. "After two years, I kept on second guessing, my schedule sometimes were unpredictable, yours too, so I guessed for the moment, summer time was enough, almost more than enough. Then came third year. I got more projects to deal with, got less time to sleep, and they were all fucking group projects that I needed to adjust my schedule with my mates." Naruto turned around and stomped to the opposite way of him, running both hands to his hair frustratedly. "Fuck, why am I telling you all about this?"</p><p>It was the first time Sasuke didn't have any fucking idea of what to do. He <em>always </em>knew what to do. Particularly anything associated with Naruto was <em>always </em>easy. The situation he was in now, however, was not even close.</p><p>Naruto turned his head to the side while his back was still facing Sasuke. "I know telling you won't make any difference." He sighed defeatedly. "She likes you too, right?"</p><p>When he didn't hear any answer, Naruto half-turned toward Sasuke only to find he was staring at him intently. And Naruto got it.</p><p>"Then, fuck. I can't do anything about it. I'll always be left out."</p><p>Sasuke opened his lips only to be interjected by Naruto. "Shut—"</p><p>Sasuke gripped his shoulders. "No, you listen to me. First of all, I'm sorry if you've been feeling left out, Naruto. Really, I'm sorry, it wasn't our intention, after all we always meet on the summer and video calling and all to stay connected. You see? We tried. We are busy with school you are you, it's hard to have the same schedule." Saying they'd try improve the situation wouldn't help. He didn't even know if Naruto still wanted to be friends.</p><p>"Second, I like Hinata, I care for her not just as friends and I'm not sorry about it at all. I'm sorry it didn't work out for you, yes, you should've tried and showed that you like her if you really do like her. And I'm not overstepping any bound, so I hope you will understand.</p><p>"Third, you are my best friend. It'd hurt me great deal to know I hurt you somehow because I'm in a relationship with Hinata. But I have no intention to back away, Naruto. I do value you as a close friend of mine and I don't want to lose you. But I don't want to stop liking her just so we can still be friends."</p><p>Naruto turned his head away. "I know, damn it." He shrugged off Sasuke's hands forcefully. "And I'm not asking you to choose, damn it, Sasuke, I'm not that fucking low."</p><p>"So what are you suggesting for me to do now? Breaking up with her?" Sasuke mentally hit himself. Why the <em>fuck </em>did he have to say that? He was in the wrong, he had no right to be angry. Naruto had all rights to be angry and towards him.</p><p>Naruto glared at him. "Fuck, no, Sasuke. Are you fucking insane? Stop being a douche." Naruto took a step behind. "This," he gestured the space between them vigorously, "stays between us. And one thing, Sasuke, one thing." He shoved one index finger to Sasuke's chest. "I won't ever look at you the same anymore. Every fucking time your face comes into view, I'll have the urge to punch your pretty face. I just know it."</p><p>Sasuke nodded tensely, anticipating every word he was about to tell next restlessly.</p><p>"You fucking promise me not to hurt her. Or else, I'll be the first one to step in."</p><p>"I promise."</p><p>The determination in his eyes and answer must have encouraged Naruto to punch a wall, but he didn't. "Fuck."</p><p>Instead he opened the door unceremoniously, slamming the door closed behind him forcefully and he left.</p><p>Sasuke stood unbudging for another minutes.</p><p>Everything felt so wrong but he didn't know who or what to blame.</p><p>What had become of them after this, really?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Did you see it coming?..... *looks away nervously*</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>.</p><p>dis·clo·sure (1,2)</p><p>(1) the action of making new or secret information known;</p><p>(2) a fact, especially a secret, that is made known</p><p>.</p><hr/><p>"What did you do again this time?"</p><p>Sasuke snapped his head to the protruding head of his brother, flanked by the slightly parted door and the door frame. It hadn't even taken five minutes since Naruto had slammed the very same door. Itachi, as ever, the punctual.</p><p>"I'm always the trouble, aren't I?"</p><p>"Geez." Itachi opened the door wide and brought himself in. "Stop being dramatic, little brother." He closed the door then sat on the edge of the bed. "It's something real this time, huh?"</p><p>Itachi, as ever, the percipient.</p><p>Sasuke ran a hand to his hair. "I don't—"</p><p>"—want to talk about it." They both said at once.</p><p>"Yeah, I get it." Itachi nodded idly, eyeing the curve of his little brother's nose from the side. His eyes met the same dark eyes when Sasuke, who was sitting on his desk, turned his head. "You always did the same thing and I always let it slide knowing they were just another idiotic quarrels between you two. But, Sasuke, Naruto never sneered at me, or you. Not even once, no matter how much he was angry at the time. You know it better than I do."</p><p>"Just don't, Itachi," Sasuke hissed. "You knowing won't change anything."</p><p>Itachi chuckled dryly. "This isn't about me knowing. It's about you venting. Didn't they give you lectures about mental health already? It's your field, you should've known better than me."</p><p>"Just shut up, Itachi-<em>niisan</em>."</p><p>The emphasis on their childhood title meant trouble. But Itachi wasn't one to back away. If anything, it fueled him even more. "Is Hinata coming?"</p><p>The utterance came too suddenly it caught Sasuke off guard for he instantly widened his eyes. "Why are you dragging her into this?"</p><p>Itachi's lips quirked almost instantly. "So it's about her. For the record, I was just asking if she was coming."</p><p>"It's not about her," Sasuke asserted, staring hard at his laptop atop the desk.</p><p>"Don't you realize you're not admitting only proving otherwise?"</p><p>"Do you really have to be like this, Itachi?"</p><p>"Of course," uttered Itachi firmly, "I'm your older brother."</p><p>Sasuke sighed in defeat, staring at him out the corner of his eyes. "Sometimes I wish I was the older brother."</p><p>Itachi chuckled. "Yeah? I wouldn't want to be your little brother."</p><p>Returning his eyes to settle on his laptop, Sasuke snorted weakly; he couldn't agree more. He returned his eyes to look at Itachi, letting the silence float before relenting. "Naruto likes Hinata," he said quietly.</p><p>It barely give away anything. Yet, Itachi's gaze softened almost too instantly, as if he understood wholly. "Naruto as the one who left could only mean that… Well, with the way you acted all this time, being dumb deliberately or just naturally, I thought you wouldn't make a move this fast."</p><p>Sasuke scoffed; he wasn't surprised. "You knew."</p><p>Itachi crossed his arms over his chest. "I know you. The moment you brought Hinata home the first time, I just knew. You weren't experienced in the field of male-female relationship yet you stuck around her practically everytime and you thought all this time it was simply platonic. Really? It's about time you figure it out yourself. It's always either you give no shit about someone or you deeply care about them. Never in between, Sasuke." Itachi paused, letting his words to sink in before he continued solemnly, "Since when?"</p><p>Sasuke flashed him a glance. He didn't know whether Itachi implying the time they started going out or another thing altogether. Somehow Sasuke opposed the terms '<em>going out</em>', or '<em>dating</em>', or '<em>seeing someone</em>'. Because what he and Hinata had right now was something different. Much much different. Something he had no knowledge on how to name their connection. "Somewhen in April," he admitted quietly, treading on the safe ground. It was no use denying anymore anyway.</p><p>"I can imagine Hinata having a part in it. The fact is, you are hopeless, Sasuke." Itachi lightly bit on the nail of his left thumb, watching Sasuke scowled at his remark. "Tell me, when did <em>you</em> realize?"</p><p>Sasuke's scowl deepened as if in a deep thought. "Last winter," he voiced carefully.</p><p>"Hmm, quite a while."</p><p>"Actually, no, it was autumn."</p><p>Itachi smirked. "Even better."</p><p>"No, it was summer." Sasuke looked at Itachi, his eyes were almost <em>desperate</em>. Noticing the grow on his smirk, Sasuke snapped. "<em>Fuck</em>, I don't know. I-I don't know, Itachi. All I know…"</p><p>"All you know...?"</p><p>Sasuke's eyes widened gradually, staring at Itachi unseeingly as if he were looking at something Itachi couldn't see. "I…," he trailed off, pursing his lips closed before letting all out. "You're right," he surrendered, giving out a sigh. "I've always felt this way."</p><p>For the first time that day, Itachi smiled sincerely. "I'm proud of you little brother." He tapped his upper arm with his fingers. "And if I have a say in this, in my opinion, you didn't do anything wrong unless you hadn't told Naruto beforehand—" Sasuke turned his head away promptly. "—which you apparently hadn't." Silence ensued as Itachi's eyes widened. "Don't tell me it was because you had no idea?"</p><p>Sasuke turned his head sharply, glaring at Itachi. "How am I supposed to know when he didn't say anything?"</p><p>His elder brother sighed. "Sasuke, not everything has to be said verbally to make it perceptible. I can't say it wasn't Naruto's fault either. Maybe…" Itachi rubbed his temple with his index finger. "You two just need to work more on, err, your communication and understanding toward each other. It's never wrong to frequently talk things out with your best friend, Sasuke. Have that in mind."</p><p>Well, easier said than done.</p><p>Both knew Sasuke's flaw in the realm of communication skills hence the problem they were facing in the first place. But Sasuke knew better it was the only feasible option he could take. He had no other option and Itachi was simply being practical.</p><p>Itachi, as ever, the pragmatic.</p><p>A soft set of knocks was heard from the door, catching their attention for the moment. The same voice that had sung lullabies to both of them when they were children was heard from behind the door. "Sasuke? Itachi?"</p><p>Sasuke languidly stood and started off to reach the door. He opened the door wide enough for Mikoto to look at their two handsome sons. At the sight of her already young adults children, Mikoto instantly smiled. Itachi returned the smile and noticed the way his mother was formally dressed. "You're leaving now, Mother?"</p><p>Mikoto nodded, latching both hands on the hips. "Yes. Now, boys, don't you think it's time to have your breakfast?"</p><p>Itachi idly glanced at the clock hung on the wall above Sasuke's desk. "We will, in five minutes."</p><p>Mikoto clicked his tongue. "Just finish the—" She flashed a glance at the scowling Sasuke and her eyes stayed. "—brotherly talk, you two. Sasuke, is something wrong?" She frowned, grasping his youngest son's shoulder lightly.</p><p>Sasuke shook his head stiffly. Itachi came into his rescue playing the role of the elder brother he was. "Mother, is Father waiting in the car?"</p><p>Mikoto widened her eyes; the very eyes her children had inherited from. "You are absolutely right. All right, five minutes." She darted her eyes from the youngest to the eldest son. "Be strict to your own words, boys." She flicked an index finger to ensure her point was taken.</p><p>Itachi winked. "Of course."</p><p>Sasuke cleared his throat, trusting his voice enough at last. "Be safe, Mother."</p><p>Chuckling warmly, Mikoto hugged her youngest son, running a hand through his locks lovingly. "Of course, my adorable son." She looked at Itachi meaningfully before pulling away from Sasuke. "Okay, I'm leaving. I'll be home at nine. Do you have any plans, Sasuke?" Before Sasuke had a chance to answer, however, Mikoto turned around and walked off, leaving behind a mumbled, "invite Hinata over and have dinner with her."</p><p>Noting the light footsteps on the stairs diminishing, Itachi stood and walked toward Sasuke. "I'll have my breakfast now, little brother." Pausing before the door, Itachi turned his head lightly toward him. "Things have been done. All you can do is to amend things; no need grand changes, just make him feel needed, included. That's easy, eh? And be patient, give him time. He'll come around eventually." He tapped Sasuke's shoulder encouragingly before he walked off.</p><p>Sasuke nodded stiffly, watching as Itachi left him to ponder things through in the quietness of his room.</p><p>Every damn thing Itachi had said was right.</p><p>
  <em>Not everything has to be said verbally to be perceptible.</em>
</p><p>But what things was he supposed to see for himself? The fact that every lunch break Naruto would go to his class to meet him? To eat lunch with him—</p><p>Sasuke felt her heart rate quicken.</p><p>—his long time best friend.</p><p>Unless…it wasn't him that had been encouraging Naruto to stick around so much at all.</p><p>He had been so full of himself he failed to see it. He had been thinking all Naruto had cared—aside from ramen—was to hang out with him. All this time, he'd simply deemed it was plausible. Now that he tried to see from another perspective, he saw <em>reasons.</em></p><p>Next thing he knew, all the flickering images of hints vividly passed through his mind obstacle-free. One by one.</p><p>It was Hinata who Naruto had called first on every lunch break, when everytime they encountered him on the hallway, and everytime he'd go to their class after the last session. When they were moving in to their new apartment four years ago, Naruto had come with them to lend a hand. Sasuke hadn't needed any help. Hinata had. And Naruto had been there solely to that reason. Everytime Naruto hung around in his house, he'd ask Hinata's whereabout first thing when entering the doorway. And on every Hinata's birthday he'd ask him what to buy as if he spared no room to failure.</p><p>And… every damn time they were together, his bright blue eyes would always be fixated to her.</p><p>Sasuke cursed himself for being blind and so damn stupid all this time. There were more reachable hints in his memory he could dig more but he decided to stop. He groaned, applying pressure to his temples with both hands. He had the great urge to punch something and at the moment his own face seemed to be the most fitting.</p><p>How could he don't see them when things had always been so vivid? He had seen them, he admitted. He had simply disregarded the matter. He had failed to put things together, to make sense of everything.</p><p>Because it wasn't only Naruto who had been solely focusing on Hinata.</p><p>He had been as well.</p><p>Hinata.</p><p>The petite dark haired beauty with the ever present blush on the cheeks, who probably had no idea the extent of her one little smile had impacted them.</p><p>Sasuke's eyes softened marginally. Everytime she appeared in his mind he simply had no complete control of it. And he welcomed it willingly. And he had no reason to change everything he had at the moment. And Hinata was someone who was worth fighting for.</p><p>It would be the best thing to keep this to himself, he reasoned. Naruto had demanded him to keep this to themselves; to evade involving Hinata. But Hinata needed to know. Not because she deserved to know, when in fact she did, but it was simply because Sasuke was selfish. He had known himself that much to admit it so easily. Hinata needed to know because she was his girlfriend. Because he cared for her and trusted her deeply he felt the need to tell her the predicament that was troubling him. He needed her to see more reasons, to ask for advices, to seek for comfort.</p><p>But of course, he couldn't ignore the matter regarding Naruto. He had wronged him enough, yet he had just planned to make things worse. Itachi's voice persistently echoed inside his head with his <em>reliable </em>advices. True, it was never wrong to vent particularly if he had an older brother like Itachi. Sasuke scoffed, though he seemed indignant, it was simply out of relief.</p><p>Punctual, percipient, and pragmatic. What a perfect brother Sasuke had.</p><p>And to that, he was profoundly grateful.</p><p>
  <em>Just make him feel needed, included.</em>
</p><p><em>You're right again, eh, Itachi? </em>Sasuke sneered weakly. It was evitable but he had to disappoint Hinata just for this time. Their trip together alone could wait. Their friendship with Naruto could not.</p><p>
  <em>He'll come around eventually.</em>
</p><p>Of course. He just needed to hang onto those words. Hopefully '<em>eventually</em>' wouldn't be so long.</p><p>The only '<em>long</em>' he needed at the moment was a damn long shower as a deversion from overly thinking things through. He so needed to just relax and stop that overly complacent (as what had been perceived by his mind) voice of that older brother of his from perpetually talking inside his head. If only for a relatively brief of time.</p><hr/><p>Couldn't hold the hunger anymore than he already did, Sasuke quickly dressed and descended the stairs for breakfast. When he reached the kitchen Itachi, already in his formal attire, was sitting on the chair facing the stairs. Itachi's gaze raised from the phone on his hand to the youngest Uchiha. "Freshened up?"</p><p>Sasuke nodded, making his way to the overhead cabinet containing the bowls.</p><p>As he turned around to face the kitchen island with the rice cooker, the older Uchiha stood and walked to the other side of the island. "Is Hinata coming?" Itachi asked casually, idly glancing at his watch.</p><p>Sasuke paused for a moment before opening the rice cooker and helping himself with the rice. He nodded again.</p><p>What occurred next was happening too fast. But owing to Sasuke's refined reflex, or he just had enough experience in the field of dodging, he jerked his head backwards right in time before Itachi's fingers had the luxury to brush his forehead.</p><p>Itachi laughed and didn't proceed further. "Good, I can leave my brother alone with ease."</p><p>Sasuke scowled at his remark. And the scowl remained until Itachi informed his leave. Still remained even until he was washing the dishes. But when his phone vibrated to inform the arrival of Hinata's text, it wasn't difficult from the scowl to shift into a small smile.</p><p>
  <em>
    <strong>Sasuke, I'm outside.</strong>
  </em>
</p><hr/><p>When the door to his house swung inward it revealed her boyfriend. At the sight of her, Sasuke let a small smile and moved aside to make room for her to enter. "Hey," he greeted.</p><p>Hinata, who had been smiling even before she reached his porch, stepped into the doorway easily. "Hey, I bring us <em>onigiri</em>."</p><p>As she regarded the faint nod Sasuke give her, she immediately noted the tranquility inside, which could only mean one thing. "Eh? Naruto's not here already?"</p><p>Sasuke closed the door behind her gently before turning around and beckoning her to walk forward. Looking forward, he shook his head once.</p><p>Hinata started off with him rather hesitantly, pondering the unusual. "Why… I thought he wanted us to spill everything." Something nudged her on the ankle, she halted and glanced down, not without noticing Sasuke shrugged distractedly, rubbing his nape.</p><p>"Let's…plan this trip of yours," he said lowly.</p><p>Staring down at the fluffy Persian cat, Hinata blushed. Not to the fact the cat had found her, obviously. "Aka-chan!" She squealed, crouching down to spoil the black furred cat with her beloved rubbing, while distractedly noticing Sasuke did the same. "It's yours," she uttered meekly, rising her head enough to look at his eyes.</p><p>Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her, cuddling up Aka-chan before standing.</p><p>"Ours," she amended with voice barely audible before repeating more firmly. "It's ours."</p><p>Somewhat smirking, Sasuke shook his head and beckoned her to walk with him. He was amused, that much she could tell.</p><p>Hinata dusted her skirt, stood up, and started off with him toward the staircase. "Where are your parents and Itachi-niisan?"</p><p>"Not here," he replied, adjusting Aka-chan on his embrace with a scowl on his face. "That much I can tell."</p><p>Hinata giggled at the sight, it was too cute not to. "All right, I'll stop digging to the <em>privacy </em>of the Uchiha."</p><p>Sasuke scoffed. Hinata couldn't stop her smile from growing. She loved this. She loved talking to Sasuke. She loved how they'd take their conversation to. Always had been, always did.</p><p>"Hinata," he called suddenly when they'd reached his door, a hand loosely grasping the knob. She sensed his hesitation for whatever he was about to say, but it wasn't one to deter her smile though.</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>What he said next though had the sides of her lips to turn downward abruptly. "Should we invite Naruto to the trip?"</p><p>Hinata stopped in her tracks, watching Sasuke stepping inside before turning around to find she wasn't doing the same. She didn't hear wrong… did she?</p><p>"What's wrong?" he asked easily, putting Aka-chan on the bed gently before sitting on the edge of the bed himself.</p><p>That had to be her line at the moment. She thought Sasuke was on the same page with her about the trip. This trip was to be his birthday present from her as his girlfriend. Why would he want to invite Naruto? The way he was asking if they should invite Naruto was indeed marred with hesitancy, but that wasn't the main problem here although she couldn't ignore it still.</p><p>The main problem now was; did hereally think despite the fact that she had thoroughly planned the trip for the two of them with whatever initial insecurities she had before finally trying to disclose the mere idea to him, she would easily agree to his proposal?</p><p>She raised her eyes to meet his, eyes wide, staring at him incredulously and she tried her best to keep her tone neutral. "To <em>our </em>trip?"</p><p>"Yeah," he responded.</p><p>Maybe because she was not keen for unnecessary arguments. Or she was too tired to introduce the idea of "overnight trip for couple" and ensure it goes through that hard skull of his. Or because it was his birthday anyway so he could do whatever.</p><p>"Should we?" she asked with a defeated sigh.</p><p>When Sasuke just simply nodded, she ignored the urge to shake her head at him in disbelief.</p><p>"Call him."</p><p>Did he just order her to call Naruto when he was the one that wanted to invite him? She snorted mentally. She was utterly dumbstruck. As if it wasn't enough, what startled her more was when she automatically rummaged through her bag to find her phone then called Naruto's number. She hadn't even entered his room.</p><p>Stiffly stepping inside after closing the door, it didn't take more than the first three rings for Naruto to answer. "Naruto?"</p><p>"Uh, Hinata. Is Sasuke there?"</p><p>"Yes, why?" Hinata sat on the edge of the bed next to Sasuke, flashing him a glance. "Do you want to talk to him?"</p><p>"No. What is it?" Naruto's response was immediate and to that Hinata raised an eyebrow.</p><p>Hinata bit her lip. Why did she feel awkward all of a sudden? She shrugged off her bag distractedly and let it land on top of the bed. "Why did you cancel coming here in the last minute?"</p><p>There was a pause from his end before he cleared his throat. "I have, ugh," Naruto replied throatily, then he cleared his throat again. "I have something to do. It's my mother."</p><p>Hinata turned her head to Sasuke, looking at him questioningly. Sasuke's eyes only mirrored her stare. "Do you want to have dinner with us?"</p><p>"No, no, I can't. We'll just meet next week, okay?"</p><p>"Okay…" Hinata nodded idly, biting her lip again. "Well, actually, about next week, it's Sasuke's birthday." She let the pause hang and Naruto gave no indication of an immediate response. "We—actually, I'm planning for a trip up on the mountain. Do you want to join us, Naruto?"</p><p>She looked at Sasuke again and waited long for an answer from the other line, which was…odd. Naruto was always jovial and impulsive about trips. To him, a 'no' was never an option to begin with. After a notable silence, he responded at last. "You two have fun, let's meet after your trip."</p><p>His voice sounded neutral. Toneless. Too emotionless for Naruto.</p><p>Hinata's eyes widened. "Why? Why wouldn't you come with us?"</p><p>"It's your plans, I don't want to ruin it."</p><p>That must have been the most mature version of an answer coming from Naruto. If it wasn't her own ear playing with her mind, she didn't know what else. This person, this voice which undoubtedly was Naruto's, couldn't possibly come from the same Naruto she had known all these years. Was it a form of acceptance and support from him to their current relationship? Did he finally realize the affections she and Sasuke shared to each other and he finally opted to encourage them?</p><p>"You're not going to ruin it, Naruto," she reassured, chuckling in defeat. Next thing she knew, she found herself thanking him. "But, thank you… for understanding."</p><p>Naruto snickered. "See? I know."</p><p>Hinata chuckled, bringing a hand to cover her mouth. She glanced at Sasuke. "Don't you want to talk to Sasuke? You only met him last night, it's rare for you not to hang out with him."</p><p>Hinata sensed Sasuke shift uncomfortably beside her.</p><p>From the other side of the line, she heard Naruto chortle. "Just because. I'm giving you free time with him, you're not going to be grateful?"</p><p>"What? No way!" Hinata laughed heartily. Her eyes settled to the sight before her; Sasuke, who was giving his full attention to rub on Aka-chan's spine gently. She smiled, her heart swelling with emotions and all of them culminating positively. "But of course I am, greatly. And… Naruto?"</p><p>When she called Naruto's name, Sasuke turned his gaze to her slowly. Her smile widened, unaware to the growing wariness beneath the dark of his eyes.</p><p>"Yes, Hinata."</p><p>"Nothing will ever change between us three. You know this. Right, Naruto?" She was talking to Naruto but her eyes were fixated only to Sasuke.</p><p>And so was her heart.</p><p>"Of course."</p><p>She imagined Naruto to be grinning from ear to ear right now. But hearing the way his voice sounded so detached, she realized she'd be lying to herself. Her smile faltered if only just a fraction. Sasuke's hand hovered midair, interrupting his previous occupation on spoiling his cat.</p><p>And Hinata was relieved somehow because she knew Sasuke knew. Whatever it was; the faltering of her smile, or the reason behind it, or both. He knew.</p><p>"Alright, then," she voiced softly, "I guess, see you next week?"</p><p>"Great." Came Naruto's cheerful sounded reply. Somehow, even though there no need, she felt the need to reassure herself it was out of sheer joy and held no other meaning. "Hinata?"</p><p>"Yes, Naruto?"</p><p>"You happy?"</p><p>She stared long at Sasuke and she never felt more certain. "I am," she said confidently. She was happy and she wished for happiness to Naruto as well. "You?"</p><p>"As long as Sasuke doesn't do stupid things."</p><p>At that, Hinata laughed wholeheartedly. At last, the answer that would undoubtedly come from the Naruto she knew. "See you next week, Naruto."</p><p>"Take your time, Hinata." He paused. "Sasuke," he said at last before hanging up.</p><hr/><p>It was one thing to decide telling Hinata about everything. But it was a whole different thing to turn his intention into action. Sasuke couldn't find the best way possible to introduce the matter into their conversation, let alone conveying everything. Moreover with her overly excited demeanor in discussing the detailed (alterable) itineries for their trip (in which she had made it clear to be their priority everytime they met), he simply had no heart to ruin it. He needed to see that smiles of hers, simply because he was just that selfish. He was selfish even for his own selfish needs, if that even makes sense.</p><p>But even with the personalised procrastination in his part, it was inevitable for Hinata to finally catch things. He was too detached, consistently getting distracted; there was no way Hinata wouldn't notice.</p><p>It culminated when it was time for their trip.</p><p>It wasn't wrong to say Hinata had been too occupied in planning the trips, so she had remained silent, holding onto that belief. But when she had no other things to be planned—meaning the first day of their trip, which meant just a day before Sasuke's birthday—she had all the right and time and opportunity to ensure everything run smoothly and perfectly. And it had become the major thing for her to pay attention heedfully to stabilize the state of mental and emotional of the sole reason of this trip to be exist in the form of a person that was slowly walking beside her with 70L backpack straped on his shoulders and waist. Because it was all it needed for her wishes to turn into reality.</p><p>The weather was great, it didn't rain and the forecast had said nothing about impending rain, they didn't leave anything behind, even to the simplest and frivolous thing in the form of Hinata's second piece of scrunchie. In short, they came prepared with everything hence it could only arise the promise of a perfect trip. Yet Hinata didn't see it in Sasuke. She started off the trip feeling contented, excited, even energized. Clearly Sasuke did not share the same emotions as her and it hurt her more because she saw no reason for him to be upset.</p><p>But she was panting at the moment. Just the sight of the steep elevation before them was enough to make her catching her breath forcefully. "S-Sasuke," she panted, "w-wait, please."</p><p>Sasuke instantly scowled as he retreated back to her then loosened all her straps. "Bow," he demanded, applying gentle pressure to her backpack. Hinata—still panting—did as told; bowing ninety degrees and she immediately felt all the pressure on her shoulders and hips lessen. Sasuke observed her for a while before doing the same thing just two feet away next to her.</p><p>After her breath stabilized, she cocked her head to the right side, finding Sasuke did the same and was already looking at her. Her eyes widened marginally. "Can we rest for a moment and <em>sit</em>?"</p><p>Sasuke sighed as he straightened his back, removed his backpack, then helped her with her backpack. "You should've said it the first time."</p><p>Hinata pouted before forcing her haunches to the ground. "I'm just a burden to this trip. I've asked to rest far too often."</p><p>Sasuke, who was loosening the strap securing her water bottle, glanced up at her briefly. Now holding the water bottle he made his way on his knees to sit next to her. "Here," he said, handing her the water bottle. "Take it easy, it's your first time."</p><p>Hinata obediently took the bottle offered and immediately gulped down a quarter of its content. Wiping her mouth with another hand, she let Sasuke take the bottle out of her grasp. Watching Sasuke drink the remaining portion to make it half from its initial content, Hinata angled her head to the side. "Sasuke."</p><p>Still with the bottle obscuring her view of the lower half of his face, he raised an eyebrow.</p><p>Her eyes landed to the movement of his Adam's apple unconsciously before she caught herself and blinked twice. Her throat felt dry as if she hadn't satiated her thirst not a minute ago. "I've prepared a lot for this trip," she started slowly, staring into a tree bark behind him unseeingly. She darted her eyes to look at his, which were already fixated to hers. "Why aren't you putting up a front showing you're happy? It's the least you can do, yet you don't bother at all."</p><p>Sasuke stared long at her, bringing down the bottle to land on his thigh. His eyes looked distant, but she knew better of the clashing of emotions and whatever turbulence beneath. At last, he sighed in defeat as his gaze softened at her. "I can't keep something from you, can I?"</p><p>"At least tell me what's wrong. I deserve that much."</p><p>"I'll tell you," he assured, glancing at his sports watch. "But, not here. It's getting dark before we know it." He reached out a hand for her to take. "Let's go for now, the check point isn't far from here."</p><p>Still holding their gaze, she took his hand and immediately felt the gentle force coming from him pulling her to stand. "Okay," she affirmed, nodding slightly.</p><hr/><p>Sasuke was right. Even when she had zero experience in this part of the woods, of any outdoor activities in general, she had to agree with him. It was a short ten minutes walk with a relatively flat contour after the steep elevation that had coerced her to just rest. Had Sasuke told her about it, she wouldn't even show that she was tired! Possible. Though she wouldn't bet her life into it.</p><p>With the clearing in sight, Hinata raced forward, leaving behind a chuckling Sasuke. Settling her backpack to lean on one of the trees surrounding them, she stretched and watched as Sasuke did the same to his backpack. They'd had their prearranged tasks and she made sure to divide equally and taking their competency into account.</p><p>Sasuke pulled out a machete from his backpack. "I'll look for firewoods."</p><p>Hinata nodded idly, watching him disappear behind the trees. As she observed the sunlight illuminating the ground through the canopy of the trees, she realized they had to hurry; it wouldn't be long before the sun started to set. She pulled out the tent from Sasuke's backpack. She then expertly installed piece by piece of the frame into place. Expertly because, well, she'd had enough practices with Sasuke beforehand.</p><p>When Sasuke came back with the last stack of woods after his previous multiple stops, the tent just needed to be fixated to the ground and that was when his proficiency came into handy. Hinata quickly occupied her hands with preparing the dinner. Halfway through making dinner, Sasuke had finished setting the tent and made works to kindle the fire.</p><p>With warm dinner ready, the fire had been steadily burning its fuel, and the hunger from a day-long exertion, it was a perfect way to start the evening to say the least. Feeling the breeze of the early evening tease them Hinata snuggled to Sasuke's shoulder. They ate their dinner quietly, too hungry and too tired to do anything else.</p><p>After dinner, Hinata deemed it was necessary to have their jackets easy to reach despite the fire. While she went inside the tent to retrieve their jackets, Sasuke was boiling water for their preferred instant hot drinks; hot chocolate for Hinata and black caffeinated liquid for him. Hinata's head appeared from the front slit that was supposed to be the door for the tent a minute after before the rest of her body followed suit, revealing the bundle of lavender and black within her embrace.</p><p>Putting on her jacket as she walked toward Sasuke she reached out her hand holding his jacket. Sasuke put on his jacket carelessly before handing her a stainless steel mug. Hinata sat next to him, taking the mug gratefully. "Thank you."</p><p>Sasuke nodded, reaching for his own mug. With their hands encircling the mug and absorbing its heat, her head resting on his shoulder and his arm reaching out to encircle her waist loosely, they watched the fire quietly. "Teach me how to start a fire," she voiced quietly.</p><p>Hinata felt his shoulder shake as he chuckled lightly. "Later."</p><p>She closed her eyes and smiled, letting the silence hover for another moment. Then, "Now, tell me."</p><p>Sasuke escaped an imperceptible breath. As much as he wanted to stall the heavy talk, they would need to face the matter in the end. It'd be better to concede with her. "Remember when Naruto couldn't come to hang out with us last week?" he began carefully.</p><p>Hinata nodded against his shoulder, opening her eyes slowly as she sipped on her drink carefully.</p><p>"He'd visited me earlier in the morning to tell things."</p><p>Hinata put her mug on the ground carefully, a hand reaching out to encircle his waist beneath the jacket seeking for more warmth. "What things?"</p><p>"The things I'm not supposed to tell you as our best friend."</p><p>"Okay… Why?"</p><p>Sasuke put down his mug. Turning his head to breathe in her hair. "Can I tell you as my girlfriend who doesn't have any relation to him instead?"</p><p>Hinata turned her head toward his, feeling his head inch away to make room. "I am <em>your </em>girlfriend," she stated, frowning. She kissed him on the lips briefly as if to ensure her statement was taken seriously. Sasuke leaned in to kiss her again, the unoccupied upper limb brought his hand to cup her cheek. He pulled away just enough to look at her eyes intently.</p><p>"Hinata," he breathed, clouds of mist escaped his parted lips, "what if I tell you that Naruto likes you?"</p><p>She simply gazed up at him, blinking naturally. She took it so calmly had it been in another situation he'd take the time to admire her. Inclining her head so their foreheads touched, she deduced in a murmur, "So that's the reason of everything." <em>The reason you invited him to join the trip. The reason Naruto didn't come. The reason you aren't in your best of state. </em>She didn't need to voice her thoughts aloud for Sasuke to understand as he continued to gaze at her in silence, confirming her silent statement.</p><p>"We are so mean," she murmured.</p><p>Sasuke nodded subtly against her forehead.</p><p>"And the fact that I don't feel bad about it, it's worse, isn't it?"</p><p>Sasuke pulled away and held her shoulders, catching a glimpse of tear escaping one corner of her eye before she encircled her arms around his torso, burying her face onto his chest. She didn't say she felt bad for Naruto. She didn't ask what were they supposed to do next regarding the whole thing. She didn't ask him for reassurance.</p><p>But, one thing Sasuke had always known was—and what she was about to say next had conquered all forms of doubt;</p><p>"I like you so much, Sasuke," she admitted quietly to his chest</p><p>—that she was brave, honest, resolute; the things he wasn't. Why was it so hard for him to admit that he too didn't feel bad about the whole thing? Why must he kept on ensuring himself that he felt guilty when in fact he didn't. And he felt much more awful because he didn't. He breathed on her hair, smelling the pleasant scent of rose he had grown to be fond of. "I do too."</p><p>They were selfish. They knew that much. But was it really wrong to be selfish?</p><p>His eyes widened when she took the bold action to initiate the kiss again. And his surprise was overthrown by the desperation that he shared with her. When he teased the orifice of her mouth with his tongue, she welcomed him eagerly. Then suddenly his previous troubled emotions had left him bare, inviting over awaken desires, pumping blood to the places where it belonged. It was as if his hand had its own mind when it reached the site he could only advance in his dreams; something plump, soft, and fitted his palm perfectly. The noble part of his conscience knew it clearly where his hand had landed and had urged him not to proceed. But if he were to admit, he was one to risk it.</p><p>Only when Hinata pulled away abruptly and pushing him away on the shoulders did he realize he had taken things too far, yet he didn't proceed to take his hand off of her right breast. The feel of the soft plump part of her anatomy came into life beneath his palm more than ever.</p><p>Hinata panted, face flushed and eyes downcast, but she made no physical rejection to his hand. "S-Sasuke," she panted softly, "I-I want to take things slow."</p><p>Still in a daze with desire and lust, his mind sluggishly tried to perceive what Hinata had voiced. As if shot by electricity when he became aware of their situation, he pulled his hand away to land on his lap stiffly. Then Sasuke nodded dumbly, eyes staring at a random spot on her somewhat quivering shoulder. "Slow's fine," he reassured, voice raspy. "Slow's great."</p><p>Hinata raised her eyes to look at his bashfully. Still with the blush adorning her cheeks, she nodded faintly, biting her lip before kissing him again.</p><p>Sasuke was still in a trance but his lips complied obediently on their own accord, reuniting with the lips he so loved. Still, his hands remained awkwardly flaccid on his lap. Hinata pulled away slightly, hands reaching down the sides of his arms encouragingly. With eyes closed, she touched her forehead to his.</p><p>"Just focus on us for now," she murmured, "forget other things. I want this to be perfect."</p><p>Sasuke nodded against her forehead, exhaling subtly.</p><p>"And touching's fine," she continued more firmly, "<em>please</em>."</p><p>Listening with his own ears of the words he had been wanting to hear from her, Sasuke couldn't stop the chuckle from escaping his mouth. He was that relieved.</p><p>Cupping both her cheeks gently, he nodded. "Touching's fine. Noted."</p><p>Now taking the initiation to kiss her, it took them both off guard by the force when their lips met. It didn't take long before his hands landed to the places where they belonged.</p><hr/><p>Hinata had been stubborn to stay awake until midnight. But the night breeze, the somehow soothing crickets chirping, and the comfortable heat coming from the fire were all in favor to make her eyelids heavy. It didn't take long for her to succumb into deep sleep after she gave in helping him rekindling the fire and opted to lean her back on the tree trunk nearest to their tent. She had chosen the very spot to comfortably watch him in the work, while still at a safe distance to receive adequate heat from the fire, but it didn't really affect her in any way to keep her from falling asleep.</p><p>It was their fault from neglecting the simplest task; watching the fire. It was far too late when she first realized the heat had long gone and she had pulled away from him, directing her head to the supposedly blazing fire.</p><p>When Sasuke reckoned the fuel had kept the fire steadily enough, Hinata had long gone into a deep slumber. He snorted blithely. "So much for being stubborn," he mumbled.</p><p>He made his way to sit next to her and leaning his back on the tree trunk. Slowly, while observing her closely as if he wanted to cherish every miniscule details on her person, gently but confidently he guided her head to settle on his shoulder.</p><p>He diverted his eyes to watch the fire, feeling contented with everything; the weight on his shoulder, the bundle of warmth next to him, the steady rhythm of her breath, and the feel of her hair brushing his chin. It hadn't felt the time had passed that long when he idly glanced at his watch. But it wasn't the hour nor the minutes that had caught his attention; it was the date. The date on his watch had advanced another day. And sure it was, the time had shown it was already ten minutes past midnight.</p><p>He didn't know where did it come from. But he laughed unreservedly. He laughed at their blunder. At how easily they'd missed the anticipated time. At how quick it was for him to feel it wasn't so important anymore.</p><p>Because what's important had been within his embrace.</p><p>Literally.</p><p>And he'd do what was necessary; he'd take his present himself.</p><p>First he kissed her right eyelids gently, silently asking them to open, to reveal the majestic pearly orbs that held so many emotions every time he gazed at those eyes. He felt her lashes flutter subtly against his lips. His lips moved away to kiss the other eyelids, ever so gently. Her lashes fluttered again and he smiled against her eyelids.</p><p>He pulled away just enough to observe the flutter of her lashes as she opened her eyes slowly. Through half-lidded eyes, she stared at him drowsily, lazily moving her gaze about from his eyes to his nose and down to his lips.</p><p>It wasn't long before her silent plea was all but answered when he kissed her on the mouth.</p><p>It wasn't long before she awoke completely, palms tracing the sides of his arms, reaching to his nape, and finding their way to tangle all fingers on his soft dark hair.</p><p>"Happy birthday," she whispered as she pulled away to take a breath. "Sasuke."</p><p>Another kiss was her only answer. She responded with a flick of her tongue, asking for re-entrance. He complied with great fervor as his senses heightened in perceiving their surrounding; the crickets chirping telling him they weren't alone in the woods, the crackling of the fire giving out its heat to them even though their internal heat at the moment was more than enough. It felt so damn real; the trip, his birthday, and Hinata as his one and only companion that he cared about. The feel of her body within his embrace, the rosy scent of her hair pleasantly brushing his nostrils, and the softness of her lips had never felt this real—this exhilarating.</p><p>Everything was perfect and he couldn't ask for more;</p><p>he couldn't ask for a better birthday present.</p>
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